Cat-calling is harmless flattery...

Post Reply New Topic

Cat calling is sexual harassment which should be punishible by bludgeoning with batons, tazing and macing and broken bones and threats of death for a second offense! Followed by a fine of 60000000$

Okay then who do these women go for? Who are their boyfriends? What is so special about the attention they give? How are they any different from other men? What magic do they do? telepathic seduction?

You make it seem like women don't want anything to do with the opposite sex, that men are just all gross and creepy.

So what do women want if they don't want the attention of men?

Last edited by geometrictunneling on 27 Nov 2014, 10:20 am, edited 2 times in total.

You are confusing catcalling with asking somebody out on a date. The two situations have no overlap.

It's a matter of whether or not the attention is invited. A prevailing misconception about human sexuality is that the male is generally the initiator, but this is not actually how it works. I am a gay guy, and when I am in the more "feminine" role, there are ways that I behave that solicits the attentions of men.

The thing is, I am not fully aware that I am doing them, except people start paying more attention to me when I am doing them. It's weird, but it's a set of involuntary behaviors that are based on a semi-voluntary state of mind.

When I suspect others are doing it, figuring out when it's appropriate to make a move would be a matter of inquiry and testing. For instance, after associating with a guy for a while and talking to him, I might start steering the conversation increasingly toward more romantic subject matter. First, I might start with talking about places I like to travel, and I might say I like going to Charleston. I might start talking about vaguely romantic things to do in Charleston.

And I'll start talking in a more lyrical manner, with more of a rocking rhythm in my intonation, and if I'm hitting all the right spots, he'll start treating me as if I must be very knowledgeable and being sort of deferential, saying things like "Wow! I didn't know that there were still places to go like that!" when I bring up Middleton Place, which is located there and is profoundly romantic.

Then, I might stop and say, "You know, I think it's really cute what your upper-lip does when you smile" or point out some other harmless idiosyncrasy. I might say, "I notice your eyes are sort of amber. It's rare, even more-so than green. They're called wolf-eyes." I might drop my voice into a sort of husky tone at the end, there.

And then I might start getting more adventurous, but the thing is, I don't give anything uninvited. I look for openings. I look for double-entendres, which are statements that could be taken in at least two different ways. I don't just horn in. He makes an opening, I confirm it, and then I move. He makes another opening, I confirm it, then I move. It sounds complicated, but it feels natural when you do it.

But just pressing yourself on somebody would be...creepy. It's not that men are, in general, creepy. Ones who don't have respect are creepy. One thing that is very disrespectful is making unsolicited remarks that sexualize a person.

Explain? So when a guy asks a girl out she doesn't think that's gross or creepy? Woman make it seem like you have to be extremely careful with what you say and hide your sexuality completely if you want to date them...as if your tricking them to achieve the same goal as the cat callers.

A catcall is really more related to mockery. It's a way of cheapening someone.

I understand but can you answer some of the questions in my previous posts?

This is really interesting to me and frustrating at the same time because its as if gross creepy men are ruining it for the rest of us normal men. Now we have to be extremely careful and crafty if we want positive reactions from women.

Last edited by geometrictunneling on 27 Nov 2014, 6:14 pm, edited 2 times in total.

This = News.
News = rare.
This = rare.

Get over it.
Stop letting News Drama-Panic Mongering define your interpretation of what to expect if a guy likes you.

Or
Keep going with it cuz itza good never-ending trolling topic...

This is so completely untrue.
How unfortunately clueless.

Poor form.
You don't like it so you slap a "it musta be a trollin' topik!" sticker on it?

Booo.

The half-assed application of "OH NOES TROLLING" is a prime example of "it's never happened to me, so stop your whimpering".

---


No, you will. Well, maybe you won't. I will, and be wondering if I can outrun them or not if they turn out to be unpredictably violent and/or aggressive. Cat-calling is not just done by frustrated old men, it can lead to violence- did you read the first post or just jump in with both idiot feet here to join in the tussle?

---
1401b,
I hope you have no mother, sister, aunt, daughter, female cousin, female friends, girlfriends... basically any females you care about at all. You probably don't want to know what actually goes through their head as a constant in regards to how safe they do or do not feel when some random guy [or a group of them] yells at them on the street.

