Mistaking acquaintances for friends

Post Reply New Topic

I guess I still have this issue. I have been talking to an NT online and I thought we were friends because we were chatting. Then she sees me calling her a friend out on the forum and tells me in PM thanks for calling her a friend. She thought we were just acquaintances. Yes this NT who fell for my April Fools joke and sent me PMs about it. Now we might meet because she is running away she says. She is coming up to my city. She doesn't live far.

Anyone here ever thought someone was your friend and then it turns out you two were just acquaintances?

I actually do not know the difference. And it has and will continue to get me into a great deal of trouble throughout my life......
I have little understanding of altering what i say in accordance with levels of intimacy....... bummer. All I have done since being properly diagnosed is try to shut up more so I do not offend.... And I seem to offend other people on the spectrum just as frequently as I offend people who are not on the spectrum................

Yeah, people I talked to on a music forum. Well someone was being nasty to me and they also turned on me. I had a few people that stood up for me though.
Screw people. I'm fine with just me and my cats, and my telescope.

I had that problem, working at the factory, back in the 90s. They kept talking about sex and drugs. I've realized what they were doing to me, and I've decided to find some older, more mature women to hang out with. I haven't had a problem, the rest of the time, that I was working there.

I have the opposite problem- people claiming me as a close friend when I'd hardly notice if they disappeared off the face of the planet.

I have always had it both ways. Most often the ones think of as friends find that a strange idea, but there are a few who think I am a great friend when I am just a nice guy they know. And then there id the thing where others seem to treat their friends the way I think of for casuals. Different strokes.

I think of everyone as an acquaintance unless they ever call me a friend. Then I just go with it. I don't know when it's okay to call someone a friend. Doesn't really phase me anyway.

my problem is just the opposite.

i think every person i've ever known has probably thought they were closer to me than they really are. i'm sure my "best friends" and family members would say we're quite close when from my perspective we're rather distant. after all i tell them just about nothing to do with my feelings or thoughts.

when it comes to acquaintances...well, they're often more trouble than they're worth. it seems everyone i meet decides that we're instant friends. it can be quite startling when they come up to me later and i can't really remember who they are. doesn't bother me with children but it is certainly off-putting to have someone pop up acting very familiar. can't say i understand what causes this as i'm not in general a friendly sort of person. oh, i'm nice enough but i don't go out of my way to smile and make conversation.

Funny, cause for me I'm always under the impression that those who are actually acquaintances are quickly becoming close buddies; yeah, I find out the hard way.....


I'd rate 90% of the people I know as simply acquaintances, even though many times I've called them (mistakenly) good friends.

Now of all the people I have talked to in PM as in chatting and having a conversation, I wonder if they were just acquaintances? Then I would get broken hearted when they stop talking I only had the courage about several times to send them a PM asking if I did anything wrong and if I did something wrong, sorry about that. I have thought about to just quit answering PMs so it won't keep happening but I always love making friends and chatting.

I am a total idiot about this stuff. I think I'm friends with people who don't even remember me and I have to go to great lengths to remind them who I am. I think we are still friends because they are still friends to me and I get the feeling from them that they really think the friendship ended years ago and maybe that we were never friends in the first place like I thought we were. I got this alot on facebook initially. I want to defriend people who add me then don't seem to want to talk to me at all.

I hate this friendship bullsh*t, honestly. I am a friend to someone and unless you do something really bad you are always my friend. Even if you do something really bad I still care about you and want good things to happen to you and for you to be happy. I don't understand people who can just write people off and forget about them. It's mentally taxing trying to figure it out.

what surprises me is that what we might consider doing something horrible, they don't always see it as that, then wonder why we're "being so ridiculous" about it or something.

A lot of hell has broken loose in my life because of that...and yet I still don't regret parting ways with those people.

The one thing I can never understand--and neither can my room mate for that matter--is why people don't just keep in touch with email, and the like. For instance you've seen on American Idol those people who become great friends while they're in line to audition; one goes thru, the other doesn't, and they part ways. Um...why?! !! !! !! !! !

Trade cell phone numbers and email addresses, I say! It ain't all that hard!

I never said a long-distance friendship was easy, but....so? I don' know...try, maybe?

If ya connected so deeply with the dude in line, then isn't it worth it to keep the friendship going? Many of my friends still live in my old state; we don't have all the time in the world these days to chat like we used to, but damned if that's gonna end our friendships or anything. We're still close, and it's all cool with me.

Yes. I've very often made the mistake of assuming acquaintances were friends.

This sort of thing really confuses me. I don't understand what a friend is, really. I guess someone you can trust not to go telling everyone your business. To me, most people are just acquaintances. Occasionally I'll mistake one for a friend or someone I can speak closely with. Then I'll say things I wish I hadn't.

I can make the distinction quite well. I have a couple people I can consider good friends. But everyone I talk to at school are just acquaintances. Bottom line, I always thought of it as such; if you don't know the person enough or hang out with them, they aren't really your friend.

What is the difference? Where does "acquaintance" stop and "friendship" begin?

For that matter, where does "stranger" stop and "acquaintance" begin?

I've never figured it out.