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DoIHaveIt
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18 May 2011, 8:08 pm

Hi, I'm a 13 year old girl and Id like to know if its possible. Since I was young my mother has been convinced I have aspergers, and sent me to various psychologist, doctors, etc. I used to have a lot of symptoms when I was younger; I'd get headaches in quiet rooms, flip out about changes, I was obsessed about certain topics and I had very few friends. Now, I love going to loud parties and concerts. I attend all my school dances and love to socialize, and I have no difficulty doing it. I dont need neatness and order (my room right now.. oh my) and I make eye contact with others very well. Peoples eyes are usually what I notice first about them.
Im really not sure if I ever even had it, or if i was just a very weird kid. Ive never had an official diagnoses from a doctor, my mother just thinks i have it cuz my father is self diagnosed. What do you guys think

Thank you for your time(:



Mindslave
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18 May 2011, 8:10 pm

Yes, it's possible because I did it. I was told all my life that "it never goes away, it's with you forever!" as if it is some sort of disease. This wasn't my parents, this was at those disability boot camps. What do they know? I outgrew it. So the joke's on them.



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18 May 2011, 8:10 pm

I suppose it's possible if it was more mild. Headaches in quiet rooms? I haven't heard that one yet.


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LadybugQ
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18 May 2011, 8:14 pm

Simply put, no. Asperger's is not something that is "grown out of". It's like trying to outgrow the size of your ears or your nostrils. If your Mom seriously feels the need to have you tested professionally, then it's her money that is being spent. In the meantime, do your best to enjoy your teenage years - they are tough enough without being a Wrong Planet member on top of it all!


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DoIHaveIt
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18 May 2011, 8:15 pm

By that, Pensieve, I meant that even if the room was very quiet with only a few people, id have a "Sensory overload"
I agree, MindSlave!



mra1200
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18 May 2011, 8:21 pm

I suppose it's possible, but not very likely at your age without having been actively working on it since you were much younger. Taylor Morris is an example of someone who had that opportunity at a young age, and might seem otherwise normal now at around 18 now, IIRC (I think she was 17 in the video.)

I got into something that's been like a cognitive behavioural therapy, but it's taken me until my mid 30's to get to a point of maybe seemingly outwardly normal. I'm still a bit of a mess, but I have some of the basic social conventions down, but I still have a hell of a time keeping friends around me for an extended period.


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draelynn
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18 May 2011, 8:25 pm

I found, as I got older, my tolerance and ability to handle more and more input grew. I WANTED to socialize as a teenager so I actively adapted to soical situations. looknig back, I mirrored alot of behaviors from those around me. I learned about body language. I purposely went out to make myself less naive when I realized 'Hey ,everyone else seems to know this stuff.' I definitely didn't get it all right but I learned enough that my quirks were chalked up to personality and originality.

It seems some of those with AS can overcome the difficulties to varying degrees but that core Aspie point of view never leaves.



LP0rc
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18 May 2011, 8:26 pm

The long answer, with how your brain is wired and the size of your working set, and the resulting bias in how you approach things, is no.

The short answer, yes. You learn behaviors, develop skills, and the Disorder part falls away. You'll never completely be like the other monkeys, but you can live and move among them freely.



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18 May 2011, 8:27 pm

You can't "outgrow" AS. However, you can learn better adaptation, and learn social skills consciously that you haven't naturally picked up subconsciously. Thus you may give the outward appearance of having "outgrown" AS by the time you are an adult, but the underlying issues will still be there.


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18 May 2011, 8:37 pm

You can't outgrow AS. You can, however, outgrow a misdiagnosis and many seem to do just that. Consider yourself lucky to be among them.



USMCnBNSFdude
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18 May 2011, 8:55 pm

You can't outgrow it, but you can lessen it's severity a great deal. When I was 7, I was the most obvious aspie. Everyone would look at me and think "What the hell is up with that boy?". Now, no one can tell that I have AS, and they're shocked when I tell them.



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18 May 2011, 8:59 pm

No, it is not possible to 'outgrow' AS. Symptoms can become less troublesome in time, however.



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18 May 2011, 9:19 pm

It isn't possible. You probably never had it to begin with.


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Ilka
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18 May 2011, 9:21 pm

As you were never diagnosed and your father self-diagnosed, probably you never had it to start with. I do not thing Asperger's is something you can outgrow. My daughter has been in therapy for three years, and she is doing way better, but I know she will always have "traits". My husband does. I do not thing you should worry about it, anyway, since apparently you are doing great. Enjoy!



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18 May 2011, 9:25 pm

SammichEater wrote:
It isn't possible. You probably never had it to begin with.


Yep.

The following are dead give-aways:

-I'd get headaches in quiet rooms
-I had very few friends.
-I love going to loud parties and concerts.

If she had headaches in quiet rooms (Which is definitely not aspie), then she would've developed headaches during that daily quiet reading time during elementary school, and she would've been too crabby to have a lot of friends. So, that explains that. And, loving "loud parties and concerts" as a young teen is decidedly not aspie.

Also, she never mentions that she was ever officially diagnosed, only that her mother was highly suspicious and she saw leagues of doctors/therapists to presumably address her oddities.



jrjones9933
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18 May 2011, 9:38 pm

We don't understand the mechanism of Autism, or the brain itself in many ways. I like to believe in infinite possibilities.

If you don't meet the diagnostic standard, you don't have it by definition.

That said, if someone else will pay for you to talk about any problems you might have with a therapist, take full advantage of it while it lasts! That's only if you have an ethical and useful therapist, of course. One of my friends told me his therapist used to give him advice on how to handle his parents, since he didn't think my friend was the one with a problem. :wink:


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