How do I ask for this woman's address without seeming eager?

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Alienboy
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07 Mar 2012, 11:30 am

anna-banana wrote:
did she say that explicitly Alienboy?

if she did, my guess is she's expecting you to suggest a hotel.


Yes she specifically said you are really sexy. I want to have sex with you. Those were her words. Alright that sounds like a better idea. It would have to be a nice hotel of course. Not some dingy s**thole motel. Would even inviting her to a nice hotel make her seem like I'm treating her like a prostitute? That is the main reason why I usually refrained from the hotel dates in the past. For you ladies on here. If a guy that you wanted to have sex with invited you to a hotel...wouldn't you seem at least a little bit whorish? That was a serious question.


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anna-banana
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07 Mar 2012, 11:37 am

Alienboy wrote:
anna-banana wrote:
did she say that explicitly Alienboy?

if she did, my guess is she's expecting you to suggest a hotel.


Yes she specifically said you are really sexy. I want to have sex with you. Those were her words. Alright that sounds like a better idea. It would have to be a nice hotel of course. Not some dingy s**thole motel. Would even inviting her to a nice hotel make her seem like I'm treating her like a prostitute? That is the main reason why I usually refrained from the hotel dates in the past. For you ladies on here. If a guy that you wanted to have sex with invited you to a hotel...wouldn't you seem at least a little bit whorish? That was a serious question.


ah well, whoever here isn't guilty of casual sexual relationships with randomly met strangers, both online and offline, cast the first stone! sure isn't going to be me ;)

first of all, if she said something like this to you online before she even met you in person, I don't think she would consider anything "whorish" (and I mean it in the nicest of ways). if I were you, I'd have a look around for nice hotels in the area, don't book it though. if at the end of the night you make out and it's looking promising, suggest the hotel. if she suggests you go to her place, all the better. if she wants to part ways, leave it at that and hope she sees you again.

also, don't treat whatever she might have said online as a contract, or a promise of any kind. remember you haven't even properly met yet!


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Alienboy
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07 Mar 2012, 11:42 am

anna-banana wrote:
Alienboy wrote:
anna-banana wrote:
did she say that explicitly Alienboy?

if she did, my guess is she's expecting you to suggest a hotel.


Yes she specifically said you are really sexy. I want to have sex with you. Those were her words. Alright that sounds like a better idea. It would have to be a nice hotel of course. Not some dingy s**thole motel. Would even inviting her to a nice hotel make her seem like I'm treating her like a prostitute? That is the main reason why I usually refrained from the hotel dates in the past. For you ladies on here. If a guy that you wanted to have sex with invited you to a hotel...wouldn't you seem at least a little bit whorish? That was a serious question.


ah well, whoever here isn't guilty of casual sexual relationships with randomly met strangers, both online and offline, cast the first stone! sure isn't going to be me ;)

first of all, if she said something like this to you online before she even met you in person, I don't think she would consider anything "whorish" (and I mean it in the nicest of ways). if I were you, I'd have a look around for nice hotels in the area, don't book it though. if at the end of the night you make out and it's looking promising, suggest the hotel. if she suggests you go to her place, all the better. if she wants to part ways, leave it at that and hope she sees you again.

also, don't treat whatever she might have said online as a contract, or a promise of any kind. remember you haven't even properly met yet!


Yeah I should just hangout with her and see how things go. She seems interested enough. If she changes her mind then oh well. There are a lot of women in the world right? She at least got a good look at me on my webcam and showed interest. She told me I can text her anytime. So those are really good signs right?


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Alienboy
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07 Mar 2012, 11:46 am

Oh yeah as a side question...if she gave me her number last night and said I can text her anytime...when would be a good time? It is 8:45am here in southern California and I am pretty sure that is too early for a text. I would just say something like "good morning" but would I still seem too anxious contacting her so early? Would 10 or 11 am sound a bit more normal?


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Midori
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07 Mar 2012, 12:00 pm

Okay, so there seems to be mutual consent at this time, if I'm following this correctly. I still think there should be an initial meeting in a public place- i.e. a cafe- but for your OWN safety as well, to ensure that she is who her profile says she is (this is not a point I would explicitly bring up with her). Not everyone has the best intentions.

In my experience, Japanese people are pretty direct when it comes to sexytimes (having lived over there for a while)- I know that's a generalizing statement. Asking leading questions is hardly timid. If she want you to come over she'll pretty much tell you.

ETA- Ah, webcam- missed that post, my bad. I'd wait till maybe noon or one to text, if you're really intent on texting today- like you're just sending something off on your lunch break. Can't help you with the hotel=whorish? question since I need to build up a lot of trust to get that far. It's probably an unfair assessment that will get you slapped if you bring it up to her though.



Last edited by Midori on 07 Mar 2012, 12:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Alienboy
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07 Mar 2012, 12:00 pm

Hmm...maybe my last question was really stupid haha.


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hyperlexian
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07 Mar 2012, 12:06 pm

ok, so i think this is the part you are not getting. just because she said she wants to have sex with you does NOT give you permission to have sex with her. she may still say no at any time, even if you are already naked in bed. so her address will not help you to have sex with her. it is not a golden ticket. if she gives you her address, will you show up there with no invitation?


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Alienboy
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07 Mar 2012, 12:24 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
ok, so i think this is the part you are not getting. just because she said she wants to have sex with you does NOT give you permission to have sex with her. she may still say no at any time, even if you are already naked in bed. so her address will not help you to have sex with her. it is not a golden ticket. if she gives you her address, will you show up there with no invitation?


No I will not show up at her house without permission. Yeah I understand what you are saying. Like Midori, I lived in Japan for a while and he is totally right about Japanese women being really open about meeting for sex. They are not as shy as everyone thinks they are once you get to know them. I will not treat her inviting me over or saying she wants sex as a golden ticket. I am just saying she sounded pretty convincing and excited about having sex with me.


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Midori
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07 Mar 2012, 12:35 pm

Quote:
Like Midori, I lived in Japan for a while and she is totally right about Japanese women being really open about meeting for sex.


Fixed that for you. 8)



Alienboy
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07 Mar 2012, 12:40 pm

Midori wrote:
Quote:
Like Midori, I lived in Japan for a while and she is totally right about Japanese women being really open about meeting for sex.


Fixed that for you. 8)


Oh crap I'm sorry haha.


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jim_jones
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07 Mar 2012, 5:23 pm

Well I'm qualified to cast the first stone.....but I won't, although chatting once on a webcam and then hooking up seems kinda creepy to me.



tsukaima
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07 Mar 2012, 8:30 pm

This one's pretty easy, honestly.

"Where would you like me to pick you up"... is non-threatening and gives her the option of somewhere nearby to her home but not actually her home.

If she says "At home", THEN it is totally appropriate to ask for an address or directions.



Alienboy
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08 Mar 2012, 12:00 pm

tsukaima wrote:
This one's pretty easy, honestly.

"Where would you like me to pick you up"... is non-threatening and gives her the option of somewhere nearby to her home but not actually her home.

If she says "At home", THEN it is totally appropriate to ask for an address or directions.


Its funny that you mention this because I was thinking about just asking like this. You are right. It comes off as totally natural. I will just ask her this way. :D


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Alienboy
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08 Mar 2012, 12:01 pm

jim_jones wrote:
Well I'm qualified to cast the first stone.....but I won't, although chatting once on a webcam and then hooking up seems kinda creepy to me.


Yeah, we both decided to get to know each other a little more before deciding to meet up. I talked to her a few times and she wants to talk with me more later tonight, so that is good at least. I slowed down with trying to meet with her to avoid seeming desperate to her.


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