For me? I get to decide what I need to do in case their actual goal is to violate me- because there is no way to know that is not the end goal. It is a very reasonable fear.
Many women who haven't ended up in that specific situation actually feel they must strategize like that.

Many men as well.



Well, great! So what does go through your head when you catcall, 1401b?

Just kidding! TROLOLOLOLOLOL, right 1401b? That's what it's all about. I don't need to tell you that.

Last edited by SignOfLazarus on 27 Nov 2014, 7:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm not sure where you are finding fault here.
I can be as empowered and independent as I want- if someone is simply stronger than me and intent on harm all the confidence in the world won't make me able to overcome that. There is a wall when it comes to physical strength, even if I have ways to improve my chances. There is a point where I wouldn't win.

I don't know why that is a bizarre idea. Have you not been in that kind of situation or feared you might be?

Well, there are psychopathic, paranoid, crazy women who leave men thinking that all women must be crazy.

There are narcissistic scum who take pleasure in treating every man who talks to them or looks at them as if he must be hitting on them, regardless of what he is doing, and they have a giant chip on their shoulder. Does this ruin things for others? Yes.

There are women who will call security or the cops on you for no reason at all or sic 300 Lb. gorillas on you just for the pleasure of someone "coming to her rescue" or something, particularly if you are weird or autistic.

There are women who are emotional vampires.

Self-centered, shallow and materialistic.

A lot of women marry affluent, clueless men just so they can get a fat divorce settlement later.

Yes, unpleasant and selfish people ruin things for everyone else. It is the reason that we can't all just trust each other without giving it a second's thought. That makes me very sad. I can't really do much to change it.

Or you could just be real. Be yourself. If a woman won't take you as you are today, then she won't take you as you are 40 years from now. If that means a lot of women finding you to be weird and creepy, then just hold out for the one who actually loves you for that.

You are not going to make everybody happy with you, and the fact is that you are going to offend a lot of people over the course of being an honest and true person. A lot of women may even think that you are a lot of things that you are not. Do not feel entitled for women to really be into you. You are not. A lot of them are really arrogant, self-entitled, judgmental morons, anyway, who will rob you blind under the pretense of being "high-maintenance." Not everyone is meant for you, and if you do something stupid like pretending to be more affluent than you actually are, then you're asking for trouble.

A lot of times, it's not you, but it's them. They won't admit it, but it's true. A lot of times, you might have approached a woman with nothing but good intentions, and she treated you like you were some abomination. You might have even had women call the law on you for trying to say something genuinely nice. Wow! I could have told you the world is full of judgmental morons with bankrupted values YEARS ago. I could have told you TWO DECADES ago. A lot of times, people see that you are different and assume that you are a bad person, and you cannot let the blindness of other people control how you see yourself.

But to be your real self, you have to make an investment of trust in someone, and when you make that investment of trust, you can get really hurt. It's a hard thing to do. It's hard thing to open ourselves up to the possibility of being misjudged or abused. That trust, though, is what really serves as the foundation of a bond between you and another person.

The kinds of men who issue catcalls, though, are not looking for a date. They might enjoy having someone to use for a while, but they don't really have much capacity in them for love. Maybe it's hard for you to see another person as a thing to be used, but it's all some people know.

Ah thanks so its just out of physical fear of men that women are careful, sounds deep routed in evolution. Unfortunate its that way. I hear women talking about gross creepy men all the time so I started to wonder if women even want men anymore.

I always thought us men were more afraid of women...

SignOfLazarus, I started typing out a long, in-depth response to your last post, but I've decided to abandon that. Your intention of baiting me into bickering over trivialities rather than discussing the issue at hand is pretty self-evident, and I have better things to do with my time.

Well, of course not. No one is obligated to explain anything they say at all, but nevertheless, it is a sign of profound immaturity to make a point in an open debate, refuse to respond to someone who has challenged that point, and instead quote them out of context before spewing a load of (poorly) manufactured moral outrage over some irrelevant triviality as justification for your refusal to engage in discourse with them.

Rather than admitting that you were mistaken or explaining your point further, you've decided to behave like a cowardly, dishonest brat, and I won't be wasting any more time on you.

Do some people truly not understand that catcalling is obnoxious behavior?

No it is entirely true. You do not cat call someone you deeply respect.