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League_Girl
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05 Oct 2011, 1:44 am

twich wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
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Anyone who is knowingly an a*hole and uses asperger's as an excuse, they're just a*holes like NT's can be, or some autists can be... But I for one try really hard not to be, and when people who assume things like this don't point out I'm saying something socially unacceptable, I probably don't realize it's not ok, and I can't learn if someone doesn't tell me it's wrong. This note was a little on the rude side for me, not because I have asperger's, but because I'm quite offended- Yours was much more rude.



I didn't find anything rude in this post at all.



Thank you. I tend to just keep my mouth shut now because of all the times I've been told I'm rude for standing up for something I don't agree about. I can't tell the difference because everyone seems to get offended and call me a jerk if I don't agree. This next part will probably rude and a*holish because I've had time to think and I'm still insulted, sorry.


I would take it as a compliment. They can't handle that you can stand up for yourself so they must try and make you feel bad by calling you a jerk. Don't believe them. Just wear the J word as a badge. That's what i do with the word bully when people think I am one when I stand up for myself. I decided to just embrace the word and wear it like a badge. Maybe take it as a compliment too.

If standing up for myself is bullying, then bullying isn't always a bad thing because it can be a good thing. So being a jerk can be a good thing too if it means standing up for yourself.



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05 Oct 2011, 8:29 am

Autism ruins lives, destroys families, etc.

If you really can't understand why people think that autism is a "bad thing", you don't know what autism is. Yes, I'm sure you can rattle off DSM criteria...but you don't know what autism is.



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05 Oct 2011, 11:59 am

Nothing good comes out of Autism, unless you're clever and ambitious and able to focus on what you want to do for the rest of your life, ie your special interest.


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05 Oct 2011, 3:00 pm

I've gone back and forth and back and forth and back and forth on responding to this...

First of all, the poster who wrote the antagonizing post was clearly overly harsh and inconsiderate. AS is as much "real" autism as any other form of autism is.

That said, I run into a good many people with AS who profess that they are just "differently wired" and "not disabled." So, they say, "AUTISM ISN'T A DISABILITY!" This is where I take issue with their ideas. You see, if you run around spreading the word that people with autism don't have a disability, you're really screwing it up for some of us. I need staff, and my staff is through the state. I need transportation through the state to get to medical appointments, as I don't drive or take the bus. I need medical insurance through the state in order to stay both alive and out of the hospital. I can't take care of myself, manage my finances or balance my checkbook, I don't know what medicine to take when I'm sick. I don't know how to clean or cook without direction from someone, step by step.

I say all this because how can you say I'm not disabled by my autism? And don't even get me started on things like people saying "But in a predominately autistic society..." Yeah. Who would take care of me?!

So for me, that's the portion of the poster's ideas that I understand. I think we all need to be more careful about speaking only for ourselves and the language we use.



League_Girl
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05 Oct 2011, 4:02 pm

I also can't stand when people say autism isn't a disability or AS. It's great they feel that way about themselves and have found ways to adapt or accept who they are despite their struggles. But they are lying to themselves. It be like me saying I don't have a disability just because I feel that way about myself. But I know I have a disability so I say I do. It be like a dyslexic person saying dyslexia isn't a disability just because they are living normal lives and gotten a college degree and can read fine and not do spelling errors or poor grammar because they had learned despite the fact they still read slower than others and still see words out of place and still get them turned around. Heck even a blind person can say they blindness isn't a disability just because they are living fine and are happy with themselves and don't care about the fact they can't see.

Not everyone with autism is disabled just like people with other disabilities aren't disabled, not all of them I mean. Even some people in wheelchairs feel that way too about themselves.

Sometimes I do feel disabled because of limitations I face in life or will.



cyberdad
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05 Oct 2011, 8:07 pm

SuperTrouper wrote:
I've gone back and forth and back and forth and back and forth on responding to this...

First of all, the poster who wrote the antagonizing post was clearly overly harsh and inconsiderate. AS is as much "real" autism as any other form of autism is.

