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How Many Of You Live On Your Own?
I live on my own 72%  72%  [ 147 ]
I dont live on my own 28%  28%  [ 57 ]
Total votes : 204

Joker
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02 Apr 2012, 12:52 am

Ahh thats nice I would like to get married one day but I am afriad of getting to close to women on a emotional level.



Dreamslost
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02 Apr 2012, 1:28 am

I have been living on my own since separated and divorced. The separtion, then divorce kept me from everyone


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lostonearth35
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02 Apr 2012, 12:39 pm

I hope I never have to live with other people again! I have been living on my own in an apartment for several years now. Before that I was put in a home with at least ten other people, most of them with chronic schizophrenia. I had to share my bedroom and clean up after other people's messes and listen to people screaming, crying, or retching like they were going to throw up. Then I was put in a "small options" home where I had my own room and only two other people and a staff but one of the residents had severe OCD and every morning at the crack of dawn the staff would be banging on the bathroom door and telling her she needed to finish her "rituals" and come out. When it was her turn to prepare a meal she would take forever and we'd be eating lunch at 1:30 instead of noon and if we went anywhere she would make us late. I know it's terrible to have OCD but I was stressed and angry with her a lot.
Then they closed down the home and moved us to a new place that I didn't like because we were too far from anything that I wanted to go to so I wouldn't have to spend the day at the home. Everything seemed to get really bad after that, my meltdowns got a lot worse and I was moved to different homes several more times before finally getting kicked out. No one including me knew I has Asperger's and back then and the staff firmly believed I did not have any mental problems and was acting out behaviorally. They blamed me and my parents. Then I was put in the hospital, finally diagnosed with Asperger's, put into a home for severe mentally-challenged people for a short time, taken back in with my parents before I suffered a nervous breakdown from being there, put back into a small options home but suffered terrible anxiety attacks, depression, insomnia, sleep apnea, meltdowns and mild PTSD problems, got kicked out again, tried to live on my own but failed horribly because of a drunken idiot neighbor, got put in the hospital again, was taken back in again by my parents and lived with them for about a year before I was finally stable enough to get a new place of my own and have been living on my own since. Although I sometimes would like to have someone around to talk to, most of the time I don't miss living with anyone in the homes and places I'm forced to revisit in my dreams.



Logan5
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02 Apr 2012, 2:06 pm

I have spent most of my adult life living by myself. Even if I was in a long term relationship, at minimum I would have to have my own room.

Anyway, the following article may be of some interest.
"I Want To Be Alone: The Rise And Rise Of Solo Living."
"The number of people living alone has skyrocketed. What is driving the phenomenon?"
by Eric Klinenberg
http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/ ... olo-living



ellora
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02 Apr 2012, 2:55 pm

I have lived on my own for the past 6 years, prior to this I was married twice, totalling 17 years. I am very content on my own despite financial issues. I do fear though that Ive become so set in my ways that it would now be difficult for me to live with a partner again.



Halligeninseln
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02 Apr 2012, 6:51 pm

My partner decided living together was too stressful for me (not for her apparently 8O ) and shipped me out into my own appartment eight years ago :roll: . We are still together though, so that I'm living on my own as a complete hermit and in a permanent relationship at the same time, which is maybe the ideal state for some aspies or otherwise disordered persons. Since then I've been free to indulge my solitary ways and obsessive, repetitive learning habits whilst having a bit of emotional support from someone. So, yes I live alone and am probably somewhere on some sort of spectrum too.



jdbob
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03 Apr 2012, 2:26 am

Except for spending about 10 weeks staying with friends in New Zealand I've lived alone for the past 33 years.



Frankleton
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03 Apr 2012, 3:03 am

I live in a student house with five other students. Its quite fun because they are a really good laugh and are always fun to be around. They are all at home for Easter though so until they come back in three weeks time, I've got the house to myself which is pretty cool! It's weird though; it feels sort of lonely without them around!



lostmyself
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03 Apr 2012, 4:30 am

I liked it when I was living on my own. t'was much better than living with friends or family. avoided a lot of altercations and misunderstandings living on my own.



