I am afraid of using Facebook! (Few friends)
I have few to no friends in real life. I could add many acquaintances but many of these 'acquaintances" who can become "Facebook friemds" are from college (professors, classmates etc) or some other place and have no business viewing what my family, for example, writes on my wall. My facebook account looks empty. Im not comfortable letting "facebook friends"/acquaintances just view anything. I wish there was someway to control what posts Person A or Person B could view and not view on my wall.
Im thinking of starting a new account from scratch and just add people whom I can trust. it sounds good but Im afraid. It will only be my family, cousins and just a few other people and I am afraid I might have less than 60 people on my list. That's embarrassing by facebook standards. I know for a fact that 300+ friends are necessary so that you won't be judged as socially inept on Facebook.
I have been hiding the fact that I am socially inept for years and that I have always felt there was a black hole in my head when it came to talking to people.It's not shyness or a phobia. Just me "not being there".Now everyone will know when they see that i have few friends. And I might be viewed as a loser. Is it acceptable to have 60 facebook friends or less?
I want to connect with people who I have not seen in years. Im not so much afraid of having less than 60 facebook friends I just don't want to be treated differently by people.
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Another thing. If someone writes on my facebook wall does it appear in his/her wall meaning people who I don't even know can see it ?
I kid you not, the only friends I have are from WP. The other "friends" I have are family. I no longer worry about how many friends I have, I just use it as a way to stay in touch with some people. I never get out with real people due to lack of transportation and people living so far away from me.
As for privacy, I think you can set it up to where only close friends can see. They've got it to where you got family, friends and acquaintances. If you post something you can show it to which ever group of people you want although I do wish there was more privacy as far as posting goes.
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I live as I choose or I will not live at all.
~Delores O’Riordan
You can also control who sees what posts, and you can group people in lists, eg have all your family in one list, and WP people in another list, and post only to that list.
Yes I was aware of the hide friends option I forgot about it.
I didnt know there was a list option. That's interesting thanks.
For ME it isn't a big deal at all. I would prefer just one or two friends as long as they don't reject me for being an autist like many people have done in my life.
For OTHER people in my country it's a big deal. Yes the world is dumb.
I kid you not, the only friends I have are from WP. The other "friends" I have are family. I no longer worry about how many friends I have, I just use it as a way to stay in touch with some people. I never get out with real people due to lack of transportation and people living so far away from me.
As for privacy, I think you can set it up to where only close friends can see. They've got it to where you got family, friends and acquaintances. If you post something you can show it to which ever group of people you want although I do wish there was more privacy as far as posting goes.
Yes Facebook is still behind in privacy settings
Actually I dont really care about facebook itself. Its so popular that I feel its a necessary evil. Apparently no one reads my emails because they are all on facebook. And my personal instant messaging is full of offline people... because they are all on facebook. (My phones broken) And the other thing is that Im in university and the only way to communicate with people in my family is ...on facebook. And if I have a group project or report and we have to talk about it.... yes you guessed it.... its on facebook.
But I will never use Twitter.
I agree, I've never seen the phenomenon of adding thousand of people you haven't met or don't know personally in real life. I just don't see the point in publishing every detail, maybe it helps people to feel more self absorbed or important, most of the information I have read on Facebook is pointless.
just today i noticed students from the school i had studied had recently gone on a reunion
and now they went on a picnic...everybody laughing, enjoying having a good time
well when i wrote a good cheerful comment on their photo they deleted it...........facebook is not for children of lesser god.
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The only thing right in this wrong world is
WRONG PLANET
Previously had a FB account and closed it, has it was difficult to keep up with other people, or i would find my comment deleted or being laughed at. Since then, I have rejoined and I have hide the amount of friends i have, and put different people into different lists (so that you can post to a list and the others will not see it). I still find the social aspect difficult and in truth i have very few friends, but it has been a great way to add people who I share views with. For example I have one list that is for MP's, another for news and another called 'disabilities'. If i want the latest news i go to my news list, or if i want to find out what my local MP's are up to i go to that list and so forth.
