do you find autistic girls attractive?

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Topher
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24 May 2008, 8:46 am

I dated an autistic girl for about 3 months, she was quite pretty and very sweet, she broke it off with me because she wanted to be single.



Tim_Tex
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24 May 2008, 10:39 am

The one I was interested in for the past year wanted to be single as well.


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24 May 2008, 12:43 pm

Depends how high or low functioning. If she's any lower functioning than the average aspie, then usually I don't find her attractive, and even if she is relatively high functioning certain little things can really turn me off. >.>

I knew a girl who was more medium-functioning autism in high school...while she wasn't stupid exactly (I'm sure she was very intelligent in some ways), I found her so naive and repulsive and irritating and giggly and immature and with an annoying as hell voice. (Think Spongebob's style of speaking, except her actual voice was different.) And to top it all off, she had a crush on me. So yeah...wasn't good. Classic example: in high school theatre class the kids were doing a skit in which a girl was being on trial for masturbating in class, and several of the other students were basically called up there pretending to be eye witnesses. The autistic girl was one of the "eye witnesses" and showed through her response that she clearly had no idea what masturbation was. And she was so gleeful in her ignorance. In another time we were playing charades, and when she went up she so completely misunderstood what she was supposed to be doing, but was still so gleeful and giggly about it. I find such...gleeful ignorance and immaturity to just be really icky.

With aspie girls it's hard to say. Oftentimes they have things that attract me to them--they're more likely to share interests with me than non-aspie girls, it seems, and I like the strangeness. But...and I hate to stereotype, but so many of them are so trapped in damage. While I can definitely be friends with someone who is as damaged and depressed as I, it's hard for me to be anything more in many cases because...someone who can't get themselves to change, to grow and mature, someone who doesn't have enough faith in their abilities to improve as a person if they try--that is someone I find hard to date, because whenever I ask her how her life is her response always makes me feel so miserable. How could I fall in love with someone like that? That would imply the most intense care I had, and that would make my well being dependent on her's--and she would always be damaged, always be sad. >.< Just having some issues or being depressed isn't what I mean, though...that's all fine...but someone who would never grow up without help...that's not appealing.



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24 May 2008, 4:44 pm

windscar15 wrote:
Be honest, guys.

I'm not saying there are no attractive autistic girls. There are certainly a lot of them that have great looks and great personalities.

Problem is, that the ones in my area are sheltered, unappealing, and very awkward.
There is one autistic girl I liked but she ended up going out with this Russian guy.

I've only ever met a few autistic women, and two that were close to my age. So I don't exactly have much to choose from. So I haven't really thought about it much, even though I can't imagine AS on its own being a turn-off for me. All the women I've ever really fancied to date as far as I'm aware don't have AS or autism in any form.



windscar15
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24 May 2008, 9:29 pm

Veresae wrote:
Depends how high or low functioning. If she's any lower functioning than the average aspie, then usually I don't find her attractive, and even if she is relatively high functioning certain little things can really turn me off. >.>

I knew a girl who was more medium-functioning autism in high school...while she wasn't stupid exactly (I'm sure she was very intelligent in some ways), I found her so naive and repulsive and irritating and giggly and immature and with an annoying as hell voice. (Think Spongebob's style of speaking, except her actual voice was different.) And to top it all off, she had a crush on me. So yeah...wasn't good. Classic example: in high school theatre class the kids were doing a skit in which a girl was being on trial for masturbating in class, and several of the other students were basically called up there pretending to be eye witnesses. The autistic girl was one of the "eye witnesses" and showed through her response that she clearly had no idea what masturbation was. And she was so gleeful in her ignorance. In another time we were playing charades, and when she went up she so completely misunderstood what she was supposed to be doing, but was still so gleeful and giggly about it. I find such...gleeful ignorance and immaturity to just be really icky.

With aspie girls it's hard to say. Oftentimes they have things that attract me to them--they're more likely to share interests with me than non-aspie girls, it seems, and I like the strangeness. But...and I hate to stereotype, but so many of them are so trapped in damage. While I can definitely be friends with someone who is as damaged and depressed as I, it's hard for me to be anything more in many cases because...someone who can't get themselves to change, to grow and mature, someone who doesn't have enough faith in their abilities to improve as a person if they try--that is someone I find hard to date, because whenever I ask her how her life is her response always makes me feel so miserable. How could I fall in love with someone like that? That would imply the most intense care I had, and that would make my well being dependent on her's--and she would always be damaged, always be sad. >.< Just having some issues or being depressed isn't what I mean, though...that's all fine...but someone who would never grow up without help...that's not appealing.


Dude, you pretty much took the words out of my mouth.
That's exactly how I feel.
The reason for me posting this thread is that at this stupid party for all the special ed kids at my school, some autistic girl I barely know attempted to flirt with me. Luckily my friend was there to say how I liked someone else, but that didn't stop her from saying ''I can kinda imagine us together.'' I then said ''Yes, our imaginations are wonderful things'' in a sarcastic tone.



