Consequence's to untreated aspergers?

Page 1 of 2 [ 25 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

TallyMan
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Mar 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 40,061

28 May 2008, 3:13 am

Actually I think the original poster is very luck to have been diagnosed. I'm of the generation that only recently discovered that Aspergers is the cause of why my entire life has been spent as a round peg in a square hole - in lots of different ways. At least knowing the cause you can get advice and counselling from others to help you lead a happier life. My life has been spent with periods of chronic depression and I never knew why until recently. I think some sort of counselling would have helped me enormously over the years and would probably have stopped me making some really bad decisions in my life. As it is I've just muddled through.



SotiCoto
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2008
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 474
Location: London

28 May 2008, 3:19 am

NextFact wrote:
no, hell no, i dont believe anything positive can come of this disorder, i find myself suicidal sometimes.

I'm not sure whether I want more to punch you for saying something so ridiculous.... or to rip the throats out of every neurotypical who made you feel this way.

You... are a wreck.
A wreck of a person.

And it is NOT because you are Aspergian. It is because the mundies around you have left you feeling this way. You have not been allowed to utilise your strengths, and have set you standards that are not in any way appropriate to your strengths. They have laid ridiculous expectations on you for social interaction, as suit their backwards, devolved standards... and left you feeling destroyed on the inside for not being able to live up to them.


Being Aspergian is not to be "cured"..... no more than modern humans can be "cured" back into Australopithicines. It is an enhanced state of mental specialisation, without so much emphasis on all that ridiculous social crap.
As such, it is about time you pulled yourself together and learnt to deal with who you are.... learnt to take advantage of the gift you were born with, and put aside the ridiculous expectations of neurotypical society.
You can be BETTER than this... better than them. Don't ever let them get you down just because you can't play their asinine social games.


.
.
.



robinhood
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 27 May 2008
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 289
Location: UK

28 May 2008, 3:36 am

Hey, I'm 32 and just going through the diagnostic process now. I knew for about 6 years but just didn't want to do anything about it, and just carry on with my so-called life. I understand where you are coming from, I think. I thought i was doing just fine until a few weeks ago. Now I feel like all the tricks I was using to fit in were a sham. I'm so exhausted from putting a front on my whole life I don't want to talk to anyone really.

But I guess it'll pass, right? Somewhere in the future I'm going to be glad I know this, because it's going to help me choose the right situations to be in. I dunno, sometimes I think "I wish I didn't know this", and in a way I'm glad I didn't get "labelled" as a kid, even though it really hurt growing up. I wish I lived in a world where other people knew what AS was without going on some kind of trip about it. Maybe if that was the case, then I wouldn't have such a trip myself. But that's a story for another day.

You don't have to be brave and "pull yourself together", or all that c***. God, I've had enough of people telling me that. But just try and survive the next few months. Let yourself get used to the idea. You have a purpose down here on WrongPlanet, like we all do. You just have to find out what it is.

When I was 17 I tried to commit suicide. Fortunately it didn't work, although I was really disappointed at the time. But however I'm feeling right now about AS, my life since then has been full of adventures, crazy moments, and even the occasional amazing friend. Some of it has been lonely and f***ing miserable it's true, but a lot of it has been fantastic, in a very weird kind of way.... A mega learning curve of an experience, for sure.

Stick around, you might grow to like it, believe it or not. You might grow to admire your own abilities to survive - to be proud of them. You'll get your confidence back, even if you feel like you've been punched in the stomach right now. Some people will accept you, they already did. Some people will think you're the greatest thing, although you'll never believe they mean it. The thing is, we just gotta accept ourselves, isn't it?



Josie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Apr 2008
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 607

30 May 2008, 12:17 am

You'll be fine. I am going to go through the DX process. I have the same problem with the sunlight issue.. I sneeze when I see the sun and squint... it drives me crazy.



Greentea
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jun 2007
Age: 62
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,745
Location: Middle East

30 May 2008, 12:40 am

SotiCoto wrote:
And it is NOT because you are Aspergian. It is because the mundies around you have left you feeling this way. You have not been allowed to utilise your strengths, and have set you standards that are not in any way appropriate to your strengths. They have laid ridiculous expectations on you for social interaction, as suit their backwards, devolved standards... and left you feeling destroyed on the inside for not being able to live up to them. Being Aspergian is not to be "cured"..... no more than modern humans can be "cured" back into Australopithicines. It is an enhanced state of mental specialisation


I'm making a poster with this text. Wisest words ever spoken to an Aspie. If you look closely, this text also contains all the life advice an Aspie should get and the maxims Aspies should live by (and I'm speaking from half a century of experience):

- Sentence 2: Never define yourself by how NTs see you, define yourself by your own standards
- Sentence 3: Develop your life so, that you make sure you can utilize your strengths (so you don't forget your worth)
- Sentence 4: Never set your social goals according to NTs' definition of social success
- Sentences 5 + 6: Train yourself into the habit of reminding yourself, each time you're rejected, that you're not flawed but different from the majority.