That said, I run into a good many people with AS who profess that they are just "differently wired" and "not disabled." So, they say, "AUTISM ISN'T A DISABILITY!" This is where I take issue with their ideas. You see, if you run around spreading the word that people with autism don't have a disability, you're really screwing it up for some of us. I need staff, and my staff is through the state. I need transportation through the state to get to medical appointments, as I don't drive or take the bus. I need medical insurance through the state in order to stay both alive and out of the hospital. I can't take care of myself, manage my finances or balance my checkbook, I don't know what medicine to take when I'm sick. I don't know how to clean or cook without direction from someone, step by step.

I say all this because how can you say I'm not disabled by my autism? And don't even get me started on things like people saying "But in a predominately autistic society..." Yeah. Who would take care of me?!

So for me, that's the portion of the poster's ideas that I understand. I think we all need to be more careful about speaking only for ourselves and the language we use.


It's all a matter of perspective then. Social values and culture do determine norms. Anything outside of those norms are considered "deviations".

In an ideal society people are valued regardless of their potential contribution. Contribution to Survival was something our tribal ancestors determined was critical for the survival of the group. In our modern society families and carers can help a person who is not able to function independently. If functional impairment is a disability then so be it. In the end it still comes down to social values and what we as individuals and as a community determine to be important.



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05 Oct 2011, 8:21 pm

It's because it is a bad thing. No one wants it. It's something you tolerate.



swbluto
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06 Oct 2011, 12:13 am

Ai_Ling wrote:
Because autism is a disorder mostly revolved around a lack in social communication, the inability to communicate and relate to others. Apparently, as Im learning from a textbook for speech, social communication is vital to societal function. For people that have other disorders such as Down Syndrome, NTs probably find them easier to work with and more loveable people. While us autistics, have limited ability to connect to NTs and are often off in our own little worlds. People who are seen as unsociable and aloof and looked down upon by society.

Unfair but true. But many people are working to destigmatize autism, its gonna take a lot of work but one day....who knows when. I think we're all gonna be either dead or old by the time that happens.


Yep. It's true, society generally values sociability and social ability more than academics. If you lack that, then you really are a "loser".

Because of this, someone with downs syndrome wins the hearts of others, something an aspie robot cannot do. If you cannot win other people's hearts, then you're not really going to gain sympathy and it'd be looked down upon that much more.



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10 May 2013, 7:34 am

because they're stupid. i hope a cure NEVER comes. it would be like the Soviets blowing us out with nukes if that happened.



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10 May 2013, 8:31 am

Many people still see it from a disease model rather than a support model. Yes, autism may come with challenges, but it is not exclusively a bad thing or something that has to be eliminated from the population, because it comes with many strengths and gifts. It is just a different way of thinking and percieving the world. There really should be more focus...especially from a research standpoint...on supportive environments and therapies to support people on all ends of the spectrum.


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This misdiagnosis caused me significant stress, which lessened upon finding out the truth about myself from my current and past long-term psychiatrists - that I am a highly sensitive person but do not have an autism spectrum disorder

My diagnoses - anxiety disorder, depression and traits of obsessive-compulsive disorder (all in remission).

I’m no longer involved with the ASD world.


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10 May 2013, 9:05 am

MimiR wrote:
He's truly autistic, not I'm-Asperger's-so-that-excuses-me-being-an-a*hole, and he has come far enough to understand just how far behind the average person he is in so many ways that matter.


I think this illustrates part of the answer. For someone with Downs Syndrome, their disability is cleary obvious. I'm sure there are other reasons also, but it has been my experience that because I look "normal", I am expected to act "normal". If I don't I am choosing to be a "a*hole", or am purposely trying to hurt sombody.

I have a girlfriend who thinks because I can - with great effort - function fairly well in the outside world, I am a jerk if I let down my guard around her. If I don't perform the "normal act" with her too I am using Asperger's as an "excuse" to be bad. Which leaves me with no safe haven at all.

I am very tired of hearing that kind of crap.



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10 May 2013, 9:22 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
There are people out there who have this idea that the more sociable a person is, the better off they are. I don't really like that old school thinking. I dream of a world where everybody is accepted as they are, and not just the people who are more sociable. I also think that those people have seen the movie Rain Man one time too many and they all think that we're all as severe as that character.


