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[quote="CSBurks"]I guess people tend to classify what they don't understand, even when they have limited knowledge to do so. I'm guessing people have more experience with homosexuality than AS or ASD, so they classify you as a homosexual based on their limited knowledge. Some people have thought I was gay and some haven't. But I don't know what most people think.[/quote]
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<table border="0" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1" width="100%" class="forumline"> <tr> <th class="thCornerL" width="22%" height="26">Author</th> <th class="thCornerR">Message</th> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>opal</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Wed May 09, 2012 8:11 am<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">Yes. Some people have thought I was gay, and I have been referred to as " Uncle opal" by my young nieces and nephews , who are presumably confused by my manerisms and dress. It is a rarity for me to wear a dress - I an most comfortable in jeans and androgynous atttire, and rarely wear makeup due to sensitivity and the fact that it is too much effort. <br /> <br />edit: I'm straight, I am just an androgynous straight female, of an age where it is probably not considered " cute" or P.C. to be androgynous.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row2"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>yellowtamarin</b></span></td> <td class="row2" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Wed May 09, 2012 6:45 am<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">I think nearly everyone assumes I'm straight. I never get hit on by females. I think this is because, while I do not dress in a feminine way or wear makeup, jewellery, etc., I also do not do anything extra to give off an impression I might be interested in women. I am very unadventurous with my appearance so my hair is just straight and usually long, and my clothing is really...um...mainstream-boring. I feel that if I went and shaved the side of my head or something, I'd give off a different vibe.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>auntblabby</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Wed May 09, 2012 4:42 am<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">i'm pat. <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_wink.gif" alt="Wink" border="0" /></span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row2"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>godoftruemercy</b></span></td> <td class="row2" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Tue May 08, 2012 10:59 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">Everyone thinks I'm straight, which is confusing. I really don't get it. More than a little butch here.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Canis_Majoris</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 8:33 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody"></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>AstroGeek wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote">Back in grade 9 someone asked if I was gay. At the time I thought that they were mistaken. Turns out they had a better sense of things than I did.</td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />That's basically my experience as well. In high school (when I assumed I was straight cause I had never heard of asexuality) I think I got asked out/hit on by every bi and lesbian girl in the school. I currently label myself as demisexual/panromantic.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row2"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Joker</b></span></td> <td class="row2" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 3:35 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">Not really sure to be honest.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Bun</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 1:13 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">Yeah, you're right, it would be sort of impossible to read someone as asexual if there aren't any other assumptions involved.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row2"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Mayel</b></span></td> <td class="row2" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 1:10 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody"></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>Bun wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote"> <br />* I think it was mostly your musical preferences... <br />* Well, it starts from the fact I get mistaken for single, even if the same people talk to me on Facebook, and my profile has a link to my fiancé's page... But then there's also the fact people devalue/minimize my own romantic experiences if I do tell them, I'm disabled, fat, short, wearing glasses etc., so people just expect me to not have a life, it's hard to be on a constant campaign to explain that I don't 'do nothing' like they think I do. <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_rolleyes.gif" alt="Rolling Eyes" border="0" /></td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />Yes, my musical preferences (a part of them) got me also into this assumption once or twice. <br />It's because as I've written, I've got a lesbian friend which shares with me her musical discoveries from time to time which are often lesbian artists. When she showed me the band "The Organ", that's when I thought "such beautiful music and it's not famous...etc.". So I researched L-music to see if there were more treasures which don't get into the mainstream because the artists are gay or not beautiful enough....or whatever. It was one of my special interests. <br /> <br />And, .. that's right. People assume disabled and/or overweight people are automatically asexual. But that's more of a prejudiced based on disability than on asexuality itself.Nonetheless, I see now why people would mistake you for asexual.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Bun</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 12:54 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody"></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>Mayel wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote"></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>Bun wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote">I mistook you for one, and I haven't even seen you. <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_eek.gif" alt="Shocked" border="0" /> </td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />Are you basing this assumption solely on my musical preferences? Or is there something else? <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_smile.gif" alt="Smile" border="0" /> <br /> <br /> <br /></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>Quote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote">I swear I either get mistaken for a complete asexual, or a complete sex maniac... Not by the same people, mind - people would usually assume the former, but I got the latter accusation from one or two people.