What should I do about this situation? How do I answer?

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crazycoffeeunicorn92
Hummingbird
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Joined: 12 Jan 2017
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 19
Location: USA

28 Jun 2017, 7:17 pm

So I've been wanting to bleach my hair but don't want to go to the salons in my area cause I hear horror stories about them messing up people's hair and had an extremely bad experience the only two times I've & I also don't want my hairstylist friend to do it either. The one time she tried to bleach it it turned out super orange and left a brown spot. I posted pics on a few sites of my hair asking for advice on how to do it myself but didn't get any answers. Wanted to post question on Instagram but friends with hairstylist friend on there but didnt. I eventually got desperate for answers and said wtf. Well she says why don't you let me do it? I have a tub of bleach and will do it for free won't charge you. Well I don't want anybody but myself doing it plus when would she have time to we both have 2 kids a piece. It'd be easier for me to do it myself. Also i forgot to mention she graduated a couple years ago from cosmology school and still kinda sucks at hair. She also messed my sister in laws hair up too. Question is how do I let her request down gently without hurting her feelings?



bunnyb
Veteran
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Joined: 3 Mar 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 589
Location: Australia

30 Jun 2017, 9:41 am

Tell her you are having second thoughts and feel it wont suit you then start looking for an experienced colourist. Not all hairdressers understand colour and if you had a bad bleach last time, I think it's probably because you have hard to bleach hair and doing it yourself probably wont work as well as you would like.
My hairdresser is colourist. She really, really knows hair types and how they will react. She does great colour as well as great haircuts. If the hairdressers near you suck, look further away. A great hairdresser is worth traveling for and worth paying good money for because a bad cut or colour is devastating.


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Leelu
Emu Egg
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Joined: 7 Jul 2017
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 2
Location: California

08 Jul 2017, 12:38 pm

Going completely blonde can be shocking on several levels (I've done it twice, my hair is dark brown). First you may have a hard time getting used to it, and you'll have to get used to people's comments (which can be endlessly tiresome). Second it can change the texture of your hair (when I went white blonde my fine hair became very cottony) and you may have to develop new styling methods.

Might I suggest trying highlights or strands of color first? This would also let you try out a few salons/stylists to gauge your comfort level with them.

I would definitely suggest that you find a good salon that uses natural products (like an Aveda salon) because their processes are much less toxic. Aveda stylists go through periodic training throughout their careers, and the salons are more often spa like in feeling because the company is based on natural sources and tries to put out a Buddhist vibe. That said each salon is owned individually so they differ in environment, but generally they don't have the strong odors of traditional salons (which I can not stand), play more mellow music and they offer you a cup of tea.

A concern for using natural products may also be a good way to let your friend down without hurting her feelings too much.

I've been dying my hair for 20+ years (I change colors periodically) and find it worthwhile to spend more money on a good salon. Since we're not weathly though I only get it done about 4x a year.

I personally hate having to find a new salon/stylist (my stylist of 15 years just quit) so I understand how you feel. Salons can make me feel terrible when I feel like I'm being judged by a bunch of snooty women and having to make small talk with some bimbo for the duration of a coloring session. Especially when you have to talk over all the sounds and loud music, it's like hell for me and I've had more than one shutdown in places like this.

The Aveda salon I was going to was not like that at all, and my stylist is now a friend and we had such great conversations sometimes I didn't pay attention to what she did to my hair (but it always came out great).

Hopefully my blathering here helps you.

Best of luck!