Have/do you obsess over a person?
Yes. I am obsessed with the actor Jason Isaacs. I have no idea why? I am in four of his fan clubs have every movie that he has ever been in, pictures of him everywhere, every audio book that he has ever narrated even all the computer games he as narrated as well and every avatar the last airbender cartoon that he does the voice for one of the characters in, every video interview I can find on him and every magazine interview I have.
nick007
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Joined: 4 May 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,059
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in the police state called USA
I kinda of obsess about women I have crushes on like Miranda Cosgrove rite now but I mostly obsess over my ex. I was completely obsessed with her when we wer together like 7 years ago but now I kind of obsessively think about the relationship especially here on WP when it can be relevant to lots of discussions. If by some miracle I find someone else; I'll likely be completely obsessed with her.
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We went out a couple of times and I found myself getting very attracted towards her, I would often sneak a little peak at her and give myself a little smile. Physically, she is very pretty, everything I would go for. I also liked the way she treats me - kind, considerate and easy to talk to. Through my life, a lot of people have treated me horribly and it was obvious that nice Helen would become something good in my life. Soon after, I completely fell apart - I found myself missing her so intensely when we were apart and I would often count the days to when I next saw her. At the same time, I was also experiencing money issues and other personal problems, so its not suprising really that I went so low. I knew that I had to get better, so I get in touch with a very good and understanding mate who works for the company and who knew Helen and I told him about my feelings and he told me that it was all about being human and caring towards others. I told him that I knew the boundaries and would never cross that line into dangerous ground. I know of Helen's circumstances and would do nothing to harm that. Ever. I even started putting my mind into other things, and would often go walking to get fitter and to analyze my feelings. I found some amazing things out about myself, things that go right back to childhood: my lifelong obsessions/infatuations over women. I even know most of their names and compiled a secret list to analyze and understand. I analyzed what I like about her physically and not once did I ever think about anything inappropiate. I don't view her that way. Also, my lack of sex during the earlier years really hurt my personal growth, so as an adult, I am compensating by behaving the way I am. Recently, I had some and it really helped me focus more on different things.
Recently, she was ill and I didn't see her for 2 weeks. That was okay because I got over my infatuation with her and when I saw her earlier today, I was buzzing with excitement. I still like her, but don't want these feelings getting me down. Even she would hate to see me get sad over anything. Towards the end of this weeks time, I found myself getting sad that we had to part, just like before when I missed her intensely. I think its because of the 2 week gap. Time will heal all things, by christmas hopefully. We get on so well, I've given her a lot of insight into the job that she does - dealing with AS people. She really appreciates that. I see her again next Tuesday and until then I'll carry on focusing on other things like my movies and shopping, and analyze further on my daily walks. It ain't over til its over, there's still things to explore and I can take pride that I am being very mature about sorting myself out. I've been very brave and went through massive trauma. The journey continues, but by Christmas, things should be concluded.
An update from my quoted post above:
I returned a little while ago from being out with Helen, and I find that there is no sadness when we parted this time. I'm really happy that happened. Of course, a mild reoccurence could happen, its just a case of analyzing what caused that particular moment.
I've considered PTSD for myself aswell. Being upset over the college issue for 5 years not even enjoying a vacation to Boston&NY (Boston=college MECHA) so that stirred up emotion. I'd turn away when seeing ads for "that" college etc. (Now I'm going back to where it happen) YES the exact same campus and no DOUBT I WILL run into that teacher I upset LOL! We'll see how it goes.
They never like me back though
Bingo. But when they do the same thing to you too it's like some crazy feedback loop that threatens to destroy the universe.
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Yes I do think I can get obsessed with people sometimes e.g. I go though a phase where I think about them for all or most of the time I think it is because of the tendancy of my mind to "lock on" to a single subject and once that happens I find it difficult to fight those thoughts out of my mind. The good thing is that the quasi obessive thoughts I have about other people are almost always positive in nature unless I get so obsessed than I might start feeling paranoid about them for example and think that they might do things that deep down I know they never will. Normally I get obsessed about my friends but it has sometimes happened over family members in the past but when I was in school I used to get obsessed with girls in my class sometimes were I would think about them a lot during the day -even when they were not around for example I did get quite obsessed with this girl called Wendy that used to sit next to me in the classroom -and tried to communicate with her but she seemed to be to a bit shy with me or didn't seem to like me that much and I noticed that seemed to make the obsession more intense - e.g. the more I could not get her the more I would think about her but would you describe that as an infatuation involving sexual feelings rather than a standard Aspie type fixation. I have also noticed that I have had obessions towards people from quite an early age (about 5 years old in myself). This girl called Wendy also seemed a bit of a misfit and did not get on to well with the other girls in our class and the other kids used to go on about her being "strange" - she also used to talk in a bit of a strange way for a girl from my area (Liverpool) - do you think she could have been an example of an Aspie female?
Luke
I usually obsess over people who don't like me or give me a hard time. I spend hours obsessing thinking how to best get back at them. In school for some reason, staring was particularly effective. It kind of freaked them out. Then I would keep a close eye to see if they did anything that might merit the teacher keeping them after school, during recess, or get them in trouble of some sort.
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