Care more about inanimate objects than people

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faerie_queene87
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12 Jan 2012, 6:02 pm

I definitely don't care more about stuff than I do about people... but it might appear the opposite, as I get very, VERY upset if something happens to my stuff while I usually don't get upset/sad/angry/whatever about people.

My opinion is that the difference between the two instances lies in the boundary of the self, and the concept of belonging or possession. My things belong to me, while my friends or relatives don't.

My things and personal space are some sort of "extension" of my self, so, while I don't really care about the things per se, I do care about the exclusive right to use and dispose of them. Violating that right is, for me, close to not considering me as a distinct and worthy human being.

If someone hurts a person I care about, or this person is taken away from me for some reason, I don't have the same reaction, because it has nothing to do with my sense of self. I might be worried, or disappointed, or even sad, but certainly not angry or threatened.


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antonblock
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12 Jan 2012, 6:43 pm

mj1 wrote:
Is it normal for people with AS to care more about inanimate objects than people? Like if an Aspie was in a car accident, would they care (and would it be normal) more about their personal belongings that were damaged than the other people in the accident?


i think this is a common misinterpretation, which is wrong! Many autistics care more about everything: they care more about inanimate objects, e.g. they don't want to change their cars as often as others, because they "like" their car.... i have a nice frog teddy.... i like him too .... :-))... but that doesn't mean that we like inanimate things more than people.

inanimate objects are more easy to handle, ok..... and autistics get easily stressed, for example because they are more sensitive, and thus get hurt more easily. And they feel more intense but can't express it, or express it differently. Thus it appears to non-autistics that they don't care, or care only about inanimate objects.... but thats wrong, just a nightmare fiction thing.....


best regards,

anton



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17 Jul 2012, 11:30 am

PurpleOctober wrote:
I don't know that I care MORE about inanimate objects than people like my family or few close friends, for instance. However, I do tend to "love" inanimate objects (especially stuffed animals) far more easily than I even connect with other people.


Yes, yes, that's exactly how I feel about it, too...inanimate objects are simply easier to relate to, since they have none of the facilities to demand, criticize, backstab, and withhold love that humans do.


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17 Jul 2012, 11:36 am

I do get bothered if I lose important inanimate objects...but I wouldn't say I care most about inanimate objects when it comes down to it I probably care a lot more about animals and or people close to me.


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17 Jul 2012, 12:14 pm

lonerespite wrote:
on an interview for a course in documentary film-making (which i had initially thought was a cultural studies course), i blurted out that i prefer taking photographs of objects than people, i told them that the whole idea of capturing someone while they are aware of it does not make that much sense to me, though actually im not really comfortable dealing with people while taking pics cause i can never know what to say, or how to manage them, objects just make more sense to me, i can manipulate them better. well that got me rejected. but yeah generally im more at home with the things around me, more peaceful it is...


When my two older children were babies, I got the sneaking suspicion that I liked the photos I took of them better than the actual kids. That sounds horrible, I know. And if I had to throw my camera or my knitting in a river to save the kids, I'd not hesitate an instant--for my kids or anyone else's.



DrPenguin
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17 Jul 2012, 12:56 pm

I tend to use objects as replacement to animals (rent so not allowed a pet) sitting here occasionally stroking my PC as it needs a reinstall and being a little flakey. I've been told i prefer animals (and by association objects) more than people (which I do in most cases as there easier to understand (and possibly more intelligent than some people (although knowing some of the people I do this could be said for the objects)) but if I had to choose between a person or an object I'd save the person. I've risked my life to save complete strangers without a second thought, but a choice between an animal I love and a stranger...that would be a hard one.


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outofplace
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17 Jul 2012, 1:26 pm

I did when I was younger. I cared more about my family than objects, but probably put equal weight to objects that I put to other people who were not involved in my life. Even now, I do not like taking pictures with people in them and prefer objects and landscapes instead. However, now I do care a lot about other people as I have learned to do so.


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Shroomy
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18 Jul 2012, 9:02 am

Joe90 wrote:
In every object I seem to see a ''soul''. If I hear someone complaining about an object, I picture the object in my mind and see ''hurt feelings'' on the object. It gives a ''hey what have I done to you?'' expression. And if somebody wants to throw an object across the room, the poor object can't stop them, then will be broken. And the object is probably screaming out, ''hey, I wasn't manufactered for that! Show a little respect, please!''

I know most children see a ''soul'' in some objects, mostly things like teddies or other toys that have eyes. I remember when my cousin was 3 he had a big tantrum when his mother put his teddy in the washing-machine, and wouldn't get over it for hours. That's typical. :roll: :D But somehow I haven't grew out of this. Although I wouldn't throw a tantrum over something like this, I would still become hesitant if I went to throw one of my teddies in the washing-machine, and then run off to do something to take my mind off of it while he's in the washing-machine. :D


I'm like that too. I feel deeply upset when an object gets broken, I don't know why. I also feel sad when objects don't get put to any use cos I feel they're lonely. I feel a lot of empathy for inanimate objects.

I get very attached to some of my things. However I put a greater value on an animal's life or another person's life. I love people close to me like my family much more than I love any of my things though, there is no doubt about that.

My calculator has a cover that can slip onto the front or the back. When I did my A level exams, I forgot to remove the cover so I had to hand it in at the front to collect it later. However I had extra time and was one of the last to collect my calculator cover. Mine was gone. I was distraught. My teacher gave me hers later when I had calmed down and I thanked her but it just wasn't the same. I'm kind of growing attached to it now though. True story. :lol:



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18 Jul 2012, 9:52 am

Hmm, I think I care about objects the same as I do with people. But if people are able enough to escape a building on fire, I feel more sorry for the objects left behind, since objects are innocent and helpless, just like small children, elderly people, disabled people, and animals.

The other day a boarding school had burnt down, and nobody was injured or killed but I kept on worrying if there was any teddies left behind. It was a boy's boarding school who weren't too little, so hopefully they wouldn't bring teddies to boarding school *laughs nervously in hope that that's right*.


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18 Jul 2012, 4:18 pm

mj1 wrote:
Is it normal for people with AS to care more about inanimate objects than people?
Does food count?



Jasmine90
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18 Jul 2012, 4:27 pm

I care more about my things than people. But not my animals, I would happily sacrifice everything of mine if it means my animals are safe & happy.