I have approximately 100 friends added on FB, but only around 20 of these people i have met personally. Out of these 20 very few keep in contact, but the occasional like or comment on a post, does feel good and does not feel like hard work. Its when they want to go into a long conversation i find it difficult and taxing of my energy.
SanityTheorist
Veteran
Joined: 13 Feb 2012
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,105
Location: The Akuma Afterglow
I have 9 Facebook friends and use it for updates from bands primarily. I don't see why you'd be having social pressure.
My dad always said "quality over quantity." Very true of friendships.
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My music at: http://www.youtube.com/user/SanityTheorist5/videos
Currently working on getting in a studio to record my solo album 40+ tracks written.
Chatroom nicks: MetalFluttershy/MetalTwilight/SanityTheorist
If you click on the little gear thing (settings) that comes up when you hover around the heading of your post on facebook ~ just now I saw it next to where it said "Thursday" under my name at the heading of a post on my page ~ you will see a drop down menu to "control" who sees that individual post of yours.
Also there is a place in the security settings to make one of those settings your default. Mine is set to "custom" by default, and my "custom" setting is "friends only, except [list of people not allowed to see it]".
If you need "friends" to look respectable in your country, I'll be your friend if you want. I have friends on facebook (mostly family members in my case) who are excluded from reading pretty much everything I post. It wouldn't bother me if you blocked me from everything and I might do the same; I tend to go through times of wanting extreme privacy. But anyway, if what you need is numbers . . .
When I first started looking around facebook, I was a little shocked (maybe a lot shocked) to discover that all through my life, I had evidently been just skimming along the surface of this huge, constant web of social interaction among all the other people I knew. I didn't even feel excluded about it while it was happening, because I was just about completely unaware of the fact that everyone was getting together to hang out with each other, all the time, except me. Luckily I wasn't upset by it ~ just bemused ~
It's OK. Just don't take facebook too seriously. People are weird. All people. Even if they're weird in the same way as the "typical" majority, they are still very, very weird.
Ok Ive decided to open up my wall after 2 years of being closed. Just for family members and people I can trust. I'm putting everyone else who insist on using facebook for communicating and work on lists. (yes I hate people who insist on facebook walls and not emailing me personally). I dont really have many real friends just mostly family and people who absolutely insist that university work has to be on Facebook. Just so that people would stop asking why I keep my privacy settings tighter than North Korea.
Just a question: If someone writes on my wall I know it appears on theirs and their friends can see what they wrote. (So much for privacy...) Even with max privacy settings can I control that? Or is that off limits to me?
Just noticed facebook has made Timeline compulsory and by 12th march my profile will get converted into Timeline.
Timeline is giving out lot more information like when i got married, when i joined facebook........its even more threatening to me
who cares i dont have anybody i know personally on facebook anyways
_________________
The only thing right in this wrong world is
WRONG PLANET
It's been interesting to read people's thoughts on this. Me, I've always been just way to introverted to have a Facebook account. I cherish my relative internet anonymity, & I've always guarded my privacy carefully. In fact, I've revealed more personal information at WP than at any other forum, but here I at least feel like I'm among accepting & nonjudgmental people. Recently I've had to reconsider this aversion to Facebook, just because of the fact that it seems everyone else is on it, & I've learned firsthand how effective it is for purposes of organizing, promoting, advertising, networking, etc.
Guys need help!
Im trying to use the Facebook list thing. Its fine if I need to post (and I never/rarely do anyway) since I can filter out who can read and who shouldnt. But what if SOMEONE ELSE posts on my wall how do I make sure for instance that:
University listed people's posts can ONLY read university listed people's posts
or Family listed people's posts can only read family posts
etc?
Timeline is giving out lot more information like when i got married, when i joined facebook........its even more threatening to me
who cares i dont have anybody i know personally on facebook anyways
I saw that timeline thing on a friend's facebook and didn't like it and found it confusing and don't want it.
I have 5 facebook friends and would probably delete 2 since we never talk on facebook but I don't want them asking me why I deleted them.
I'd delete my facebook and only have it because a real life friend I have that lives in another state convinced me to get one to keep in touch. I barely ever post on mine. I have nothing to post.
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