Can anyone suggest a good Dating Book for Aspie Girls?

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moonnymph
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21 Jan 2010, 8:36 am

Since everything is focused mostly on Aspie men, it is hard for Aspie women to find books that will also help them navigate the dating mine field. If anyone can suggest a dating book with a female prospective I would gladly appreciate it.

Thank you.



MissConstrue
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21 Jan 2010, 10:04 am

Cosmopolitan...

You'll get a ton of tips and advice on how to look, how to behave, what to wear, whatnot to wear, what kind of makeup to apply, how to wear your hair...Lot's of good stuff. :)

















No I'm kidding.....DON'T!!


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lotusblossom
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21 Jan 2010, 12:22 pm

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21 Jan 2010, 3:42 pm

MissConstrue wrote:
Cosmopolitan...

You'll get a ton of tips and advice on how to look, how to behave, what to wear, whatnot to wear, what kind of makeup to apply, how to wear your hair...Lot's of good stuff. :)

















No I'm kidding.....DON'T!!


i almost missed that last bit. :lol: i read one of those when i saw it lieing on a friends couch, and... well, yeah.


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TheMinnesotaIceman
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21 Jan 2010, 5:42 pm

I haven't read any of these (I got them from the bibliography of Tony Attwood's excellent book The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome), but they sound like they would be helpful, not just for aspie women, but for aspies in general. I was thinking of picking these up, myself.

Aston, M. (2003) Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

Edmonds, G. and Worton, D. (2005) The Asperger Love Guide: A Practical Guide for Adults with Asperger's Syndrome to Seeking, Establishing and Maintaining Successful Relationships. London: Paul Chapman Publishing.

Lawson, W. (2005) Sex, Sexuality and the Autism Spectrum. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

Stanford, A. (2003) Asperger Syndrome and Long-term Relationships. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.



Lene
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21 Jan 2010, 6:43 pm

"He's just not that into you"

The book, not the film. I can't recommend it enough. It's written by a guy, and before I read it, I thought it would be anti-feminist misogynistic crap, but when I read it in the aftermath of my first relationship, a lot of things rang true.

It's a book that you probably shouldn't read if you are happy in the relationship (don't fix what's not broken), but if something feels really wrong and you can't quite put your finger on it, this book offers a lot of insight into how to tell if you're dating someone who's not really interested in you for the right reasons, as well as things which you should expect from a healthy relationship. As an aspie girl myself, I found these things quite hard to pick up due to a combination of low self esteem and naivity.



kiwi
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22 Jan 2010, 9:26 am

Lene wrote:
"He's just not that into you"

The book, not the film. I can't recommend it enough. It's written by a guy, and before I read it, I thought it would be anti-feminist misogynistic crap, but when I read it in the aftermath of my first relationship, a lot of things rang true.

It's a book that you probably shouldn't read if you are happy in the relationship (don't fix what's not broken), but if something feels really wrong and you can't quite put your finger on it, this book offers a lot of insight into how to tell if you're dating someone who's not really interested in you for the right reasons, as well as things which you should expect from a healthy relationship. As an aspie girl myself, I found these things quite hard to pick up due to a combination of low self esteem and naivity.


maybe talk to a gay guy :P

someone not interested in you sexually. a good resource .
some are even good hairdressers :P
and dancers.. 8)

they usually like helping people out :)
make over this and that

yeah :) well if you want any advice PM me or www.gayaspie.com



Lene
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22 Jan 2010, 1:55 pm

Thanks Kiwi :)



kiwi
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23 Jan 2010, 12:09 am

Lene wrote:
Thanks Kiwi :)


awesome no worries :P

I guess gay guys can be like real estate agents when it comes to dating :P
hmm I was out with some engineer mates and tried to hook one of them up with a lady
on the dance floor hmmm...

:)

well wish yo luck :P confidence /cheek is hot 8)



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23 Jan 2010, 12:27 am

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzFoW0dVDkU[/youtube]
Not quite a book



Merle
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25 Jan 2010, 12:12 am

moonnymph wrote:
Since everything is focused mostly on Aspie men, it is hard for Aspie women to find books that will also help them navigate the dating mine field. If anyone can suggest a dating book with a female prospective I would gladly appreciate it.

Thank you.


Book? Why do you need a book? You have wrongplanet.net and everyone here willing to give their 0.02 :)



moonnymph
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26 Jan 2010, 10:34 pm

thanks! heh

Merle wrote:

Book? Why do you need a book? You have wrongplanet.net and everyone here willing to give their 0.02 :)



moonnymph
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26 Jan 2010, 10:35 pm

Thank you for your list. Wonder what other people think of them, which of them people would recommend most.

TheMinnesotaIceman wrote:
I haven't read any of these (I got them from the bibliography of Tony Attwood's excellent book The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome), but they sound like they would be helpful, not just for aspie women, but for aspies in general. I was thinking of picking these up, myself.

Aston, M. (2003) Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

Edmonds, G. and Worton, D. (2005) The Asperger Love Guide: A Practical Guide for Adults with Asperger's Syndrome to Seeking, Establishing and Maintaining Successful Relationships. London: Paul Chapman Publishing.

Lawson, W. (2005) Sex, Sexuality and the Autism Spectrum. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

Stanford, A. (2003) Asperger Syndrome and Long-term Relationships. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.



lotusblossom
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27 Jan 2010, 4:58 am

moonnymph wrote:
Thank you for your list. Wonder what other people think of them, which of them people would recommend most.

TheMinnesotaIceman wrote:
I haven't read any of these (I got them from the bibliography of Tony Attwood's excellent book The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome), but they sound like they would be helpful, not just for aspie women, but for aspies in general. I was thinking of picking these up, myself.

Aston, M. (2003) Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

Edmonds, G. and Worton, D. (2005) The Asperger Love Guide: A Practical Guide for Adults with Asperger's Syndrome to Seeking, Establishing and Maintaining Successful Relationships. London: Paul Chapman Publishing.

Lawson, W. (2005) Sex, Sexuality and the Autism Spectrum. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

Stanford, A. (2003) Asperger Syndrome and Long-term Relationships. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.


maxine ashton books suck as she hates aspies and think we screw up NTs heads so avoid her books.

The wendy Lawson book is nice to read but not helpful in dating.

the one by Gen Edmonds is not good and has too obvious tips like to be clean on your date and its very expensive for what it is.

the Stanford book I would also advise against as its writen by an NT wife and focuses mainly on diagnostic criteria (so you can recognise if your husband has AS).

Ive read very many aspie relationships books and Ive not found any useful yet, they are mostly aimed at NT wives of aspie husbands and so not very useful for the woman with AS.

As far as dating is concerned I would say the Leil Lowndes book i suggested was by far the winner and for maintaining relationships I found DR Phil Macraws relationship rescue the most helpful.



Salonfilosoof
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27 Jan 2010, 9:00 am

moonnymph wrote:
Since everything is focused mostly on Aspie men, it is hard for Aspie women to find books that will also help them navigate the dating mine field. If anyone can suggest a dating book with a female prospective I would gladly appreciate it.


Just go to your local Aspie community and date some Aspie men. Most are single, they're more numerous than Aspie women and you're more likely to get along due to your Asperger's.

I really don't understand the dating problems of Aspie women :P