I believe if I'd lived by these, I would've had the confidence to use my energies to develop myself instead of fight and berate myself and I would've reached success.


_________________
So-called white lies are like fake jewelry. Adorn yourself with them if you must, but expect to look cheap to a connoisseur.


SotiCoto
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2008
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 474
Location: London

30 May 2008, 4:51 am

Greentea wrote:
I'm making a poster with this text. Wisest words ever spoken to an Aspie.

Great to have your approval, teatree-froggie, though it was a bit of a rant on my part.
Every time I see the title of this thread, I nearly snap the pen I'm holding in half through barely suppressed outrage. And yes, I'm always holding a pen... twiddling with it, twisting it, working it between my fingers, spinning it in my mouth... whatever.



Greentea
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jun 2007
Age: 62
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,745
Location: Middle East

30 May 2008, 6:12 am

Every time I see the title of this thread I get the outrage of my decades of """"treatment"""" and all my money wasted on nothing.


_________________
So-called white lies are like fake jewelry. Adorn yourself with them if you must, but expect to look cheap to a connoisseur.


5thelement
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 24 May 2008
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 62
Location: the edge of the sea - england

30 May 2008, 7:07 am

Quote:
Quote:
Great to have your approval, teatree-froggie, though it was a bit of a rant on my part.
Every time I see the title of this thread, I nearly snap the pen I'm holding in half through barely suppressed outrage.


Sotico - you have my approval as well - and i have similar feelings of anger/rage /rant - they are high at the moment as I'm sort of 'transitioning' - i reject so much of the 'nt' world and am going through the phase of seeing how I have had to try to fit in in order to survive - and I mean really survive. I do feel angry and confused, and I'm not very good at explaining all sorts of things that I wish to post and discuss on this forum - or rather I should say - it's clear in my head but getting it out is difficult to express in words at the moment.

How come thesre 'nt' s seem to run everything when they seem so shallow / unaware - why have a lot of us ended up so unhappy when it seems to me that we are so able, intelligent and on the ball - how did this repression happen - sheer weight of numbers? - I think this rhetorical - as i know the answer ( or rather I have my own answer) - it justs upset me :(



craola
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 20 Mar 2008
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 260

30 May 2008, 7:43 am

A lot of people here speak a lot of sense.
I have attempted suicide, 5 or 6 times, I self harmed, half of body is scarred for life, I had a total break down, I'm on so much medication I can't function properly on my own.
Then I found out I was possibly on the Autistic Spectrum.
I've already been diagnosed with several mental health disorders but none made that much sense to me, then I read a bit about AS and it was like this huge light-bulb was switched on in my head.
If I get diagnosed with Aspergers it will be like being let out of a cage.
There will be reason for why I am why I am, I won't be a freak, or a weirdo or whatever else I have been called and I have come to believe.
I am holding on to this assessment more than anything else in the world at the moment!

Ok, so there are the not so great aspects, hypersensitive to touch, sound, I eat hardly any foods and I really struggle socially to name a few, but that just makes me unique, and so much more of a person than I have lived with the past 20 years of life.
Its not treatment that you need, its understanding and learning.
If you feel suicidal you should see someone, definitely. If you see an Aspie specialist they could really help you to understand yourself and help you to find ways of coping with things you find difficult and overcoming these feelings.



mysterious_misfit
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 353

30 May 2008, 7:55 am

Everything seems really dramatic when you are 17, but in a few years, you will wonder why you got so worked up about it. You may want to get treatment for your depression, but I don't know if there is any really effective 'treatment' for AS. I am 26 years old and only recently found out about AS. So I never had treatment, and I am really doing fine. I have a college degree, a job, a spouse, and two kids. I also have a handful of friends, draw and paint as a hobby, and own a house. I'm not bothered by social drama or people talking sh!t about me (which they have recently). I know I'm doing the best I can, and I'm doing the right things for my family, and that's all that matters to me.