</td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />Is that even possible? <br />I wonder how that works since I thought asexuals weren't that visible to society anyway. Therefore no stereotypes exist. Maybe they do.</td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br /> <br />* I think it was mostly your musical preferences... <br />* Well, it starts from the fact I get mistaken for single, even if the same people talk to me on Facebook, and my profile has a link to my fiancé's page... But then there's also the fact people devalue/minimize my own romantic experiences if I do tell them, I'm disabled, fat, short, wearing glasses etc., so people just expect me to not have a life, it's hard to be on a constant campaign to explain that I don't 'do nothing' like they think I do. <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_rolleyes.gif" alt="Rolling Eyes" border="0" /></span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row2"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Mayel</b></span></td> <td class="row2" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 12:41 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody"></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>Bun wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote">I mistook you for one, and I haven't even seen you. <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_eek.gif" alt="Shocked" border="0" /> </td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />Are you basing this assumption solely on my musical preferences? Or is there something else? <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_smile.gif" alt="Smile" border="0" /> <br /> <br /> <br /></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>Quote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote">I swear I either get mistaken for a complete asexual, or a complete sex maniac... Not by the same people, mind - people would usually assume the former, but I got the latter accusation from one or two people.</td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />Is that even possible? <br />I wonder how that works since I thought asexuals weren't that visible to society anyway. Therefore no stereotypes exist. Maybe they do.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Bun</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 2:09 am<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">I mistook you for one, and I haven't even seen you. <img src="modules/Forums/images/smiles/icon_eek.gif" alt="Shocked" border="0" /> <br /> <br /> <br />I swear I either get mistaken for a complete asexual, or a complete sex maniac... Not by the same people, mind - people would usually assume the former, but I got the latter accusation from one or two people.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row2"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>lxuser</b></span></td> <td class="row2" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 1:06 am<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">I have had numerous mothers tell me how I look gorgeous and I should hook up with their daughters. They really have no clue, do they.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>AstroGeek</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Thu May 03, 2012 9:18 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">Back in grade 9 someone asked if I was gay. At the time I thought that they were mistaken. Turns out they had a better sense of things than I did.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row2"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>edgewaters</b></span></td> <td class="row2" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Thu May 03, 2012 8:52 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody"></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>Mayel wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote">Because wouldn't that imply there are more assumptions about something that are shared among a group, but those assumptions seem to differ from group to group.</td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br /> <br />That's one possible explanation. But I think it goes more like this. Other straight guys know I'm a straight guy because we're both interested in the same thing and they can relate. Also, we're competitors. Not proud of it but I was at one point sleeping with someone's girlfriend (before anyone bites my head off, I didn't initiate, they'd been together for a year and they hated each other, and I'm still with her, 13 years later) <br /> <br />There were three instances of this that I know about, all were straight women I'd interacted with but didn't know very well, all of them asked one of my friends rather than me directly. My thinking is that they were flirting with me, I didn't see it, and they couldn't figure out why. So it occurred to them that I might be gay.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Mayel</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://cdn.wrongplanet.net/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Thu May 03, 2012 12:44 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody"></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>edgewaters wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote">Yeah ... but only by women, oddly enough. I've never been mistaken for gay by other guys (including gays), that I know of.</td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />I think that's intresting if just one "group" classifies you as ... in this case gay. <br />Because wouldn't that imply there are more assumptions about something that are shared among a group, but those assumptions seem to differ from group to group. <br />(Although you can't really generalize all women or all men or whatever) <br /> <br /></span><table width="90%" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="3" border="0" align="center"><tr> <td><span class="genmed"><b>CSBurks wrote:</b></span></td> </tr> <tr> <td class="quote"> <br />I'm guessing people have more experience with homosexuality than AS or ASD, so they classify you as a homosexual based on their limited knowledge. <br /></td> </tr></table><span class="postbody"> <br />Mhmm....that's another point. Limited knowledge. <br /> <br />That's probably the main generalizing point; the big picture.</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> </table>
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