Do you feel the need to be secretive about your plans?

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burnt_orange
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23 Feb 2017, 11:55 pm

I don't mean anything sinister. Just plans in general, or even where you're going today, your hopes and dreams, what you want for dinner, anything.

I'm always secretive and people don't understand it and I don't even understand it all the time, but I think I fear the bad reactions people will have, even if it's nothing negative. Or that their comments will ruin my day or my plans.

Sometimes I try to tell people things but I always regret it. Does anyone else do this and have some perspective on it or some solutions? People have commented on it before. I usually just smile and they think I'm crazy.



PaperMajora
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24 Feb 2017, 1:27 am

Well I don't actually know if I have autism but I've found myself finding it much easier to just do things. For example if I say I'm going to cook something SUDDENLY someone else will need to use the kitchen or if I want to go somewhere, I'l suddenly be needed for something. The problem to this, is that by not telling people they will go ahead and do things and interfere since they didn't even know they were interfering in the first place. As for telling people things, I usually will tell them my aspirations if the conversation calls for it, though I can't help but feel people will role their eyes if I actually told ALL the things I want to accomplish.


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nurseangela
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24 Feb 2017, 2:34 am

Nope. I hate secrets. My problem is being too open. The problem with that is I also expect others to be just as open and when they are not, I think they are hiding something.

A part of me wonders if my being too open scares people away, but I don't understand the reason for hiding things, so I don't.

I have regretted telling too much information about myself to other people who aren't so open because it's like giving a part of you away showing you trust them enough to do so, but they don't reciprocate so to me it's like they don't trust me enough to open up about themselves.


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SaveFerris
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24 Feb 2017, 6:30 am

I wouldn't go as far as secretive but I am guarded


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Edna3362
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24 Feb 2017, 6:44 am

I would rather want to be secretive about anything.

I've been inventing secret codes and building hiding places even as a child. I hate it when people talks about me or knowing where I'm going or what I'm doing...

Or what I could or wouldn't do, or what I do or do not have...


Surrounded by worrywarts, people who expects and assumes do not help.
Lastly, I expect people to take things the wrong way or won't understand, and simply conclude that people do not need to know.


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IstominFan
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24 Feb 2017, 9:58 am

I don't mind telling people of my plans, but I do have to be careful. If things don't work out, I could wind up embarrassed or disappointed.



SmallBun
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24 Feb 2017, 10:46 am

nurseangela wrote:
My problem is being too open. The problem with that is I also expect others to be just as open and when they are not, I think they are hiding something.


I honestly can't express how much I can relate to this. :o


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kraftiekortie
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24 Feb 2017, 10:50 am

I don't like nosy people.

I'm a pretty open person most of the time, though.



C2V
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24 Feb 2017, 10:59 am

I'm very secretive. But it is primarily because I have extremely intrusive and overbearing and controlling people in my life. If I wasn't secretive, I would have no personal privacy whatsoever. I'm only responding against the level of encroachment I get. Perhaps that is a factor for you also.


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The Unleasher
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24 Feb 2017, 4:49 pm

Yes, I do. Whenever I opened up about them in the past, no one really cared. I just stopped trying.


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