sad I think I figured my parents out

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lightening020
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26 Apr 2010, 10:16 pm

My mom who I think has AS but she probably will never admit it or is in denial, married the first guy that went for her. The reason, I have never heard of her talking about previous boyfriends/relationships or actually anything of that nature before. She hides most of her past and depression. Im afraid iv inherited this trait I cant get rid of my perma-mask

My dad an NT late social bloomer who dealt with some inferiority. Heard of 1 previous girlfriend and thats probably it before he married my mom. Mabey at the most 1 or 2 other relationships.

From thinking about this stuff now this much adds up.

What about me: nothing..........what does this mean for me? that im doomed nomatter what I do. Im pretty much cursed.

to just go with the flow I think and most people just f**k up just like their parents did.

I feel like a bastard for writing about my parents (w/o them knowing) on the internet.



antique_toy
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26 Apr 2010, 11:27 pm

oh, i have written so much worse. a lot of people post about those freakin' parents of theirs. it's perfectly natural and there's no reason to feel bad about it.

your mom sounds just like my mom...my mom has this 'mask' too and she has always been depressed ever since she was a teenager. her whole life. she is a very closed person and won't have conversation with me beyond small talk. it is very frustrating! anything deeper i bring up is either 'too personal' or 'i don't think about those things, hunny. i don't know. *weirded out expression*. and it's not like the things i talk about are inappropriate... not for a mother and a daughter... i may not be an NT but i know that for sure.
anyway, my mom was dumped by almost every guy she dated, i think, and after she had practically given up, she settled for a crude, dirty, semi-crazy, abusive, controlling and (possibly autistic or schizophrenic?) homeless alcoholic man, my father. sigh.
but these parents of ours...they made us! that's one thing to be happy about.



LK
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27 Apr 2010, 6:21 pm

Regardless of the problems your parents may have had, it does not mean you are "doomed." Realizing the problems your parents have can help you recognize them in yourself and stop them before they get out of hand. People who just go with the first person who takes an interest in them usually have poor self esteem and confidence. If you think you have the problems your parent(s) had and that they are too difficult for you to handle on your own, you can seek out therapy or help in some other way.


_________________
While Mr. Kim... has fallen prey to the inexplicable need for human contact, let me step in and assure you that my research will go on uninterrupted, and that social relationships will continue to baffle and repulse me.
- Dr. Sheldon Cooper (TBBT)