Is Aspergers an excuse for bad behavior?

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Should AS be an excuse for bad behavior?
Yes 10%  10%  [ 27 ]
Yes 11%  11%  [ 29 ]
no 36%  36%  [ 98 ]
no 44%  44%  [ 120 ]
Total votes : 274

btbnnyr
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08 Dec 2011, 6:27 pm

Some of these good behaviors, like taking into consideration the multifarious feelings of others, may not be possible for a person with ASD to do in real-time. There's no automatic processing at work, so you can either consciously take into consideration the multifarious feelings of others while saying and doing nothing else, or actually interact with others.



pensieve
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08 Dec 2011, 6:28 pm

trollock.


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08 Dec 2011, 6:54 pm

I answered "no" but it really depends.
Having AS is no excuse to start a fight or initiate bad behaviour, but sometimes accidentally insulting someone or defeding yourself is justifiable.

When I was in 7th grade there was this jackass kid who liked to bully others. Once he was walking past me he shoved me (discretely) but I could tell he was doing it to be mean. I defended myself by shoving him back trying to tell him to cut it out, but i shoved him way harder than intended and he fell over.



anneurysm
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08 Dec 2011, 6:59 pm

btbnnyr wrote:
What are the right behaviors anyway? I don't know which of my behaviors are bad behaviors. Some people may consider them bad, but others may not.


There's no easy answer to this question. Should have clarified this a little more...I am referring to situations where the person has realized a specific behaviour is inappropriate after a situation has occurred, and attempts to justify it by saying "I have AS" instead of telling the person *why* aspects of their AS made it seem like they weren't behaving badly on purpose.

Behaviours aren't necessarily good or bad, but they are instead defined by appropriateness depending on the situation.


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This misdiagnosis caused me significant stress, which lessened upon finding out the truth about myself from my current and past long-term psychiatrists - that I am a highly sensitive person but do not have an autism spectrum disorder

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Phonic
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08 Dec 2011, 7:07 pm

I voted Yes in principle - if only to oppose the rambles of voting No - because if there's anything people on this forum do it's forgive people, let people off or give them extra support because they have autism.

If autism can't be an excuse for bad behavior, why is it the reason for a lot of good behavior according to , well, a bunch of you? We do like to tout Albert Einstien as an aspie and ascribe at least some of his brilliance to autistic creativity, yet when we hear of an autistic doing something bad we'll immidiately jump in to remind everyone how it had nothing to do with autism.


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btbnnyr
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08 Dec 2011, 7:18 pm

A lot of autistic behaviors are interpreted as bad by people who have never experienced the causes of the behaviors.

Like meltdowns caused by sensory overload are interpreted as temper tantrums of a person (kid) being wilfully bad and doing it all on purpose. People who have never experienced the sensory overload don't understand why someone who does would have a meltdown.



btbnnyr
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08 Dec 2011, 7:20 pm

I don't think that there are many autistic people going around behaving badly on purpose and making the excuse that their behaviors are caused by autism.



anneurysm
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08 Dec 2011, 8:16 pm

btbnnyr wrote:
I don't think that there are many autistic people going around behaving badly on purpose and making the excuse that their behaviors are caused by autism.


I completely agree. That's not how many people view it though. On the internet at least, there seems to be a view that autistic people are purposefully behaving badly, and that saying they have AS is like a free pass to get away with it. I have heard variations of the following phrase repeatedly: "Asperger's is just a doctor's way of saying that you're an as*hole."


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Given a “tentative” diagnosis as a child as I needed services at school for what was later correctly discovered to be a major anxiety disorder.

This misdiagnosis caused me significant stress, which lessened upon finding out the truth about myself from my current and past long-term psychiatrists - that I am a highly sensitive person but do not have an autism spectrum disorder

My diagnoses - anxiety disorder, depression and traits of obsessive-compulsive disorder (all in remission).

I’m no longer involved with the ASD world.


anneurysm
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08 Dec 2011, 8:22 pm

Phonic wrote:
I voted Yes in principle - if only to oppose the rambles of voting No - because if there's anything people on this forum do it's forgive people, let people off or give them extra support because they have autism.

If autism can't be an excuse for bad behavior, why is it the reason for a lot of good behavior according to , well, a bunch of you? We do like to tout Albert Einstien as an aspie and ascribe at least some of his brilliance to autistic creativity, yet when we hear of an autistic doing something bad we'll immidiately jump in to remind everyone how it had nothing to do with autism.


Good point. What we have to remember is that it is a spectrum with a wide range of people...the ones that make huge contributions to society and those who do the opposite. What we shouldn't do is assume that, as a collective, we are perfect, and that there are some of us who have done some pretty shameful things.

