Falling In Love With a (M|F) as a (M|F)

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OP, while I think the concept you're describing is a bit complex, I'm wondering what you're identifying as problematic about your situation. What's bugging you about being able to relate to a woman so well? Is there a downside? Seriously, I think it would be cool to meet a guy like you (provided that you were certain about being straight...no girl wants to be dating a guy who's discovering his alternative lifestylist side - it just makes you sad). You've kinda got the inside track on women....which seems like a win/win for you.

Yeah its a good thing and i never said it wasn't. I've only just recently (as I posted) had this side to me begin to appear and become my dominent side. It seems to be the main reason my social life even exists which I love but whats happened a lot so far is I end up being seen as another girl-friend. I'm extremely shy around new people and when I get to the point of wanting to be more then friends I'm a nervous wreck. The only thing I would say is a problem is I went from completely locking my emotions away for years to now having almost no control over them. I sorta went from one extreme to the other.

Oh...I get it now. Is there a particularly close friend you could share your predicament with? Maybe a mutual friend who you'd feed comfortable taking into your confidence about a crush you're working on? Maybe that person could provide you with some feedback about how you come across, or how to indicate your interest in a particular young lady, or perhaps enlighten you about any young ladies that might share your feelings? It's always good to know as much as you can before you, "make your move." Is there someone in your circle of friends who can help you out?

Yeah I've got a few people I talk with, one of them actually is the current young lady I am interested in and she already knows this (we met through an online dating site) We've yet to meet in person but we've IM and Videochatted a lot (near 20hours in a week). I also talk with an old old friend whom I have recently reconnected with. So the biggest issues now are trying to keep my emotions under some control and making sure I am able to talk to her (and other people) and not phrase things in ways that people may take differently from how I meant them.

Well, it seems like you're doing everything right to prepare for your first in-person meeting with this young lady. Would you be comfortable telling her (prior to the meeting) that you're concerned you may be nervous and a bit awkward in-person (until you're comfortable in her presence - cause she's so awesome )?

We have already discussed that (I think?), the fact that I wear (and prefer) skirts (she loves this), my Asperger's, one of the things i've gotten into the habit of doing recently is trying to make sure my friends understand that I can have difficulty in social situations (the phrasing part in particular). Which has helped a lot in my keeping friends for more then a few months at a time.

i also tend to feel quite feminine sometimes in the love department.
when it comes to that i'm very emotional, romantic, but at the same time i'm also largely physical.
so i guess i got the best of both worlds on that one.