How good are your social skills?

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AS a kid my social skills were non-existant. I changed schools a lot, which helped me overcome my fear of change and fear of new people, at least a little. I also started doing science research, so eventually I had to start presenting my work at scientific meetings. This of course scared me to death. But I got over it, and now I've given presentations all over the country and I'm fine with it.

At about that time, I also got a scholarship to the high school of my dreams, and finally settled down school-wise. At that point (8th grade) I was still really awkward around people of my own age (although I was fine around adults for the most part). I made it my goal to become more social. Due to a variety of other things and months of research and practice, I developed good social skills.

Now, I guess I'm pretty popular at my school. I have a lot of friends, go to parties almost every weekend...the whole bit. I'm pretty happy with my life as it is now. I like being able to consciously control my social skills (since they don't come natural). It gives me a different perspective on things than most people.

Gah that was way too long.

They've been getting better, although I still have trouble understanding the whole tact thing. My knowledge of body language is fairly basic, but it's not too bad, and I'm working on the whole "blurting out answers to rhetorical questions" bit. I have a lot of trouble discerning between possible teasing and genuine interest, though. I'm working on that. Still phobic of strangers as well, mostly, although happily greater involvement in Latin Club is helping that a lot. It's hard to be incredibly incredibly shy when you're taken from your family, dropped on a college campus with thirty other people from your state for a week, and get to make friends based on how much happy geekiness you share with random strangers.

Mine are pretty decent, over the years i've learned to fake interest and my current co workers make things easy for me.
The ppl i directly work with only speak when they need to say something work related and the other ones from the sales department always start the conversation so it isn't hard for me to regurgitate some facts about the current subject i picked up somewere
Over the years nobody ever noticed anything different about me (except my friends telling me i could be a real as*hole and that's what they like about me ).
I even fooled my psycholosomething (can't remember atm what it's called in english) for 1,5 years.

Wow, interesting thread. Amazed that I missed it. So here I go.

When I was a child they had no clue what AS was. I was friendly and outgoing, but so inappropriate that everyone thought I was weird and I got picked on. As an adult I can still be friendly and I have a little more of a clue, but I still talk too much, give out too much information, and freak out at large gatherings where I have to make small talk, and I can only handle people for so long. My family and my two few friends who "get" me are more than enough social interaction for me.

I make up for my lack of social skills by always being gracious and polite, and maintaining the appearance of having a positive outlook on things (even if I have to fake it). Before I came up with this strategy, I always failed to fit in at work, and it did cause problems in the workplace. Now, I get a rep of being a nice guy... a little eccentric, a bit quiet, but still a nice guy nonetheless. I even recently had a supervisor tell me that my positive attitude is contagious. So I guess that's enough to counterbalance the fact that when it comes to social behaviour I have no idea what I am doing.

My social skills are decent, but they vary due to the situation. It's hard for me to maintain relationships because I don't initiate conversations alot. I often go months without speaking to the couple of friends I have. It's hard for me to distinguish between my enemies and potential friends too. Therefore, most of the time I don't bother with new friendships and I don't feel like I am missing much either.

When I'm alone, I'm not obsessing over a particular person..

This allows me to put much more thought into social situations, in fact they've become quite easy lately.

However I still can't last more than an hour or two without generally having to escape.

Humour is definately a good way to work it, I play with words, and use my knowledge and cynicism to make people laugh.

Also music and science are two topics that can offer a lot of things to say, though you wouldn't think it.

Granted in every conversation I still say the wrong things, but I usually don't know when I have so it doesn't really matter, if I can make some people laugh, if I can connect with someone in some way, share some information, its fine.

I do think that I'm great with small talk and talking to people in the workplace and things like that. I also try to be careful of what I say; a lot of times I think about whether or not I plan to say is OK to say in a certain situation. I am fairly good at keeping friends, I think, but college makes it very hard.

As for just coming up to people and talking, doing well at parties, just going out and meeting people...I stink, I must say. At my school, for some reason, this isn't a very good thing to be, and so I don't have a lot of friends, but I do have lots of acquaintances (or, people whom I talk to from time to time, but am not really intimate with). A lot of people here are way too social compared to me. I know this seems silly to ask here, but is it a bad thing that I'm not like that?

With guys I have great social skills. With girls? Well, less so.

Hmmn....

With musicians, generally awesome.

With most girls, very well, to a certain point.

With most guys, find almost nothing to talk about..

I do great once i've know the person for a while. If I know someone for more then
a week or so, i've do pretty well. The first time talk is always the ''tuffest'' for me.

Hmm...

Sometimes I think my social skills are getting all right. Then something always happens to change my mind. So I try my best not to give a damn instead.

my social skills suck

I must say I am similar, though I wouldn't say I am "great" with guys. I can carry on a normal, everyday conversation no problem (about what we did today, the weather, what we will do on our next vacations, etc.). However, people sometimes say that I don't have the timing of conversation down (I cut others off when they are not done speaking sometimes, but nit's not a constant thing), and I also can't pick up body language and facial cues well. All in all, since my friends are nice people, they can still put up with being around me just fine.

On the other hand, I don't know how to approach girls. I don't want to come across as too forward, but yet I also want to convey that I want to be more than friends with them. It is a stereotype that guys mistake a girl smiling at them to be nice for attraction, and for me differentiating the two is even more hopeless. With guys we know we're not trying to convey attraction and so picking up emotional subtleties is not crucial.

With guys I have reasonable social skills. With most girls I have social skills that are slightly less developed than with guys. Nonetheless, both are at a sufficient level that I can at least attract friends, if not consciously make friends. With anyone I'm interested in, just consider me a deer in the headlights, and then a splatter on the side of the road.

Observing people's no big deal. Figuring out most people's intentions and feelings, same thing nowadays. The second I'm interested for more than friendship, you might as well blind and gag me. No, really, that wouldn't change my level of impairment very much at all.

Terrible. Probably because I do not care for people. I am also one of the most confrontational people you would ever meet. I do not need friends. I am my own friend. "Friends" just sort of get in the way for me and no one is ever intrested in the same things I am to the degre I am.