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EnglishInvader
Deinonychus
Joined: Sep 15, 2009
Age: 28
Posts: 307
Location: Hertfordshire, UK
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 Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:13 pm Post subject: |
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[quote="LadyMacbeth"][quote="RainSong"][quote="LadyMacbeth"] | Maggiedoll wrote: |
Fathers have rights. There are courts. |
The ironic thing is that his current behaviour is proving him to be an unfit parent. If I were a family court judge, I would be reluctant to authorise anything beyond supervised visitation rights.
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Apple_in_my_Eye
Phoenix
Joined: May 08, 2008
Age: 41
Posts: 630
Location: Youessae, on the Pacific side
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| Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:17 pm Post subject: |
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| LadyMacbeth wrote: | | Fathers have rights. There are courts. There's also his (ex)girlfriend involved in this.. who as it says has told her mother the truth, and it's her say, not her mother's. |
The situation sounds more complicated than that. The mother sounds to have gotten legal guardianship over her daughter, which I think strips the daughter of adult legal rights. I'm not sure the daughter (or the father of the baby) has any legal power to override the guardian's wishes, even regarding the fate of the baby. Also, going to court is expensive, and you don't get free public legal representation for a situation like he's in. |
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LadyMacbeth
They made me do it.
Joined: May 28, 2007
Posts: 1866
Location: In the girls toilets at Hogwarts, washing the blood off my hands.
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| Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:19 pm Post subject: |
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[quote="EnglishInvader"][quote="LadyMacbeth"][quote="RainSong"] | LadyMacbeth wrote: | | Maggiedoll wrote: |
Fathers have rights. There are courts. |
The ironic thing is that his current behaviour is proving him to be an unfit parent. If I were a family court judge, I would be reluctant to authorise anything beyond supervised visitation rights. |
Point well made.
Sorry about my outbursts, anyway. It's just that it's, one might say, a pet peeve of mine that parents (unborn or not) can even consider suicide.
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Last edited by LadyMacbeth on Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:22 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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RainSong
Seatbelts Totally Cause Autism
Joined: May 02, 2006
Posts: 4451
Location: Georgia
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| Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:21 pm Post subject: |
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| Apple_in_my_Eye wrote: | | I'm not sure the daughter (or the father of the baby) has any legal power to override the guardian's wishes, even regarding the fate of the baby. |
I know that if a couple chooses to give a child up for adoption, the grandparents cannot overrule it; they've had a couple of cases where it's gone to court, including one with a autistic child. Beyond that, I don't know.
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"Nothing worth having is easy."
Empathy is when you feel the emotions of someone else despite never having been through the same or similar situation. Sympathy is when you feel the emotions and have been through the same or similar situation. |
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leejosepho
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 15, 2009
Age: 59
Posts: 672
Location: 100 miles east of Chicago
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| Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:30 pm Post subject: |
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| LadyMacbeth wrote: | | ... it's, one might say, a pet peeve of mine that parents (unborn or not) can even consider suicide. |
Agreed. Even the simplest of love for one's child could not possibly lead to suicide.
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GoonSquad
Phoenix
Joined: May 12, 2007
Age: 39
Posts: 528
Location: The City of Townsville
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| Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:46 pm Post subject: |
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| LadyMacbeth wrote: | | Maggiedoll wrote: |
Edit: this is dumb, but he mentioned in that note about his dog, and I keep thinking about how abandoned the dog is going to feel. Not wanting to abandon Piper has kept me from killing myself more than once. |
Erm, yeah, no offence, but stuff the dog - he is father to an unborn child?! How f***ing selfish is that?! |
Honestly, the kid's probably better off without a father like this...
On a side note, I think threads like this simply encourage bad and dangerous behavior and should have no place here...
It's a good job the guy didn't show a cat's bottom in his suicide note, because then our crackerjack mods would delete it, tout suite... 
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Apple_in_my_Eye
Phoenix
Joined: May 08, 2008
Age: 41
Posts: 630
Location: Youessae, on the Pacific side
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| Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:47 pm Post subject: |
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| RainSong wrote: | | Apple_in_my_Eye wrote: | | I'm not sure the daughter (or the father of the baby) has any legal power to override the guardian's wishes, even regarding the fate of the baby. |
I know that if a couple chooses to give a child up for adoption, the grandparents cannot overrule it; they've had a couple of cases where it's gone to court, including one with a autistic child. Beyond that, I don't know. |
Yeah, though the idea of guardianship is the person who is the 'ward' (person under the guardian's power) is automatically legally incompetent. So I'm not sure she'd have the right to challege anything. It's sounds like a very nasty set up. I think she can ask for a change of guardian, depending on the state, though. If so, the ball is in the daughter's court. |
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leejosepho
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 15, 2009
Age: 59
Posts: 672
Location: 100 miles east of Chicago
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| Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:58 pm Post subject: |
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My son-in-law and older daughter have some kind of guardianship over my son-in-law's infant niece who has incompetent parents who have not been together since the birth, and the judge goes out of his way to be sure no parental rights or priorities are being violated or ignored.
