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Should I do it?
Yes 8%  8%  [ 1 ]
No 92%  92%  [ 12 ]
Total votes : 13

wigglyspider
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12 Jan 2010, 10:56 am

First I had to go find out what the hell a sugababe was, lol.

Uh, it sounds like she's being totally irrational. (Can't be sure though.) 3 months? Is it all because of the same fight, or are there more issues between them?

I dunno man, it really depends on the nature of the people involved. I stayed friends with a guy my best friend broke up with even when she turned everyone else against him, but I've also totally cut someone off because I felt they crossed the line. I felt good about both decisions. What it comes down to is: Do you think this is a good guy that you want to stay friends with? If yes, don't delete him. If your GF is still mad, stand your ground and tell her you can do what you want. Because you can. It's your life. People in relationships NEED to understand that, or it'll just get worse and spread to other parts of the relationship.


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superboyian
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12 Jan 2010, 11:25 am

wigglyspider wrote:
First I had to go find out what the hell a sugababe was, lol.

Uh, it sounds like she's being totally irrational. (Can't be sure though.) 3 months? Is it all because of the same fight, or are there more issues between them?

I dunno man, it really depends on the nature of the people involved. I stayed friends with a guy my best friend broke up with even when she turned everyone else against him, but I've also totally cut someone off because I felt they crossed the line. I felt good about both decisions. What it comes down to is: Do you think this is a good guy that you want to stay friends with? If yes, don't delete him. If your GF is still mad, stand your ground and tell her you can do what you want. Because you can. It's your life. People in relationships NEED to understand that, or it'll just get worse and spread to other parts of the relationship.


It did start off with the sugababes article but it for some reason kept escalating and other problems were going on aswell from pushing him in the head, blocking each other, shouting at each other for god knows what reason... and the guy is more of a friend to me, but for some reason, hes blocked me on msn and I don't seem to understand why?

I didn't know that it was going to escalate to the point that I suddenly become involved into this situation.


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Lene
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12 Jan 2010, 12:57 pm

Her falling out with him is her problem, not yours. You aren't joined at the hip and you are entitled to decide for yourself who your friends are and who you add on facebook.

I don't think you should compromise on this, even for a quiet life. If you think about it, she left you for him and you still chose to remain friends with him on facebook, but now that she's run back to you, she's the one demanding you delete him. If it were the other way round (i.e. you demanding she delete him) I'd understand more, but she is in no position to make demands! I really think you should put your foot down about this.

I had an ex who deleted me on facebook; I wasn't upset at it, but I did find the whole thing extremely petty, especially when he tried to act like nothing happened the next time we met :roll:



alana
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12 Jan 2010, 3:58 pm

emc2 wrote:

I have an ex that I added in but it was bugging me, that he would know too much about me, so I removed him but we still keep in touch via the Facebook email from time to time. The person can then see my profile for a month.


what? are you kidding? e-mailing someone on facebook lets them see your profile? holy cow. I never knew that.



Vivienne
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12 Jan 2010, 8:43 pm

I'll be honest, your post confused me. I'm pretty awful with the "he said/she said" thing. Here's the advice I do have:

If he was your friend, before she was your girlfriend - don't delete him.

If he was her friend, before she was your girlfriend - delete him.

If he is a person you both met, while you were dating - delete him.

If he is violent, in trouble with the law, or some kind of crazy junkie - delete him.

If your girlfriend is violent, in trouble with the law, or some kind of crazy junkie - delete her from your life.


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buryuntime
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12 Jan 2010, 8:58 pm

Doesn´t she have autism? People with autism have trouble letting things go sometimes. That would be my explanation of it.



reginaterrae
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13 Jan 2010, 10:04 am

Why are you involved with this girl? Sorry, I'm new here and don't know the background, but just from reading this, WTF? I don't know if you should delete him, but I would definitely delete HER. She sounds totally toxic. How can she not be tearing down your self-esteem?



superboyian
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13 Jan 2010, 10:41 am

buryuntime wrote:
Doesn´t she have autism? People with autism have trouble letting things go sometimes. That would be my explanation of it.


Yes, she does have autism... You got that correct aswell :)

reginaterrae wrote:
Why are you involved with this girl? Sorry, I'm new here and don't know the background, but just from reading this, WTF? I don't know if you should delete him, but I would definitely delete HER. She sounds totally toxic. How can she not be tearing down your self-esteem?


She is like a sister to me and more of a friend, but then she hasn't been herself since this whole thing happened, things was definitely alright until when the guy deleted her on facebook and all these ridiculous arguments these two have had... and escalated to the point that I got dragged into this.

My self-esteem is kind low at this moment but i'm doing things on top of that to keep my spirits up... and plus we don't see much of each other anymore since I left school... Would you think it be anything like that?

Update: Its particularly cool now..... She ain't going to get me involved in this and she kinda stopped asking me and started to realize that she was in the wrong when I had a long talk about it yesterday.... So now I don't really have to delete him.... (hopefully she won't forget today).

And reginaterrae, Welcome to WP :D


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reginaterrae
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13 Jan 2010, 10:47 am

superboyian wrote:
And reginaterrae, Welcome to WP :D


Thanks, superboyian!

Is she your girlfriend, as in sweetheart? or your girlfriend, as in a friend who happens to be a girl? And as long as her drama doesn't affect your self-esteem, you're probably doing a good thing by working on the relationship.



superboyian
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13 Jan 2010, 1:04 pm

reginaterrae wrote:
superboyian wrote:
And reginaterrae, Welcome to WP :D


Thanks, superboyian!

Is she your girlfriend, as in sweetheart? or your girlfriend, as in a friend who happens to be a girl? And as long as her drama doesn't affect your self-esteem, you're probably doing a good thing by working on the relationship.


You're welcome :)

I could say she is as a sweetheart and a friend at the sametime. :) I'm glad that she saw this and suddenly stopped what shes doing... and also thanks for the tip :)


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TheDoctor82
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14 Jan 2010, 6:33 am

Only do it if the person gives you problems.

To be fair, I used to avoid adding certain people out of loyalty to my friends because they were hurt by certain people.

I've come to learn that--regardless of what you see on TV--most of your friends will sadly not have that level of loyalty to you.

Where it works for me now is that....I'm slowly cutting the majority of this drama from my life as I'm not really focusing on a social life at the current time; I have friends, but my focus is my career.