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25 May 2008, 9:04 am

I didn't realise that 'autistic girls' were a genre unto themselves. A girl is a girl.



jetzee
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25 May 2008, 9:25 am

I have also never met a girl with aspergers but I am adopted and I know that if i meet a girl that is adopted I feel more interested in them because I have something in common with them that I dont have with most people so I think it would be the same for aspergers even though I only found out I had aspergers a few weeks ago



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25 May 2008, 10:07 am

I've never met a girl on the spectrum, so I wouldn't know. I imagine it would depend on the girl.


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25 May 2008, 1:05 pm

Heh, awkwardness provides some level of attraction to me, just because of the fact that that's one of the things I relate to most. But that wouldn't be the only determinant (personality, interests, general ability to converse)



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25 May 2008, 1:16 pm

Io wrote:
I don't think I've ever met one..
Same here never met one my age.



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25 May 2008, 2:46 pm

Yeah, well some. Noticed a few on here aswell.



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26 May 2008, 2:50 pm

MartyMoose wrote:
Io wrote:
I don't think I've ever met one..
Same here never met one my age.

though I do tend to like girls who are a little quirky and eccentric.



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26 May 2008, 5:16 pm

ecdit



Last edited by Sorenna on 27 May 2008, 11:05 am, edited 1 time in total.

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26 May 2008, 8:57 pm

I like shy girls, slightly introvert, but who are always up for an intelligent chat on arts, politics, life in general, deep stuff usually. I don't like girls who like to party out frequently, I tend to find shyness and fragility somewhat attractive.

If those traits could be seen as frequent with Aspie girls, then I guess I'll reply "yes" to this question. Also, if both have AS it may make the relationship easier because you don't need to worry about your other half understanding/tolerating your Aspie traits.


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01 Sep 2009, 1:22 am

Even though i have no experience with serious relationships, i had a girl in one of my classes who had Aspie like traits who had a thing for me (including not being physically attractive in my opinion, making too much off-beat jokes and just bugging me constantly when i was sleeping in class) but i simply didn't have anything for her (but i didn't show my true feelings or tell about my true feelings), i just essentially just played along and wanted to be nice to others because i have no intent in hurting other peoples feelings, because all I have is good intentions for me and the people around me. But honestly I preffer NT's over Aspie if you ask me, because im not really the way i used to be when i was younger, like in high school or middle school.



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01 Sep 2009, 10:32 am

Veresae wrote:
Depends how high or low functioning. If she's any lower functioning than the average aspie, then usually I don't find her attractive, and even if she is relatively high functioning certain little things can really turn me off. >.>

I knew a girl who was more medium-functioning autism in high school...while she wasn't stupid exactly (I'm sure she was very intelligent in some ways), I found her so naive and repulsive and irritating and giggly and immature and with an annoying as hell voice. (Think Spongebob's style of speaking, except her actual voice was different.) And to top it all off, she had a crush on me. So yeah...wasn't good. Classic example: in high school theatre class the kids were doing a skit in which a girl was being on trial for masturbating in class, and several of the other students were basically called up there pretending to be eye witnesses. The autistic girl was one of the "eye witnesses" and showed through her response that she clearly had no idea what masturbation was. And she was so gleeful in her ignorance. In another time we were playing charades, and when she went up she so completely misunderstood what she was supposed to be doing, but was still so gleeful and giggly about it. I find such...gleeful ignorance and immaturity to just be really icky.

With aspie girls it's hard to say. Oftentimes they have things that attract me to them--they're more likely to share interests with me than non-aspie girls, it seems, and I like the strangeness. But...and I hate to stereotype, but so many of them are so trapped in damage. While I can definitely be friends with someone who is as damaged and depressed as I, it's hard for me to be anything more in many cases because...someone who can't get themselves to change, to grow and mature, someone who doesn't have enough faith in their abilities to improve as a person if they try--that is someone I find hard to date, because whenever I ask her how her life is her response always makes me feel so miserable. How could I fall in love with someone like that? That would imply the most intense care I had, and that would make my well being dependent on her's--and she would always be damaged, always be sad. >.< Just having some issues or being depressed isn't what I mean, though...that's all fine...but someone who would never grow up without help...that's not appealing.


She sounds adorable :3 I so want her as a best friend lol.
Being a mostly straight girl (I allow some exceptions :wink:) I will comment on the boys. I know quite a few autisic boys (both aspie and autie) and I am friends with some of them. Well, I have had loads of crushes on aspie dudes for some reason, I don't know it's something about their sense of humours and their sensitive side that gets me. I don't just seek out aspies though of course I don't care what brain structure they have, it just so happens that I find myself having a natural attraction so aspie-like boys. I like their eyes too how they have that daydreamy look to them *drools* anyway like I said I don't just go for aspies of course lol.


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