Good social skills are about being a good liar/pretender

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Sweets
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24 May 2013, 1:07 am

qawer wrote:
Sweets wrote:
I think you're close OP but I think you took a wrong turn by implying it's inherently dishonest. I prefer to think of it as "acting" rather than "lying" - if you're doing it right, the other person knows what's really going on and they don't at all mind.


I know what you mean. I can just find it offending that people often will exploit it if you don't really know what's going on (due to autism for instance). It is a way of "sorting out the weak", and you are supposed to also sort out those who don't get your "acting". I'm just not fond of social status games in general. The weak need help, not sorting out.

The more you do it yourself, the less you mind. If you have AS and don't do it at all, you mind a lot. I see that's how it works.


Yeah, you're right. I don't think the "sorting out the weak" effect is deliberate, though.



EnglishJess
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24 May 2013, 6:03 am

The way I see it, I have to pretend I'm a nice person, act polite (Well, I can say please and thankyou, I'm talking about using a clother to wipe myself instead of my hands when eating and that kind of stuff), and talk in a bright sounding voice which is put on simply for show. Hardly me at all.