Do you hate it when people try to rush you?

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Lecks
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20 Jan 2010, 1:41 pm

Doesn't everyone hate being rushed?



riverspark
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20 Jan 2010, 7:19 pm

Netish wrote:
I start getting really stressed if people try to rush me. Then I start to forget what I'm doing or get distracted because they got me stressed so I take longer. Then they get even more annoyed and I get more upset because I keep messing up...etc... Anyways, vicious cycle of evilness...


Absolutely! And once I make one mistake, I get rattled and keep making more, until I look like I am completely incompetent, no matter how much I have previously excelled at the task at hand.

People don't even have to actually rush me. Even people who are otherwise friendly and helpful but who talk and think too fast and expect me to keep pace with them can cause me to panic. I call them "Fast People," and they scare the daylights out of me. I feel sad sometimes because I have met some really nice "Fast People" whom I would like to be friends with, but I'm just too anxious around them.



isnessofwhatis
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20 Jan 2010, 11:03 pm

If people try to rush me I try to tell them by doing that they are going to make me move slower. What's even worse is when people tell me to hurry and then watch me. If that happens I'm often done for the day and totally shut down.



isnessofwhatis
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20 Jan 2010, 11:07 pm

timeisdead wrote:
Tim_Tex wrote:
How about when people act as if they are in a big hurry to go somewhere, but they don't actually leave for 30 minutes.

Yeah, they tell you to get ready but they take forever to actually leave.


That annoys me SOOOOO much. Being the black and white thinker I am if someone says dinner at 7 pm then by my thinking that means we should be meeting at the restraunt at 7 pm, not 7:30. I'm the type who is usually 15 minutes early.



Woodpeace
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21 Jan 2010, 3:53 am

I hate it when people try to rush me. It makes me really stressed.



zer0netgain
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21 Jan 2010, 4:37 am

I see this two ways.

1. Yes, it does bother me.

2. As my brain seems to run at light speeds from time to time, I'm sure my eagerness to move on to the next task irritates others running at slower speeds around me.



Jimbeaux
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21 Jan 2010, 7:21 am

We often have to rush my girlfriend's 10 year old aspie, Billy. We don't do this out of meanness, pettiness, or lack of planning on our part. We do it because he has two speeds: slow and piss-poke. We tell him that we need to leave in a half hour and he needs to get dressed. 20 minutes later, he hasn't started as he has been playing with legos. Time to rush him!! ! This happens quite a bit.



ToughDiamond
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21 Jan 2010, 7:55 am

Jimbeaux wrote:
We often have to rush my girlfriend's 10 year old aspie, Billy. We don't do this out of meanness, pettiness, or lack of planning on our part. We do it because he has two speeds: slow and piss-poke. We tell him that we need to leave in a half hour and he needs to get dressed. 20 minutes later, he hasn't started as he has been playing with legos. Time to rush him!! ! This happens quite a bit.

Maybe that's not quite the same thing as rushing him....just getting him to perform the original task instead of other less urgent things. If my boss told me to stop messing about on the web and to get on with my work, that would be similar. If I were already doing my work but doing it too slowly for his liking, and he told me to work faster, he would be rushing me.



Jingo8
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21 Jan 2010, 9:00 am

Try to consider that rather than telling you to work faster, they're telling you to complete the task for an earlier deadline.

Now you open up more possibliities for yourself You can be less thorough, look at less areas, cut something less important, worry less about formatting, complete the core and add the rest later.

When someone asks me to achieve something faster that is possible, i try to offer them the options. Rather than "that's not possible, stop rushing me" i will use "i can do it by then but i will need to either not add presentation formatting, or leave out the graphs i was going to insert, or i can give you a draft version then and send the other one tomorrow". Something like that gives them options and makes it clear you really really are trying, not just being negative.



ToughDiamond
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21 Jan 2010, 11:27 am

Jingo8 wrote:
Try to consider that rather than telling you to work faster, they're telling you to complete the task for an earlier deadline.

Now you open up more possibliities for yourself You can be less thorough, look at less areas, cut something less important, worry less about formatting, complete the core and add the rest later.

When someone asks me to achieve something faster that is possible, i try to offer them the options. Rather than "that's not possible, stop rushing me" i will use "i can do it by then but i will need to either not add presentation formatting, or leave out the graphs i was going to insert, or i can give you a draft version then and send the other one tomorrow". Something like that gives them options and makes it clear you really really are trying, not just being negative.


I just quietly reduce the quality and leave the onus on them to complain if they don't like it. It also underscores the point that if people must rush me, then they won't get such a nice result, and the great thing is that it all happens without my having to argue with them. I once asked a pushy manager whether she wanted a tricky job doing fast or well, and she replied "both." :roll: So now I always think carefully before running anything past a boss.



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28 Jan 2010, 8:24 pm

If I get bogged down enough by peple's rushing me,
I will just let them do it for me and I coast.


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Jak
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28 Jan 2010, 8:48 pm

I get very agitated when someone tries to rush me and it bothers me a lot. I'll do something in my own time and if people don't like it then they'll just have to live with it. I like living life at my own pace and enjoying the journey



chaotik_lord
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28 Jan 2010, 10:58 pm

I schedule myself and adhere to it obsessively.

If I'm rushed, it means I've done someone the great favor of altering my schedule. So naturally I hate it when they rush me.

But I will rush other people (and here I'm thinking of my roommates) if their lack of speed is interfering with my plans or my routine.



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28 Jan 2010, 11:24 pm

I flip right out when people rush me. It is one of many things that will ruin my day and leave me unable to recover for hours.


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29 Jan 2010, 1:30 am

I don't see how anyone would enjoy being rushed by someone else.

I remember back in my early employee days applying for jobs whose job description often included;

'needs to be able to work under pressure'!

Sometimes the requirement was to 'thrive' and even ENJOY working under pressure :!: Who ARE these people :?: :roll:

They also often threw in;

'needs to be able to work in a team' (I think this requirement used to freak me out more than the pressure thing)

It would have been easier to simply state that those on the AS spectrum need not apply :D

Of course, I didn't know I was on the Spectrum back then.

But I did know that taking one of those types of job (which I did back then for financial survival reasons) would be hell.... and they always were.

:shrug:


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29 Jan 2010, 5:14 am

Blindspot149 wrote:
Sometimes the requirement was to 'thrive' and even ENJOY working under pressure :!: Who ARE these people :?: :roll:

Excellent question 8) An easier one would be "how can you tell the jobs market is a buyers' market?" :wink:

Quote:
'needs to be able to work in a team' (I think this requirement used to freak me out more than the pressure thing)

I too am much more scared of team work than hard work. Though I guess teamwork is a more reasonable requirement than the work-till-you-drop thing.

Quote:
It would have been easier to simply state that those on the AS spectrum need not apply :D

It would be interesting to see how the benefits people responded to an Aspie turning down those kind of jobs......assuming there's any other kind.

Quote:
But I did know that taking one of those types of job (which I did back then for financial survival reasons) would be hell.... and they always were.

No wonder the authorities quietly dropped the gambit of telling us there was an afterlife - it's hard to threaten people with hell when they're already experiencing it on Earth.