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BellaDonna
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01 Feb 2009, 6:28 pm

millie wrote:
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D1nk0 wrote:
With no intention to be defamatory, I am starting to conclude that one of the ways in which asperger syndrome affects women is that it results in a weaker sex drive(sometimes NO sex drive Whatsover). Apparently there are also many men who are afflicted the same way-though I personally am NOT one of them. I do know that (mani-depressive)bipolar disorder seems to affect women in the opposite way: bipolar womn often have abnormally strong sex drives whenever they get manic.
I keep seing posts hinting at: "women dont really want sex and dont like it, they just use it as a currency" which is Totally UNTRUE when it comes to most NT women but aspie women are another story.....


i think this is a rather simplistic summation of a complex issue for AS people - both men and women.
my sex drive is perectly fine. it is definitely dulled when i am on antisepressants and i suspect a lot of the medications prescribed for As people actually affect sexual functioning and appetite.

the other issue is that many people with AS actually crave the physical contact but cannot cope with the arbitrary touch and the sensory dysfuntion problems that are often a part of life with AS.

SO the sex drive may indeed be there, but he ability and capaicty to consummate it with another human being may be very very difficult.

and then of course there is the social aspect ---- how does one actually navigate through the dating minefield if you have AS? i've never successfully mangaed that one and every parnter i have ever had has commented on how weird i have been in this regard.

i am starting to believe that virtual sex is about as good as it can get for me.
I did watch "Lars and the Real GIrl" the other day., and an anatomically correct doll seems to be the answer for some. at least it could listen to my monlogues and i would e uninterrupted and then not expect me to listen in return when they want to do the social chit chat thing.
I also wouldn;t get balled out for being a complete fruitcake and failure on a daily basis.


No, I thought you put it is definetly not dulled.



BellaDonna
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02 Feb 2009, 9:35 am

My sex drive has definetly been dulled by antipsychotics type medications, along with everything else.
However, I have found antidepressants not to have such affect. I still have a strong desire for sex and/or to masturbate and I always have. I asked my doctor and they said, "Not every one has the same of side effects." I guess, maybe, because I have been on them for about 9 years - I have gotten use to them.



monkees4va
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04 Feb 2009, 10:37 am

hopefully without sounding like a s*lg, oh nope. NO problems with sex drive whatsoever.
;)


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RightGalaxy
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04 Feb 2009, 12:23 pm

I'm only interested when I'm ovulating. I appreciate a handsome guy but see him as a sort of physical artwork. I don't desire to have sex with him. I just like starring at him and wishing I were beautiful too. So much for "sex drive". What about "love drive"? The desire to love and be loved. Sex for me is this: The piece of meat goes in and then it comes out. A lot of ooo, ahh, and it's over! Such a hurdle to have to jump when there is so many other things to do.
Sex is sooo overrated! In some countries, not a lot of thought goes into it because they're so busy just trying to stay alive or exhausted over the amount of work they had to do just for a bowl of rice and hot pepper to go with it. Sex without repro is a luxury actually. A brief thrill.
You can achieve the same thing on some of the newer roller coasters. I actually saw a guy pee his pants on one.



RightGalaxy
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04 Feb 2009, 12:35 pm

Catwoman wrote:
I usually have the opposite problem...constantly thinking about sex, until I started taking SSRIs/SNRIs a couple of years ago.

The drive is revved up if I meet someone who is interested in me. If there are no prospects, then I just get used to not having any and lose interest.

I am also extremely cautious of any sexual involvement; becoming physically intimate with someone intensifies my desire for emotional intimacy as well. If the latter is not reciprocated, then I feel very depressed and disappointed. Not something I want in my life right now.

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cassandra
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06 Feb 2009, 3:01 am

When I was younger I used to have a normal sex drive, but since taking the contraceptive pill, it has reduced that to virtually nothing :(



Morgana
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06 Feb 2009, 5:34 pm

cassandra wrote:
When I was younger I used to have a normal sex drive, but since taking the contraceptive pill, it has reduced that to virtually nothing :(


Oh yes, the pill will do that! I always say that that´s why the pill works so well as a contraception method. :lol:

I finally went off the pill, for that, and other reasons.


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BellaDonna
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06 Feb 2009, 11:42 pm

I don't take the pill. I use condoms.



mitharatowen
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07 Feb 2009, 12:16 am

The pill has a lower failure rate than condoms, though.



MsTriste
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07 Feb 2009, 11:18 am

Definitely disagree with original poster. We're all different. I've been blessed, even to the extent of certain SSRI's actually enhancing the experience.



garyww
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07 Feb 2009, 12:03 pm

It has been my experience that both men and women with AS (and/or unusual personalities on the NT spectrum) have much higher sex drive than 'regular' people. I've thought this was a good thing but have noticed several threads where it seems to be less desireable for some. I think the enhanced libido is not the result of AS but rather a general feeling of independence and individuality that 'free' thinkers often have.


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Lonermutant
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07 Feb 2009, 1:05 pm

I think it's easier for women with AS who are socially incompetent or doesn't desire sex or a relationship, they aren't automatically regarded and/or rumored to be gay or pedophiles like many men with AS are.



zee
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07 Feb 2009, 1:54 pm

garyww wrote:
It has been my experience that both men and women with AS (and/or unusual personalities on the NT spectrum) have much higher sex drive than 'regular' people. I've thought this was a good thing but have noticed several threads where it seems to be less desireable for some. I think the enhanced libido is not the result of AS but rather a general feeling of independence and individuality that 'free' thinkers often have.

Is it possible that these people may just seem to have a greater need for sex because they are more likely to be rejected as lovers?



garyww
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07 Feb 2009, 2:04 pm

No I don't think so as it's usually the opposite and they get rejected less or at least handle rejection much better since by and large they have a deeper understanding of themselves forced upon them by their condition (self studiers if there is a such a thing).
Even in the regular world I don't think to many people are rejected due to sexuality but other factors of their personalities but making it a sexual excuse makes it easier for the party that's doing the dumping.


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garyww
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07 Feb 2009, 2:04 pm

No I don't think so as it's usually the opposite and they get rejected less or at least handle rejection much better since by and large they have a deeper understanding of themselves forced upon them by their condition (self studiers if there is a such a thing).
Even in the regular world I don't think to many people are rejected due to sexuality but other factors of their personalities but making it a sexual excuse makes it easier for the party that's doing the dumping.


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cassandra
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08 Feb 2009, 10:21 am

To be honest. I would rather sit down with a tasty slice of pizza and the new series of Battlestar galactica any day. Sex is dull :P