spoiled brat!

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Does anyone here get treated as if you're just being a spoiled brat because you can't do things that other people can? I know everyone has to struggle in life to get to where they want to be, but having Asperger's/Autism makes accomplishing these goals 100 times harder than the average person. When I try to explain what it's like to have Asperger's, they simply say that everyone feels that way. Well, of course they do, but does it keep them from living their lives? Do they stay indoors because they simply don't want to deal with all the stress and noises that come with everyday life? No, they go on and they do what they have to do in order to survive. They simply don't get it, and it frustrates me. The other day I was explaining Asperger's Syndrome to my best friend, who doesn't know much about it by the way. She flat out told me, "I don't think you have Asperger's". Really? You don't know anything about it and you're telling me I don't have it? What a load of bulls**t. She also asked me, "I thought people with Asperger's didn't know that they had it?". I told her no, that a lot of people are aware that they may have it. We are our own best friend and our worst enemy, we know ourselves better than anyone because we have had so much time to get to know our own quirks, likes and dislikes. So when we research Asperger's, a lot of us tend to say Holy s**t, that's me! Sigh, if only people understood that I'm not trying to be difficult. All I've ever wanted was to become independent and not have to be a burden to anyone. I'm working on it, but it's going to be one hell of a ride.

Lot of people don't understand problems. I don't even bother to tell people about mine. Reading all the stuff online about lazy people and how people find the easy way out and how they went through it bla bla bla gives me the idea what they would think of me. People are just too ignorant. So I don't really get treated like I am a spoiled brat really because I don't tell anyone about my issues.


I was called spoiled as a child though by other kids and I was called one by my dad's cousin when I was 15.

Last edited by League_Girl on 27 Jan 2012, 4:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Yes – I get told quite often that I'm a spoiled little brat and it bothers me. To a degree there are some valid points to that due to family circumstance when I was child, but mostly I do want to gain a semblance of independence but it's also a balance of actually acknowledging the areas I need help with. Now I'm coming to terms with the fact that some will always call me spoiled no matter what I attempt, though it still causes a fair share of frustration.

So yeah, I know what you mean.

Yes the whole you're not trying hard enough approach...I swear if I had a quarter for every time someone tried to say that or otherwise indicate I'm just 'spoiled' and don't actually have any problems I would have quite a lot of money. So yeah I know what you mean and I know how frustrating it can be.

Yeeeeeup. All the time. Get's on my nerves hardcore.

My title says I'm a brat. Well, maybe a spoiled one...

I think I don't get called a spoiled brat very often. People only imply that I'm one or are telling me I'm a difficult case. They think all of my quirks (issues with keeping tidy my flat, not clothing according to the latest standards, not going to places / venues "everyone" goes to, not socializing with my co-workers enough, hating certain noises and smells, and most importantly, not socializing actively to have a girlfriend etc. etc.) are simply my fault, because I willfully don't do what other people do (i.e. conforming to stupid rules). They fail to understand that not all of this stuff is purposefully chosen by me.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txhaQ6D4IKs[/youtube]

No, I'm not being facetious. I mean this with all sincerity.

Listen especially to the chorus.

Yer in good company.

Now, repeat after me:

LOL thanks mrXxx, that was actually pretty funny

That this person thought that those with AS didn't know they had it tells me that she doesn't know very much about AS. You probably shouldn't take her opinions into account very much. If you did, it would be kind of silly--like trusting a four-year-old to teach you how to drive! Obviously, if she doesn't know about AS, her opinions about it aren't particularly relevant.

Sort of a side note to the topic, but I've had a problem with this my entire life. I can't dismiss other people's opinions, even when I know they clearly don't understand what they are talking about (which is sometimes hard for me to determine anyway). If a four year old commented on my driving ability, I'd probably take it to heart.

Anyway...yes I've been called "spoiled". My own family has called me that and I always answered, "Well if you think I'm spoiled, WHO do you think spoiled me?" They never had an answer to that one.

I find it stupid that some seem to belittle others' problems. It would be one thing to go with the old "there are starving families in third world countries", but there are a few conceited ******** who seem to think that they've had it the hardest and that nobody else has come close. Everybody has hardships; just because they are different does not mean they are any more or less of a personal problem. Evven reality can be subjective.

@ Callista: Thanks, her assumption about me not having Asperger's was irritating, but I know I shouldn't rely on her opinion. Some people just don't understand the extent of this syndrome simply because most of my freakouts happen when I'm all by myself. Growing up I was really quiet (practically mute) in school, and at home I was hyperactive, loved solitude, and didn't share emotions with my family or let them hug me. They all knew there was something different about me, and now that I'm almost positive I have Asperger's, I let them know and they just told me I was lazy and spoiled. I was like WTF! I even tried to explain the symptoms to them but they just denied everything. I was NEVER able to share anything with my family, so you can imagine my anger and frustration when I tried to reach out to them only to have them dismiss my feelings.

@Boxman108: Exactly! I realize there are people suffering from way worse things in life, but everyone has their problems. This is my hardship, and although I can overcome this (I hope) it's been so tough! I've had to teach myself a lot about life because my family was so damn dysfunctional. There was no structure, we all did whatever the hell we wanted pretty much.

LOL Saaaame here. Like I mentioned, I grew up in a dysfunctional family. My family thinks that because they had to take extra care of me (I almost got hit by a car once and one time I took off with a friend after school without telling anyone) that that makes me "spoiled". I was really naive, excuse me for needing to be taken care of as a young child. Oh yeah, I'm sooo spoiled. They never have a good answer either.

I feel like I had a very similar experience to you growing up, except my family has all been pretty understanding. In fact, my mom was the one who came up with the idea that I had AS last year, at 26!

However, re: being thought of as spoiled. Honestly, the opinion I have the most trouble with is my own. I'm pretty new to the idea that my dysfunction and idiosyncracies might have an actual physiological root cause...it's really hard to break the habit of beating myself up for being lazy, melodramatic, whiny, etc.

I think I actually am a spoiled brat.

In my opinion and experience, it's usually a bad idea to tell people you have Aspergers. I tend to only tell people who are REALLY close to me, or who I know would get it and everything like that.