Sometimes overwhelmed mother of a 6 year old with Asperger's

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Bennhea86
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21 Nov 2010, 4:38 pm

I am new at this .
I am a single mother of a very unique, smart, loving little boy. I am also mother to a very charismatic 2 year old little girl, but every parent knows that the first child holds a special part in a parent's heart. I gave birth to Carter at a very young age. I say young, but 17 doesn't seem that young anymore. I am lucky to have wonderful parents that have supported me in all that I do. I remember, whenever I first laid eyes on him, he was this beautiful, round, chubby, little thing...I don't think that anything could ever live up to the love that I felt that day. I was so scared, because up until that point I had never even changed a diaper. And it did get easier over the next couple years. He was this sweet , loving toddler. He loved to be held and I loved to hold him. He was smart, because he had me convinced he couldn't walk, until one day..at month 18..he ran across the floor.
Carter was about 4 whenever I started noticing the changes. His whole demeaner changed. He was easily frustrated, he had a shorter fuse, he wasn't eating as much as he used to. Soon after that, he started having these horrible meltdowns. They were triggered by things like not getting exactly what he wanted, when he wanted it. I thought he was just being a brat, which by all means...he was, but I wasn't sure why it was happening.
Like I said before, I am lucky to have wonderful , supportive parents. My mother, which has been my rock in this whole ordeal, suggested that we get him assessed. Just like all parents, I was hesistant. I didn't want anything to be " wrong " with my baby. Shortly after that, Carter was diagnosed with ADHD. The meltdowns got a little better. The medicine took the " edge " off, and it was alot easier to manage.
Carter was about 5 whenever the thoughts and remarks about death appeared. I found it completely irrational to fathom that a small boy had thoughts of suicide. Even crazier, he talked about death as if it were no big deal. This raised a red flag for me and my parents, and we knew something else had to be wrong, very wrong.
We tried a few psychiatrists, but they wanted to slam Carter on medication after the first session. I believe that medication should only be used if it is absolutely needed. My father is an attorney, with many friends in the therapy profession. He referred me and my son over to Dr Hersch. He worked with both adults and children. A very nice man, and my son seemed to really click with him. I think Carter went to Dr Hersch every week for about a month and a half before the Dr told mentioned Asperger's for the first time. Me and my mother had never heard of it, so of course the first thing we did when we got home was reasearch it. For the first time in 5 years, things were starting to make sense. He had almost every one of the symptoms.
So, we were referred to a specialist. There is a place, about 45 minutes from where we live, that specializes in children on the autism spectrum. It is amazing how knowledge can make your life so much less stressful. He has regular therapy sessions with the therapist,and group therapy with children like him once a month. I wanted him to realize that he wasn't alone. DePelchin even referred us over to a special school that would cater to his needs specifically.
After all of this time, all of the tears and frustration, there seems to be a little light at the end of the tunnel.



CockneyRebel
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21 Nov 2010, 4:58 pm

Welcome to WrongPlanet.

The WP Kink


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kinftw
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21 Nov 2010, 6:38 pm

Welcome to Wrong Planet. :D



Alien_Papa
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27 Nov 2010, 12:53 am

I hope you'll continue to share your experience since many people come to WP with questions about similar situations.

Quote:
he had me convinced he couldn't walk, until one day..at month 18..he ran across the floor.


My Mom has always said exactly the same thing about me, although I have idea to what extent it's true.

She also says I never said a word until I spoke a complete sentence. Not sure how or why I did that, but that's what she says.

Quote:
We tried a few psychiatrists, but they wanted to slam Carter on medication after the first session.


Calms a kid
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DW_a_mom
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27 Nov 2010, 3:31 pm

Just the knowing makes such a huge difference. It will change how you view some of his behaviors, and that will help all of you.

I recommend reading the free pdf book one of our members wrote. It is on the last page of our recommended reading thread, in a post from the author, who goes by the screen name Tracker.


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