If we assume we are all brilliant, we are autism supremacists...a position we need to avoid taking as this will make us seem arrogant by the rest of the world.


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Given a “tentative” diagnosis as a child as I needed services at school for what was later correctly discovered to be a major anxiety disorder.

This misdiagnosis caused me significant stress, which lessened upon finding out the truth about myself from my current and past long-term psychiatrists - that I am a highly sensitive person but do not have an autism spectrum disorder

My diagnoses - anxiety disorder, depression and traits of obsessive-compulsive disorder (all in remission).

I’m no longer involved with the ASD world.


Ganondox
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08 Dec 2011, 8:37 pm

I doubt there would be many people with AS who would use it as an excuse like Sugar Motta from Glee, as the reason aspies come off as rude is by accident and they are often embarrassed when they realize what they said is offensive. Accidental behaviors should be excused, at least to a certain extent.


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08 Dec 2011, 8:40 pm

SyphonFilter wrote:
No. AS is an explanation for the way you do things, but never an excuse.

^this^

AS is as much of a free pass to bad behavior as are PMS and clinical depression.


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TheygoMew
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08 Dec 2011, 9:04 pm

People who state AS is just an excuse for bad behavior often times don't have AS themselves.

People who also say "because of my aspergers" often when caught lying or hurting other people but clearly showing no true remorse over their actions usually don't have AS either.

If you really have autism you would know that you don't get a free pass and often times people will NOT leave you alone when you need to be left alone.

Not sure if anyone else has been through this. You are trying to contain a meltdown from becoming a full on meltdown. You leave a bad situation to calm yourself down alone but people follow you into your space and keep bombarding you with unpleasant words, unpleasant tones and you really need to be left alone. Criticizing your behavior, telling you that you are stupid and you'll never amount to anything.

It is very rare someone can put themselves in my position meanwhile others expect that of me constantly and when I can't do that, all hell breaks loose.



CockneyRebel
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08 Dec 2011, 9:35 pm

Asperger's Syndrome shouldn't be an excuse for bad behaviour and the ones who think that it should be, put the rest of us to shame.


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09 Dec 2011, 1:28 am

anneurysm wrote:
btbnnyr wrote:
I don't think that there are many autistic people going around behaving badly on purpose and making the excuse that their behaviors are caused by autism.


I completely agree. That's not how many people view it though. On the internet at least, there seems to be a view that autistic people are purposefully behaving badly, and that saying they have AS is like a free pass to get away with it. I have heard variations of the following phrase repeatedly: "Asperger's is just a doctor's way of saying that you're an as*hole."



I have lurked on childfree forums and I saw one of them say people use Asperger's to be an as*hole and say whatever they want. Today on another childfree forum, lot of users there seem to think there is no such thing as the autism spectrum and high functioning autism and parents are just getting their kids diagnosed with it so they can excuse their behavior and not look like bad parents. So they have a term for that autism they don't think exists.


I still don't think it's an excuse because excuse means let them do whatever they want and not teach them any appropriate behavior and not take them out of places when they have a meltdown. Heck if Temple Grandin's autism were used as an excuse, she wouldn't be where she is now because her mother would have done her a disservice.

I think people confuse excuse for explanation or understanding.



Last edited by League_Girl on 09 Dec 2011, 4:14 am, edited 1 time in total.

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09 Dec 2011, 2:38 am

It can be a reason for inappropriate behavior in the context of the disorder itself. Said behavior will be listed in the psychology textbooks (meaning there'll be evidence to support it).

Unfortunately, ASDs do primarily manifest social and emotional dysfunction in regards to how others will view the individual with it; it's really hard to distinguish between being a jerk and not actually being aware of how others will perceive what you say. However, this is where evidence comes in, and if a whole heap of people with an ASD behave in such a way, whereas those without don't, we can see what's the disorder and what's simple personality.



hardyboyz1999
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05 May 2012, 9:37 pm

Autism should be an excuse unless it causes someone to commit an act of violence or stealing. I have Aspergers and I would not want someone to physically attack me or steal something from me. I was told that I can be arrested for harassment if I ask people personal questions or favors, but these people I ask act like they're cool with it. If someone asked me something I don't like, I would be direct and tell them "I would not be comfortable with that," but I would not call the police, unless they kept asking me. As the WWE wrestler Triple H said just before the Survivor Series in November 2000 "you are all fools, you are all living a lie," and "Even now, you think you know the truth, the truth is you still don't know," I would say the same thing about the neurotypical crowd. I know the truth (even if the neurotypical crowd doesn't) and the truth will set me free. Yet I still have to obey their stupid rules.