Suddenly being shut out

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I work with a girl my who is 28 and I am 29. She used to act like I was her close friend and even paid for things for me when she didn't have to. I also went to her wedding nearly a year and a half ago. However, when a new co-worker came into work last year, it was as if she ,totally shut me out of her life. Yet, she would tell me one story and I would listen to her and feed it to the other co-worker if she was mad at her but would cover up the truth by twisting her stories around and say things about me that were not true. Meanwhile, she was acting sweet to my face while suddenly bad mouthing me and lying to other co-workers about me. She even stopped telling things that there important in her life yet told everyone else and told them not to tell me. There have been two instances where she has told the others while urging them not to tell me because of some nasty lie.

I just don't understand her behavior and I don't comprehend as to why she would act like a friend one minute and then try to hurt me the next. Has anyone else on here experienced this kind of issue?

You're going to have to get away from these people. If you're talking about more than a couple people in all these posts, you are surrounded by sociopaths and should really just run away, change your name and start over some place else. If you're talking about the same people each time, you need to get away from them; they're toxic and scary.

People talk about each other behind their backs.
Now that you know about it you can stop associating with them.

I had a friend like that. She was 2 years older than me and she acted the same way that your friend is acting towards you. I got rid of her last year, and now she's trying to worm her way back into my group of friends.

I thought this sounded familiar, you posted about her before didn't you? I know it's rough when someone you thought of as a friend turns out not to be. It hurts, but she was never really your friend anyway, so you didn't really lose a friend, even though it feels that way.

(When I referred to she, I meant the friend and I should really edit this).

Wefunction- No, this is just one co-worker for me to stay away from and it's not multiple sociopaths. I am just appalled that my so-called friend who I trusted and enjoyed talking to would decide to stir things up about me like that. I mean, I feel that I did a lot of things for her and she pulls this. I really thought that she liked me on a casual friend level since we were always talking on the job. However, I had invited her to several things, and she always promised to come but never followed through with an excuse.

Bucephalus- When my friend was the one who got would get mad at the new co-worker supposedly for not doing her job or being too clingy. She would tell me over the new girl that things bothered her but never the new co-worker. So, I would feed that information back to the new co-worker, who would confirm it with me friend, where the story would get twisted. Meanwhile, this "Friend," came up and told me that her sister was pregnant with her second child from a different father who happened to be African American, while both my friend and her sister are Caucasian like myself. I explained to her that I was happy that she was going to be an aunt again and left it at that. Yet, I was also advised not to tell anyone and that I was her only good friend that she could rely on with this type of information. Two days later, however, my friend approached me and explained some girl with the same name and the same spelling who lived in her neighborhood was sending messages on FB saying that I was calling her sister an N** lover and an N*** whore. She explained to me that the new co-worker got confused and thought that it was me. My friend told me that she was sorry and that she would explain to the other girl what had happened. Yet, when I talked to the new co-worker, she had explained that my friend told her that I my friend's sister an e-mail saying that stuff. This new worker also went on to tell me that my friend informed everyone except me that her sister was pregnant except me and told everyone not to tell me because I didn't care for interracial relationships. The new girl continued to tell me that this friend went up to her and said that I was listening in on a phone conversation between her and her mother and that I approached her later on break and blurted out the news. The new girl was then told that my friend mentioned for me not to tell anyone or she would kick my butt.

You can shut her out too. That's for sure. It does suck that she's tainting other coworkers too.

That's the worst part of being an aspie. We can't win social games. Even when the other person is totally wrong, new people entering the situation usually fall on the side of the more socially adept person.

My advice would be to ignore all of this. Make her try harder to get to you. The best possible case is her trying so hard she loses her cool and confronts you directly. That's a situation we can win.

I did reject her because she had twisted a few stories on me and then kept leading me around relationship wise. I shut her out of my life after I found out that she was starting to shut me out of her own and lied like that. The way I shut her out was taking her and her husband off my list of friends on Facebook and then I would take her sister off when I had time. However, she chose to block me so that I couldn't see her on FB anymore even though I don't do anything. Yet, this sister sent me a message on FB telling me to mind my own damn business and stop acting like a child and took me off herself. I mean, things were so bad that I had to apologize to my friend's sister and tell her that I never sent those messages and that I loved interracial relationships and that I did not know where the information was coming from.

However, the odd part of all this was when we were friends, she had a sister-in-law who is a teenager and supposedly had problems with my friend and her husband while I seemed to get along with this in-law at their wedding. I like this girl so much that I decided to get to know her on facebook and even tagged her in some wedding photos. However, this friend told me that she and her husband were going to disown her therefore wanted me to remove her from my list of networks and remove all tagged photos. So I did what my friend said but noticed that she did not remove her in-law and so I thought that was sort of strange.

As for saying anything at work, I was going to anyway since the boss is very good at trying to cover her own skin and then blame me for absolutely everything. What makes her it even sadder is that she has a son with more severe Autism who cannot work at all and you think she would be more willing and able to advocate for people like myself and be a friend. Instead, she favors the other employee who is doing all the lying behind my back.

Thanks so much but it is hard work trying to cope with someone like that co-worker and I also think it's very sad since I once trusted her and would have counted her as a friend. Howevever, there were hints that she wasn't really all that interested in the first place. For one thing, I would invite her to things and she would make a commitment but stood me up several times with a rationalized excuse. The two common ones were that she had to take care of her husband or that she left her phone at home.