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HowlingMad1992
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11 Jan 2010, 3:30 pm

At college while I was waiting for a taxi, I got talking to this girl who was waiting for the same taxi I was. After we both got to the other campus in which we needed to be, we both waited in line to put our names down on a list so that we could get a taxi back. As she said bye to me, I put my name down on the list before having a look at her name. When I got back home later today I added her on facebook, in which she approved the request. After that I talked to her for a little while on facebook chat before she had to go. Going back to why I have made this thread, do you think that I'm a bit strange/stalker like for checking up her name without asking her? I feel strange by doing it but she doesn't seem to mind.



heatherbabes
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11 Jan 2010, 4:08 pm

I would not at all mind if a guy did that to me. And since she accepted your request, obviously she doesn't mind either.

I once had a guy use my employment application to get my phone number and name to call me for a date. I valued his creativity :)



leschevalsroses
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11 Jan 2010, 4:11 pm

I would probably be a little creeped out if a guy did that to me, but I guess it depends what kind of conversation you had and how well you hit it off with her. If you felt a good connection with her during the conversation I wouldn't worry about it. Plus she accepted your request so she couldn't have been too creeped out by it.



willa
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11 Jan 2010, 7:49 pm

I dont know if I would find it creepy, but I would definitely take that as a sign that the person thought we hit it off and had some kind of interest in me. It may be a sign she thought as much too, ask her out for some coffee or lunch, not a dinner date, but something casual.


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HowlingMad1992
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11 Jan 2010, 8:25 pm

leschevalsroses wrote:
I would probably be a little creeped out if a guy did that to me, but I guess it depends what kind of conversation you had and how well you hit it off with her. If you felt a good connection with her during the conversation I wouldn't worry about it. Plus she accepted your request so she couldn't have been too creeped out by it.


In general we were both discussing about how the taxi service is usually late, making us late for our lessons. Then I just asked her what she did at college and how long she would be in college for. I did make her laugh once or twice too.

willa wrote:
It may be a sign she thought as much too, ask her out for some coffee or lunch, not a dinner date, but something casual.


I probably would do but from her facebook profile she has a boyfriend so unfortunately that wouldn't work.



therange
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11 Jan 2010, 8:31 pm

do yourself a favor, delete her from your facebook, add her to the spank bank, and move on.



Hector
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11 Jan 2010, 8:51 pm

I wouldn't go that far, unfriending isn't very nice. But I wouldn't hold out much hope. Maybe by chance you'll meet each-other again and she'll still seem interested and won't be taken, but it's a bit of a long shot. Keep meeting new women.

Oh, and you did nothing wrong.



willa
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11 Jan 2010, 9:31 pm

ah, has a boyfriend. Well, in that case, she's probably just a friendly person, which is a good thing, just evaluate yourself, i assumed, based on the forum this was posted in, that you like her, in the 'like like' kind of way so are you the kind of person who will let that grow out of control just by talking to her and over-fantasizing things? Or can you manage a friendship with a friendly person? (aka, are you the kind of person who, in the past, has mistook acts of friendship as something more because from what little information we have of her i take it she's a friendly person and easy for a naive AS guy to get hung up on).


There's also the possibility she would be interested in a new relationship, in which case I would say stay away, there is always the chance her other relationship is ending and she's open to a new relationship, but I think in those situations more often than not someone like a guy with AS wont pick up on the signs that someone was just looking for a quick romp on the side and fall into the trap mentioned above. If you're willing to risk it, there is no harm in asking a girl out if she's got a boyfriend (the harm is if you've got a girlfriend :P), you can just play dumb about noticing the boyfriend thing. I would definitely say to her "can I take you out for some lunch one day" and not "want to meet up for lunch" or something similar. You've gotta word it so that it sounds like you want to take her out somewhere. The latter way can easily be just a friendly lunch and her saying yes wont mean a thing, but if you say to her "can i take you out to..." you'll get an immediate response of "oh, sorry, i've got a boyfriend" if she's in a serious relationship (unless she isnt NT and similarly naive, nothings certain in love and war :P )

But, i'm guessing she's just a friendly person. So no harm/no foul in talking to her, just dont get hung up over forbidden fruit.


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Mandi
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25 Jan 2010, 10:36 pm

I agree with most everyone. You did nothing wrong. It sounds like you two were hitting it off in the cab. But just because she has a boyfriend doesn't mean that you can' just be her friend and just talk to her on facebook. I don't think what you did was creepy. I wouldn't think of it that way if it would have been me. Just be her friend and if she was to become single and be more interested in you then thats always a good thing but don't get your hopes up and keep talking to other women.



hale_bopp
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26 Jan 2010, 12:15 am

Yeah I think thats a bit strange.

Its not like its a HUGE deal though... its not stalking just taking notice of things. She doesn't seem to care either so don't worry about it.



Aussie
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28 Jan 2010, 4:11 pm

That isnt strange or stalkerish at all. All it does is shows her you want to get to know her a little more. Since she accepted you she probably wamts to get to know you a little more too. (even if it is just as a friend)



TStrouse
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31 Jan 2010, 11:42 am

Not a all. I mean she probably remembered you and that's why she accepted your friend request on facebook. I even bet that she's probably happy that you did look on the list for her name so you guys can talk now.