'Watch your tone!'

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My voice is very expressive, but I've noticed it becomes much more flatline when I'm stressed or on the verge of an emotional meltdown.
Can totally identify with being told I sound like a know-it-all.

It is very hard when people make up inner emotional states or feelings and assign them to you, as opposed to listening to the content of what you're saying.

I mumble. My voice is deep but still rather young, kinda slurry. And Canadian.

my problem is I get accused of being mouthy.

I've never been told I have a monotonous voice, but I am frequently being told I am talking too loudly.

Yeah, different people say different things about my voice. I guess I've learned to 'put on' different ways of talking.

One thing is to record your voice in conversation with friends or family. Then you can hear what you sound like, and others can possibly point specific things out—"Here you just sound angry."

I talk loud and I get offended when people think I am yelling at them or being rude.

I can't remember the last time I was told to watch my voice or tone. I can also remember only one time when my husband said I was yelling at him and I said I wasn't because my voice wasn't raised and he said "it's your tone."

I also remember another time when I was 11, we were all on our summer trip. I was sitting up front with dad and because it was loud up there because of the engine (we were using an old RV from the 70's an the windows were open, I talked loud intentionally so my dad could hear me and mom woke up from her nap and yelled at me and punished me for it). She thought I was screaming at him than talking loud so he can hear me.


I thought people would tell the difference between angry loud voice and happy loud voice.

I can be loud sometimes but the same goes for the rest of my family and they don´t have Aspergers as far as I know. It´s just a family trade I suppose.

I've often been told I'm talking too loud, or that I sound rude. Yet I don't know it. To me, I just sound fine. I don't know what's wrong when I talk, and I'll admit, sometimes I feel a little offended when I'm told I'm talking too loud or rude.

My dad would always say that to me when I was in my early years of adolescence and my voice was getting deeper and my accent more noticeable.

I have this problem myself and it is happening with almost everyone I talk to and I can't quite figure out what is going on. I have never been diagnosed with Autism or Aspergers, but I know how annoying it is to be called out on it because it happens to me quite often to tell you the truth. I just tell them that I am not angry or upset. But that doesn't seem to help at all. This situation happened when I lived with roommates, customers, and even my own family points it out. They even get their feelings hurt when I am not doing anything and I am just talking to them. Also I am often accused of being mean due to my tone. It is a sad feeling for me to deal with people who don't seem to understand me. My tone of voice is part of who I am and I cannot change it. I feel like people just want me to change to please them but this I will not do. Yeah I heard it a lot like I said and I am sick of it. I wish it would they would stop saying it to me, but I guess it is the people I am with and who are acting like complete strangers to me. There have been people that told me to calm down when I wasn't even upset at all.

I have a rather monotonous voice, and people tend to tune me out when I'm talking to them.

I think I am overly expressive in my tone. People impose a range of emotions on me that they think I am when I think I am just calm and neutral. It's very frustrating and I think the reason I've lost a lot of friends. I have no idea what happens but I see them react and scoot away from me, never to return a call again. On the phone people think I'm a little kid, and in person people often tell me I have a cartoon voice.

This is an area where many Aspies have considerable difficulty, myself among them.

It has been a corrective emotional experience to observe my spouse's interactions with other people and even with our cats. He has a soothing quality, and I can see how this raises hackles much less than my direct, to-the-point communication. By emulating his style, I believe I have actually improved somewhat in my "tone." (I still get criticism sometimes, though.)