do you still have a black/white perspective?

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MrLoony
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12 May 2011, 6:24 pm

Are we talking morality? Because, for me, it's more like Blue and Orange:

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/M ... geMorality

I don't assume I'm right. I just assume that there is an absolute right answer. If you think it through, you can find that, in every decision you make, there will be one that provides the greatest benefit. You may not know it, but that doesn't make your decision any less wrong.


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13 May 2011, 5:59 am

I never had it in the first place.


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Nordlys
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13 May 2011, 11:00 am

I'm working to correct that, but some people think i still have B/W way of think


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13 May 2011, 1:46 pm

Nordlys wrote:
I'm working to correct that, but some people think i still have B/W way of think



People still think I am black and white. I can just stand there and start pointing out how I am not black and white but I always get lost at words and it take too long to explain and when i use a few examples I got, "Well at least you do know some areas" or "at least you're capable of knowing them."

But I haven't gotten that since 2009. I see it as this, everyone has some black and white views and perspectives, everyone has bias opinions. If I am black and white at times, that's okay because everyone is.



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13 May 2011, 2:31 pm

I have a black and white perspective on some things, but not all things. I can work on specific things, but then moving on to the next thing it's back to square one. It's actually frustrating because it makes it difficult to see why someone would disagree with me on a particular point.

I find it interesting on here that disagreement is sometimes characterized as black and white thinking, whether or not it is - or whether or not it's not a matter of being unable to see someone else's perspective, but finding that perspective extremely disagreeable - say, for example, debating the worthiness of my humanity on the basis of traits such as my sexual orientation, gender, economic class, disability, etc. I don't see much value in accepting the other person's perspective as valid, although this does not mean I am incapable of understanding it.

I do try to be open to what other people say and incorporate that into my worldview if possible, or at least understand it.

I also have trouble with "maybe" and actually have trouble with "I don't know." I would so much prefer "let me get back to you." A month or so before I was really looking at the idea that I was autistic I had a near-meltdown over a conversation with someone who answered me, "I don't know," and "maybe" as well as a third indeterminate answer that I could not interpret. I usually guess "no" when people do this, although of course that isn't always the case.



League_Girl
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13 May 2011, 2:49 pm

I have a hard time answering 'yes' or 'no to' a question if I don't know the answer. I say maybe as in "It's a possibility but I am not absolutely sure if I am right or not." Obviously they don't know the answer either and they are just guessing or speculating.

How can I get back to someone if I will never know the answer?



Verdandi
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13 May 2011, 3:31 pm

League_Girl wrote:
I have a hard time answering 'yes' or 'no to' a question if I don't know the answer. I say maybe as in "It's a possibility but I am not absolutely sure if I am right or not." Obviously they don't know the answer either and they are just guessing or speculating.

How can I get back to someone if I will never know the answer?


I am talking about questions that will have a concrete, absolute, yes/no answer such as "will you be going to the store today?" or "what do you want to eat for dinner?"

I do not love questions that will never have definitive answers, and I do appreciate that being stated explicitly rather than more vague answers such as "I don't know" or "maybe."



League_Girl
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13 May 2011, 4:12 pm

And I have a hard time with decisions and making up my mind and organization in my brain so I would probably drive you crazy with my problems I would have a hard time helping with.



Verdandi
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13 May 2011, 4:17 pm

League_Girl wrote:
And I have a hard time with decisions and making up my mind and organization in my brain so I would probably drive you crazy with my problems I would have a hard time helping with.


Yeah, I hear you.

I catch myself doing precisely the things that drive me up the wall from other people all the time. :oops:

My perspective is not so black and white that the irony is not lost on me.



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13 May 2011, 5:40 pm

Verdandi wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
And I have a hard time with decisions and making up my mind and organization in my brain so I would probably drive you crazy with my problems I would have a hard time helping with.


Yeah, I hear you.

I catch myself doing precisely the things that drive me up the wall from other people all the time. :oops:

My perspective is not so black and white that the irony is not lost on me.


Yep things I have a hard time with, I assume that is probably why others do it too and I often wonder if the problems I have are actually normal. Unless those people have disabilities too I don't know about.

After all I am not the only one with problems or just because someone looks normal doesn't mean they don't have any problems.



bee33
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13 May 2011, 9:51 pm

I tend to have black and white thinking over what I consider to be right and wrong. it's very hard for me to accept equivocation when it comes to issues of social justice and fairness. I think I have gotten better at understanding that other people can have a perspective that is different from mine, and not jumping down their throats, but that doesn't mean I necessarily understand their perspective.



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14 May 2011, 7:45 am

I used to, but not anymore. All I can say is that my AS got better as I got older.



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18 May 2011, 10:50 am

I don't think that my views on things like politics or morality could be described as 'black and white', but these are abstract matters that don't demand a great level of emotional involvement. When it comes to making decisions or judgements regarding personal affairs, I find it extremely difficult to detach myself from my rigid emotional convictions, and therefore tend to adopt a very 'black and white' view of things. An example would be thoughts of 'I'm useless' after I've made a mistake, or my tendency to feel that an entire plan is spoilt when one detail needs to be changed.



astaut
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18 May 2011, 11:30 am

My own black and white perspective has changed over the years. I'm not black and white about everything anymore. But when I ask other people things I still expect/want their answer to be straightforward/black and white.


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18 May 2011, 11:57 am

IceCreamGirl wrote:
I used to, but not anymore. All I can say is that my AS got better as I got older.


You are adapting.

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Verdandi
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18 May 2011, 12:14 pm

League_Girl wrote:
Yep things I have a hard time with, I assume that is probably why others do it too and I often wonder if the problems I have are actually normal. Unless those people have disabilities too I don't know about.

After all I am not the only one with problems or just because someone looks normal doesn't mean they don't have any problems.


Yeah, I know there are a lot of problems that aren't autism, and I'm generally sympathetic to them. I've been involved in disability stuff before I accepted I was autistic (and for a time thought it was just ADHD, before that just depression and anxiety).

I suspect some things autistics talk about might just be normal, but it's hard to tell without comparing a lot of notes sometimes.