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LePetitPrince
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14 Dec 2008, 4:42 pm

I don't believe in e-friendships, I don't believe in "e-friends", I always did ....

People who are friendly to each others online are not necessarily compatible in real life , so online friendliness can't be counted as friendship...in my opinion.


NTs find it strange when I say that, most people tell me that they can form friendships through msn and can talk to them by phone on earlier stage without any awkwardness.

Is anyone like that?



anna-banana
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14 Dec 2008, 4:50 pm

yeah, I have a strong resolution of never meeting people I met online IRL again. I met two and they were both utter failures.

I knew them for over a year each through email and msn but there was just no understanding and no real communication between us IRL. probably mostly on my part, but dealing with the pressure of their expectations of me was excruciating and mind-numbing.


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LePetitPrince
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14 Dec 2008, 5:10 pm

^^yea, I experienced such failures.
It seems that normal people usually can get along after e-friendship, I never could do it.

Another evidence that the problem in us , not in the normal people.



richardbenson
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14 Dec 2008, 5:18 pm

i never want to meet anyone anymore off line, i did in the past but i wasnt thinking. now i have very good friends but they dont move. infact the best friends dont know how to speak, walk or high five each other. usually the best friends you can have you can hold in your hand and put in your pocket


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0_equals_true
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14 Dec 2008, 5:41 pm

I think it is a question of attitude and being realistic. My two closest friends I met online. I never did the extensive corresponding with them before hand except for one penpal, but we didn’t correspond every day. I have also met quite a number of future friends, maybes, general acquaintances from forums.

One of my close friends I met for a gig meet. The other was for a radio comedy show, which I invited some other people that I met.

Only two of the people I met online have been a problem, one of them is sort of ok now as far as know but we don't meet up. The other was a creep and *tried* to creep me and my friend out. We both came to the conclusion independently that we didn't want to associate with him ever again.

People online are totally different in real life but not necessarily bad. You have to use your common sense. Don't meet up alone with someone, when you are not in a public place.



0_equals_true
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14 Dec 2008, 5:42 pm

richardbenson wrote:
i never want to meet anyone anymore off line, i did in the past but i wasnt thinking. now i have very good friends but they dont move. infact the best friends dont know how to speak, walk or high five each other. usually the best friends you can have you can hold in your hand and put in your pocket

You must have might big pokets rb



richardbenson
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14 Dec 2008, 5:57 pm

well i was trying to get at that i usually keep my fire agate with me, :wink:

but i see your sarcasm and i high five you. imagine me doing it now, ahhh it feels so good to have friends online 8)


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Keeno
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14 Dec 2008, 6:40 pm

I never got anywhere with online "friendship".



zghost
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14 Dec 2008, 6:57 pm

I agree it doesn't necessarily translate into the real world, but I think you can have e-friends. Otherwise most of us would never meet anyone beyond out home city.



anna-banana
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14 Dec 2008, 7:54 pm

0_equals_true wrote:
The other was a creep and *tried* to creep me and my friend out. We both came to the conclusion independently that we didn't want to associate with him ever again.



do tell.


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buryuntime
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14 Dec 2008, 10:14 pm

I find that kind of upsetting, considering the only friends I have are "e-friends". I've never associated with any of them outside the internet, but without the internet I probably would have no social interaction with anybody except my family.

I've also think I've learned A LOT about people and social situations from talking with others on the internet. When I first got the internet no body would want to talk to me because I was really immature, but now people don't see me like that.



pensieve
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15 Dec 2008, 12:24 am

I talk to people less and less online, apart from the people that I can actually visit.



MissConstrue
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15 Dec 2008, 3:57 am

I have made a couple of friends online and we've e-mailed eachother for a year now back and forth. We've made it clear on the notion that none of us are good at answering right away.

I don't know, I think it all depends on how comfortable you are with that person even online. It's easier for me to type than it is to talk so that's mostly where I do most of the chit chatting.


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0_equals_true
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15 Dec 2008, 7:01 am

richardbenson wrote:
well i was trying to get at that i usually keep my fire agate with me, :wink:

but i see your sarcasm and i high five you. imagine me doing it now, ahhh it feels so good to have friends online 8)

I bet if you pass by people they say "Is that a fire agate in your pocket or are you just please to see me!" :D



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15 Dec 2008, 7:37 am

anna-banana wrote:
0_equals_true wrote:
The other was a creep and *tried* to creep me and my friend out. We both came to the conclusion independently that we didn't want to associate with him ever again.



do tell.

wouldn't you like to know.

Well once we were meeting up and he insisted on meeting near a toilet in kings cross, which happens to be one of these underground toilets with a stairs. I didn't want to wait there so I waited across the way and just look out for him. I must have waited a half an hour and nobody came in and he suddenly came up the toilet, turned and then left, I had to rush after him I just put it down to social anxiety at the time. Also online I was discussing anger and he posted a really weird post about loosing control as if I would go on a killing spree or something. Then with my friend he was always insisting that she met him on his own and collect him from the station. Then he started to fain illness. This was after my friends had told everyone she worked to an ataxia charity. That is a motor condition which make people look like they are intoxicated. He would did it really unsubtlely. He would learn on me and my friend, while walking. It was pretty blatant. Then once when we were going to the park he suddenly disappeared for ten minutes (again this is not unusual for social anxiety), when he cam back he had a beer and he was sniffling. Suddenly blood started dripping down one nostril. There is a possibility that was allergies, but also possible that he made it happen. Then finial at some comedy, he started leaning into me and I kept pushing him away, he was also kept spilling his drink like he couldn’t hold it up. He was sort of pretending to be coming in an out of conscious but really blatant hollywood. When it ended I need to leave to catch the train anyway, so I rushed out of there. I never saw him again.

I guess we were kind of naive to let if go on so long, we made allowances for him because he could get really depressed. He called himself a ‘dweeb’ all the insult he used for himself are very American/80s and not really used in the UK at all.

But that is nothing my over trusting friend, I spent ages trying to convince him not to go when this really aggressive pushy guy was trying to get him to go to stay overnight in Brighton and mentioned something about taking E. Basically my friend didn’t want to go at all, but he can’t tell people to f**k off when it is needed and just feel guilty as he always sees the good side in anyone. He was nearly rail road into it. I literally had to emotionally blackmail my friend a bit to get him not to go. The guy called him a “soft cock” for standing him up. It was obvious he was planning something untoward.



anna-banana
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15 Dec 2008, 7:44 am

8O

and I thought my encounters with online people were crazy...


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