I know virtually nothing about this particular situation, but I have yet to hear a legitimate lament from either parent.
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My search ended right here on WrongPlanet. |
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EnglishInvader
Deinonychus
Joined: Sep 15, 2009
Age: 28
Posts: 307
Location: Hertfordshire, UK
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 12:01 am Post subject: |
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[quote="GoonSquad"][quote="LadyMacbeth"] | Maggiedoll wrote: |
On a side note, I think threads like this simply encourage bad and dangerous behavior and should have no place here...
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Let's face it, Aspies are just as voyeuristic as the rest of the world  .
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"Haven't you got a gnome to go to?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBsUjGGkbSk |
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sgrannel
Dr. Strangelove
Joined: Feb 21, 2008
Posts: 1158
Location: The Bland Corporation
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 12:17 am Post subject: |
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Why not just wait for the girlfriend to get old enough to move away from the parents? Some problems resolve themselves when you just sleep on it.
The story fits a pattern similar to a family member who threatened suicide some time ago. He's doing this to manipulate someone, possibly the girlfriend's mother, who apparently posted on his blog.
A person may say he's going to kill himself by taking pills he probably doesn't even have, watches the drama, and gets what he wants when everyone is relieved to find out the situation wasn't so bad after all. It's a psychological level shifting tactic.
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Graelwyn
Myrrdyn
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Joined: Dec 21, 2006
Age: 34
Posts: 8667
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 12:31 am Post subject: |
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You can never know when it is a tactic to attain attention, or a genuine cry for help that might go wrong.
Some people kill themselves on video, I know someone who had to watch a female on webcam take her life in front of him and he had no forewarning.
I don't know that threats of suicide should ever be taken lightly, even if they are made often, as each threat might be made in a desperate emotional state where the person genuinely feels like taking their lives...and of course, they then feel pretty stupid afterwards when they are still alive, having been unable to do it or having been talked out of it.
It takes a real effort in most cases, I think, to actually do it, to do something that is irreversible. I know because I have been suicidal so often, and have come so close, and have spent hours considering the quickest most surest methods, but have never been able to actually take that one last step.
then of course, if you have said you are going to do it, you then have everyone telling you you were just playing on peoples emotions, trying to gain attention...well a lot of people who reach a point of being suicidal, maybe need attention. or they wouldnt have reached that point to begin with, surely. |
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leejosepho
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 15, 2009
Age: 59
Posts: 672
Location: 100 miles east of Chicago
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 12:59 am Post subject: |
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Suicide threats should never be taken lightly -- they are always a cry for some kind of help.
Many years ago, a young man told me he had attempted suicide a couple of times and had since considered it again. I told him I would not be in attendance at his funeral if he ever again tried suicide without calling me beforehand. A few weeks later, he called early one morning to say "Goodbye." I said "Goodbye" in return and immediately hung up on him so I could call the police. Two weeks later, he still had not figured out how the police had known to show up and stop him ... and today that man who has since been spiritually transformed is my son-in-law.
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Graelwyn
Myrrdyn
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Joined: Dec 21, 2006
Age: 34
Posts: 8667
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 1:16 am Post subject: |
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You sound like a good man, Leejose.
I think someone on this site or another site did the same to me once. At the time I was angry.
I am in the uk so I have no idea how they contacted police here, but they turned up at my door as I had been posting at the time about being suicidal.
The only issue is that now, I am too scared mostly to tell anyone when I am as I have a fear of them turning up again. |
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sinsboldly
Free Range Aspie
Joined: Nov 22, 2006
Age: 59
Posts: 13221
Location: Oregon, USA
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 2:18 am Post subject: |
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| Graelwyn wrote: | You sound like a good man, Leejose.
I think someone on this site or another site did the same to me once. At the time I was angry.
I am in the uk so I have no idea how they contacted police here, but they turned up at my door as I had been posting at the time about being suicidal.
The only issue is that now, I am too scared mostly to tell anyone when I am as I have a fear of them turning up again. |
yes, I would never mention I felt suicidal, even if I did, as it freaks people out so much. I remember other times on WP one of the members was in post partum depression and said she was thinking about doing a Columbine style shooting and she was tracked down and got mental health help and financial help. It happens all the time.
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GoonSquad
Phoenix
Joined: May 12, 2007
Age: 39
Posts: 528
Location: The City of Townsville
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 2:52 am Post subject: |
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you know, cyber-bulling by people who abuse their power could cause suicidal tendencies. Good thing that never happens around here! 
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwfMstI3bpA |
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