Joker
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03 Apr 2012, 8:41 pm

The like best thing ever about living on your own is that you can do what every you want and no one can say anything about it.



felinesaresuperior
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07 Apr 2012, 3:01 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
I hope I never have to live with other people again! I have been living on my own in an apartment for several years now. Before that I was put in a home with at least ten other people, most of them with chronic schizophrenia. I had to share my bedroom and clean up after other people's messes and listen to people screaming, crying, or retching like they were going to throw up. Then I was put in a "small options" home where I had my own room and only two other people and a staff but one of the residents had severe OCD and every morning at the crack of dawn the staff would be banging on the bathroom door and telling her she needed to finish her "rituals" and come out. When it was her turn to prepare a meal she would take forever and we'd be eating lunch at 1:30 instead of noon and if we went anywhere she would make us late. I know it's terrible to have OCD but I was stressed and angry with her a lot.
Then they closed down the home and moved us to a new place that I didn't like because we were too far from anything that I wanted to go to so I wouldn't have to spend the day at the home. Everything seemed to get really bad after that, my meltdowns got a lot worse and I was moved to different homes several more times before finally getting kicked out. No one including me knew I has Asperger's and back then and the staff firmly believed I did not have any mental problems and was acting out behaviorally. They blamed me and my parents. Then I was put in the hospital, finally diagnosed with Asperger's, put into a home for severe mentally-challenged people for a short time, taken back in with my parents before I suffered a nervous breakdown from being there, put back into a small options home but suffered terrible anxiety attacks, depression, insomnia, sleep apnea, meltdowns and mild PTSD problems, got kicked out again, tried to live on my own but failed horribly because of a drunken idiot neighbor, got put in the hospital again, was taken back in again by my parents and lived with them for about a year before I was finally stable enough to get a new place of my own and have been living on my own since. Although I sometimes would like to have someone around to talk to, most of the time I don't miss living with anyone in the homes and places I'm forced to revisit in my dreams.


you mean your nightmares.
that sounds SO horrible. your parents should just have let you stay with them, if you couldnt live on your own. it would've been better than those places you've described.
i live alone now, thank god. i lived with my parents till i was twenty two, and it was hard to live with them, because they're difficult and inconsiderate and have to have the last say no matter what. i moved out, went aboard, worked for mcdonalds and burger king and... never mind, the list is too long. i got paid minimum wage and lived in a tiny, one bedroom apartment in a poverty neighborhood where gangsters leaned on the door to the building and often i'd hear shots. someone got murdered by a rival gang banger once and i heard the screams and the shooting and the next morning i saw the bloodstains on the sidewalk next to his house as i walked to work. i even went hungry sometimes and wore second hand clothes.
but it's better than living in those situations you've described. anything is better than not living alone, far as i'm concerned. i came back and lived with my parents for a few months age thirty one and it was awful. now they bought me a house. i still live in poverty and have noise problems etc, but at least i live alone. i cant stand living not alone. that's the only way i can live.
my parents put pressure on me to join the army, i refused and held my ground. i cant stand it. i need privacy and cant stand orders barked at me. that was a long time ago, though.


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Outer_Darkness
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08 Apr 2012, 7:34 pm

I've lived with relatives my entire life, but right now I'm temporarily by myself since my brother is overseas and my father is in the hospital.



ExcitinglyOpaque
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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08 Apr 2012, 9:06 pm

Nope, married and husband's the breadwinner.



NicoleG
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08 Apr 2012, 10:57 pm

I live "independently", but with roommates to save on rent. I count that as living on my own.



BuyerBeware
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09 Apr 2012, 7:50 am

Define "on your own."

I don't live with any caregiver or in an institution or group home.

I moved out of my dad's house when I was 18.

I lived in a dorm for a year. I hated it. I bought a trailer. It cost $4000 and was close to school and the store. I had a car but didn't have to drive it if I didn't want to. I walked a lot of places so I didn't have to fight traffic and hunt for parking. All I had to rent was the lot, so the trailer paid for itself in a couple years. I liked it there. I was lonely and not a very good housekeeper at first, but I learned a lot. After I got my homework done I walked around and talked to strangers in the evenings. I went to see Daddy on the weekends.

I don't know if it was a "good enough" life, but I liked it. I was learning to live and having fun.

I met my husband when I was almost 21. He didn't like the dorm either. He moved in.

Now I live with him and the kids. Until late in 2010, I wasn't a house pet or someone he had to take care of. I stayed home with the kids because it was what I wanted to do. I went ahead and finished my BA, but we decided on it when our first kid was born in 2001.

I did all the domestic stuff. Housekeeping, business, child care. I was good at it. The house was clean (enough) and we ate fresh veggies, lean meat, and whole grains. I was even getting most of our veggies locally and canning them myself and learning to garden and teaching preschool at home.

I didn't have any friends, but I did have some good acquaintances. Neighbors and such who stopped over for coffee. Sometimes a sandwich.

We weren't perfect or anything, but it ran. Pretty well.

NTs make that choice all the time and no one says they're not "living on their own." That's something adults do, and if they have standard neurology it's a valid lifestyle choice.

Then I got sick. Anxious, depressed. Started thinking "looking normal" was the only thing that really mattered.

Now I think I ought to be living in an institution. I used to feel like I was OK. I don't know if it was a lie or not. I don't feel OK anymore. If it was a lie, I want to go back.


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