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Supernova008
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21 May 2011, 2:15 am

I strongly dislike them.
Be it with strangers, acquaintances, friends or family members, I dread the Good Bye Stage. Why do people seem to NEED to hug, kiss, shake hands with everyone before leaving? I feel especially awkward if someone else is leaving too, and they make all these "proper" Good Byes (hugs, shakes, kisses, etc.), and I just say "Bye" awkwardly and go. In theory, I know what to do, but I just can't. Does anyone else feel this way about Good Byes?



MDD123
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21 May 2011, 2:39 am

I feel exactly the same way, sometimes it feels like people need some kind of build-up for a proper goodbye to take place, I really don't understand the process either and there's no efficient way to deal with it without offending someone. This is one of the reasons I've changed majors from nursing, they're expected to have impeccible manners and those manners could keep me tied up to one patient for way longer than what is practical.



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21 May 2011, 2:52 am

Supernova008 wrote:
I strongly dislike them.
Be it with strangers, acquaintances, friends or family members, I dread the Good Bye Stage. Why do people seem to NEED to hug, kiss, shake hands with everyone before leaving? I feel especially awkward if someone else is leaving too, and they make all these "proper" Good Byes (hugs, shakes, kisses, etc.), and I just say "Bye" awkwardly and go. In theory, I know what to do, but I just can't. Does anyone else feel this way about Good Byes?


As it happens I'm really uncomfortable with good-bye hugs unless they include a kiss on the cheek. (Nope, I don't understand this either.)

All of the good byes you mentioned involve direct physical contact of some sort. Is this the aspect of "good bye manners" that you dislike?



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21 May 2011, 4:26 am

I just say I need to get going and bye or see you later or see ya. I never hug or kiss anyone when I say good bye. But unless they want a hug, I give it. Same as if they want a kiss. I don't like it but I do it to get it over with.


I actually took you literal at first about saying good bye because I thought you meant people saying "Good bye" until I read your whole OP. :lol: But you only meant psychical stuff people have to do when they leave.



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21 May 2011, 4:32 am

I am okay with some of the goodbye rituals. What I really dislike is when people are preparing to leave and they do this by standing around and talking some more for several more minutes.



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21 May 2011, 4:33 am

Haha. The goodbye procedure of my family used to be like this:
"Oh your going, oh it was so nice to see you, i hope everything goes well with <insert some topic i mentioned>, we really must do <insert event we'll never do>, i guess i'll see you at <insert next family event i'm likely to get dragged into>, oh don't forget <insert something i haven't forgotten>, did you look at the garden? oh you must come look at the garden. it'll only take a minute." FUUUU. Then after looking at the garden the goodbye procedure begins again.

Although i've mostly managed to amend the procedure nowadays to:
"Bye everybody", waves hand and off i go. So much better.



Supernova008
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21 May 2011, 4:41 am

AngelKnight wrote:
All of the good byes you mentioned involve direct physical contact of some sort. Is this the aspect of "good bye manners" that you dislike?


League_Girl wrote:
I actually took you literal at first about saying good bye because I thought you meant people saying "Good bye" until I read your whole OP. :lol: But you only meant psychical stuff people have to do when they leave.


Yeah, I guess I only mean the physical stuff. I don't really care about the words "Good Bye", I just simply don't know what to do during the act. People hug, kiss, wish each other good luck (not a physical aspect as you see), but I find it all superfluous and I don't know what to do when I am part of a bigger group where everyone is doing that.



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21 May 2011, 5:46 am

Leaving is my least favorite part of going somewhere. For me, it's not the handshaking or the hugging; I can deal with all that. It's trying to figure out when I can leave. For example, I love my girlfriend's parents. We all get along splendidly. However, I hate going over to their house because I just can't figure out how to leave properly. If I try to leave too soon, I risk coming across as rude. And there have been a few times when I've waited too long and her dad had to sorta kick us out. My solution to this is to always try to have "something I gotta get done."



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21 May 2011, 6:39 am

When leaving anywhere I tend to either just disappear without any goodbyes, or I give an awkward wave and "seeya later". The people that matter to me know that is just me and they are accustomed to it.
I really dislike the kiss thing and the hug thing, unless it's my partner or my son.

I tend not to visit people unless I'm invited, because I feel like I'm intruding, and I usually don't stay very long. I think I have offended people by leaving too early. I think I don't like staying too long because I assume they have things to do. I hate it when you have visitors and they stay for ages and you can't get stuff done because you have to "entertain" them (listen to them complaining)



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21 May 2011, 10:07 am

I thought you meant people saying goodbye for good at first, which i find very distressing, as for general goodbyes i don't like it when you don't think they are going to hug you then they kind of pounce on you 8O



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21 May 2011, 10:14 am

Verdandi wrote:
I am okay with some of the goodbye rituals. What I really dislike is when people are preparing to leave and they do this by standing around and talking some more for several more minutes.


This is what gets me.


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21 May 2011, 10:25 am

I don't like good byes, either. It's not the hugging and the handshakes, either. I get emotional when I have to say good bye to someone that I really like. I also get that way, if I lose a friend on the Internet. I cry off and for a couple days, and than I'm fine.


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21 May 2011, 10:33 am

League_Girl wrote:
I just say I need to get going and bye or see you later or see ya. I never hug or kiss anyone when I say good bye. But unless they want a hug, I give it. Same as if they want a kiss. I don't like it but I do it to get it over with.


I actually took you literal at first about saying good bye because I thought you meant people saying "Good bye" until I read your whole OP. :lol: But you only meant psychical stuff people have to do when they leave.


I took it literally as in Supernova008 was leaving Wrong Planet for some reason.


I dislike the ritual of saying goodbye or whatever.


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21 May 2011, 12:57 pm

I'm glad someone's posted this. Yes, I hate this bit too. We had a street party for the royal wedding and I dreaded the whole thing, but I did a lot to help (cooking, buying cakes, etc). The worst bit was when people were starting to leave and the neighbour who had taken charge of the organising was hugging, kissing and thanking everyone for coming. It felt really strange, as if it was her party, although I know she wasn't trying to take all of the credit. I just made an escape without saying anything. I'd been nipping in and out of my house all day, so I don't think anyone noticed.



draelynn
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21 May 2011, 1:27 pm

I'm more the 'see ya later.' type. I get fidgety and clearly uncomfortable if, after saying goodbye, it ends up being a long protracted process to actually leave. It's like they expect something more... I'm never sure what. I fail miserably here.

Say goodbye and then leave. Nice, simple and to the point.



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21 May 2011, 1:36 pm

Luckily, I rarely have any physical contact with people when saying goodbye, but generally they don't go too badly.


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