I whole heartedly agree with this. Because if they see you not responding in the way they are used to, they think you are stupid or unintelligent. I hope that other sources of intelligence will be measure in the future. And fields would open where it would be used properly and to the benefit of all. (idealistic I know)



League_Girl
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10 May 2013, 12:14 pm

Well if you look at the severe cases, that is why people want a cure to it. All disabilities get seen as bad and diseases and obesity. That is why parents are always hoping for a normal child. It doesn't matter how mild the condition is or how mild people have it, people still wish for a normal child. NTs can have it bad too and still suffer without a disability but it's human nature to want something normal and even animals are the same way too and they abandon their young when something isn't right and we don't because we're human and have knowledge but back in the days we did and then we had institutions.

But the main focus right now is autism. I wonder what their next focus be?


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10 May 2013, 12:45 pm

League_Girl wrote:
I also can't stand when people say autism isn't a disability or AS. It's great they feel that way about themselves and have found ways to adapt or accept who they are despite their struggles. But they are lying to themselves. It be like me saying I don't have a disability just because I feel that way about myself. But I know I have a disability so I say I do. It be like a dyslexic person saying dyslexia isn't a disability just because they are living normal lives and gotten a college degree and can read fine and not do spelling errors or poor grammar because they had learned despite the fact they still read slower than others and still see words out of place and still get them turned around. Heck even a blind person can say they blindness isn't a disability just because they are living fine and are happy with themselves and don't care about the fact they can't see.

Not everyone with autism is disabled just like people with other disabilities aren't disabled, not all of them I mean. Even some people in wheelchairs feel that way too about themselves.

Sometimes I do feel disabled because of limitations I face in life or will.


Yes, I agree. Autism is a disability just like any other, like Schizophrenia and blindness and intellectual disability. It's different from these things and other disabilities but it's a disability, a disorder. Of course there are strengths that come with AS. When something goes wrong in brain wiring during development the brain enhances other connections in order to compensate sometimes. Blind people have superior verbal skills (vocabulary) on average. They might compensate for their disability and live happy lives but they still have a disability. Same with autism and I really think people are lying to themselves if they think otherwise.

Disability doesn't have to be such a horrible thing. It can be just a part of life that we have to compensate for and accept in our society.



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10 May 2013, 2:04 pm

I don't see it as such a bad thing, its more how you get treated if you come off weird which might happen if you have autism and stupid social difficulties like not being able to start a conversation with someone I don't know. I have worse things than autism anyways so I usually see that as the least of my worries.


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10 May 2013, 2:34 pm

MagicMeerkat wrote:
If Autism Speaks is moving away from finding the gene for autism and promoting genocide, why then do people still think autism is such a bad thing? Autism Speaks simply promoted the idea autism was a bad thing, they didn't make it up themselves. LF autism, I might understand why people think it's a bad thing but just look at people like myself and Temple Grandin who were more severely affected as childen but became "better" as they learned more skills as they grew. Some parents admit feeling upset when their child is diagnosed with Asperger's. Some even admit their kids have a very high IQ, yet they still admit they would cure their child if they could. People seem to have higher opions of people with Down's Syndrome than they do people with autism. Is it becuase people with Down's Syndrome are more socialble and easy going? Why is autism such a bad thing to many people?


One thing, and one thing only: Propaganda

People are so caught up in all the b.s. that has become common opinion about ASD's that they have started ignoring that we're people and not some lab experiment (which isn't new, but they've gone too far lately from the whole "Adam Lanza" b.s. and the media pointing it's slimy fingers at us). Actually if we were lab experiments, people might regard us all with certain respect (pretty sad).
Common people no longer form their own opinions through real fact, it's all based from what their friends tell them, which is exactly what their friends do when they hear it. So before we can say "uh, hold on a d*mn minute", we've got hundreds of people ready to scream at us over rumor and no real facts in the world will change their ignorant minds because they think they know everything, and if proven wrong they'll look like total idiots. They'd rather persecute other people than admit they're wrong... pretty f*ed up huh.


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