How have you dealt with your anger?

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I've dealt with some of my anger.

Anger with women who don't make it clear my advances are unwanted and/or rebuffed. I realise women have reasons for silence or otherwise (fear, misunderstanding, being advised to not respond, this is how they've been taught to respond), I remind myself this, I control myself and communicate to understand their position. Counseling helps too.

Anger with a student who attacked me at school with a knife. Counseling has helped me to work through this old emotion. I now seem to be in a "bargaining" phase. I may need to contact this person (by mediator) and seek acknowledgment from them that the past event actually happened and was wrong. That simple acknowledgment of reality would help me alot.

I pwn n0obs

I don't seem to have the facility to feel anger. I have no idea what it's like to actually be angry. I've been annoyed before, or upset, but nothing I have ever felt seems to have matched the desciption of anger. I worry about this, but at least it means that if I get overloaded I don't tend to have a loud melt down which is helpful at work.
Does being angry relieve you of stress? I get very stressed.

Anger is the only really strong feeling i get, it is imposible to control, I just tend to self descruct/meltdown. I need to shut myself away from everyone when it happens, I dont get violent with others but I have hurt myself, I broke my hand punching the floor about 1 yrs ago.

I do not generally deal with anger well. I either shut down, shake angrly and hands clenched, or explode.

The best way i deal with anger is i make a joke about it.

I discovered something shocking about my parents in the last week. Well, I think I should be shocked and angry, but after sleeping on it I feel fine. Maybe part of me expected it...

Recently an anger pychiatrist told me that anger can be controlled (and assessed by taking personality tests, not the MBTI, but the more professional ones as Rocharsh type tests, a bit costly unfortunately) by several ways... including heavy medications.

If family, or any one causes sever anger, i shun them away from my life. A person angered me 10 yrs ago havent spoken since. Another, I decided to regain contact after 18 yrs, as sometimes shunning i pointless.

Just to say since 4 months ago i noticed (and actually decided) that I :
- refuse orders from people under me, or at my level (work)
- don't tolerate people who think they want to insist to do smthng I dont want to do, or cant
- give unwanted advice and dare say it for my own good (they can shove it where I think)
- and other details that NT assume we can/cant do...
- worst, in my opinion is AS ppl assume to be NT and behave ike 'em, to me it is as if they sold thir souls to the devil...


Will update on what the Dr. says

- Tried deanxit for anger, makes me drowsy and sleepy, so on days where ifeel like s**t after an anger outburst, the 10 next days are zombie like after gulping that....... forgetting life by drus aint the solution,

- Will try the B12, D or other vitamins (anger does tone down with sun exposure, indeed, tried it) but the medications anti anger and depressions are usually strong (like epileptc doses) and genrally are overkill......

- Lamictal 25mg..... Or Ritalin, vallium ??mg seems like strong stuff.
St John's wartor other homeopathic equivalents can release bad stress (as does accupuncture)

WILL update on this, but food can help they say, ... *
*but if family Has AS and we do and communication is with lightsabers then there ain't no solutions to the crises.....
(many people tell me if you aint part of the solution, you're part of the problem, indeed in out case *all those who say this are well part of our anger problem, even us)

for humorous tones:
- I usually borrow names of sith lords when i enter forums, chtboards etc as my dark side takes over, I used to take jedi names before, but i fee more like sith lords esp towards NT ppl or those whom I feel seek harm, or whose intentions re not cloear, or seem to put down more the hole rther than get me out (but it is mot the guy who gets us out of the hole who has our interet at stake)...
- watching Hawai 5-0, CSI, Law & order, Scorpion, NCIS usually relaxes me. (i get relaxed seeing interrogtors doing their jobs and harrassing the recalcitrant prisonners/inmates to get their questions answered, even it means torturing thir minds like When sith lords intimidate their opponents during lightsaber duels)

I understand that completely. I have problems and disconnects with processing all of my emotions. Most of the time with anger I internalize it and then just get more and more despondent and depressed until I explode on someone- which doesn't make me feel any better. Then I just guilt trip about going off on someone.

I'm also a notorious delayed reactor, especially with strong emotions such as anger or grief. I know that I'm angry or sad when the event that makes me angry or sad happens, but only on a sort of surface level. I don't just automatically process it, and I normally don't feel emotions in real time. The reaction may take days, weeks or even decades to come to the surface, usually at a most inopportune time. I've been known to be completely deadpan at a funeral or wake of a loved one, but fall apart in an unlikely place with no real explanation a week or a month or even years later. Being on meds (Prozac and Catapres) has helped with the intensity of emotions but not with the delayed reaction or the disconnect in general.

The best thing I can do with emotion is to write about it, to make myself actually put the way I feel into words so I can process it. This is probably easier for me because I'm hyperlexic. I understand and internalize the written word better than any other form of communication. If I have to organize my thoughts and emotions in writing I can see it and better deal with it.

When I was in counseling several years ago, my psychologist gave me a list of "emotion words" that are sometimes helpful for me to glance through when I am trying to identify and describe what I'm feeling. For me, if I name the emotion it helps me start processing it. The bad thing is that in the heat of anger or grief I lose my connection to words- I hit a sort of nameless, wordless void where I lose any eloquence I ever thought I had. Many times if I am experiencing extreme emotions, I completely lose the ability to form words or to even speak at all.

It's necessary for me to get time away from people every now and then, where I can just think and read and be without having to participate in the social dance. That downtime helps me to stay on an even keel and to deal with things a little bit at a time instead of being buried in them. Some days are better than others. Age and time and experience help, too.

Very poorly.
I've tried a few different therapists and it doesn't seem to help. I've discussed it with a few psychiatrists and ended up medicating for it. Medication helps quite a bit, for which I am grateful, but I unfortunately still have occasional hot flashes. I'm better at letting the anger subside these days as well, so that is very helpful. I just hate how I'll get upset over nothing and lash out at people I love.
Good luck and stay safe.

I hesitate to reply, since my angers pale in comparison to some I read here. (Although my youthful self would probably disagree - time smooths everything out.) When I was younger I repressed anger - I come from a good, passive-aggressive family.

Of course, in the odd times when the anger slipped out, it knew not its limits - I would often say the worst thing I could think of about someone; or very rarely, break something.

These days, I give my anger more respect. If I'm angry, I'll tell people. The part I work the hardest on is finding ways to express the full, flavorful continuum of anger. Sometimes a pointed tease works well; other times it is a direct look and a serious voice. With the kids, a raised voice often leaves quite an impression.

I also very much agree with those who suggest serious exercise - martial arts, gym, biking, etc. When your body learns how to handle that stress, it becomes better at handling other kinds of stress as well. (I sadly admit that I currently need to practice what I preach, in this area.)

Why is it after you post a question, you then find other answers to that question in an older thread or just a different section of the forums?

Elysian 1969- the letting it build up then exploding on an innocent bystander and the delayed reaction really speak to my stuff. Some of the key then is figuring out exactly what the emotion is and then processing it?

Domanite- how long did it take for you to get from "anger slipped out, it knew not its limits" to "These days, I give my anger more respect." ?