Dating as a Girl with Asperger's Syndrome???

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thehipsternerdette
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26 Mar 2012, 10:49 am

Hi!

I'm twenty years old, and never have been on a date or had a real boyfriend because of my social awkwardness, interests and difficulties in the dating scene. I am a minimalist and have very "questionable" behaviour. I have been called crazy, psychotic and weird. I was bullied when I was little. I have major trust issues around men mostly because of being sexually harassed and used in the past and such. As bad as it sounds, my guy friend gets pleasure out of seeing me naked although he is "seeing someone, although it's not serious". What can I do to be more sociable so that trustworthy guys will actually want to date me? Any advice?



muslimmetalhead
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26 Mar 2012, 12:12 pm

You're not a girl, you're a woman.

Sorry to get technical but it bugs me.


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muslimmetalhead
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26 Mar 2012, 12:14 pm

You're not a girl, you're a woman.

Sorry to get technical but it bugs me.


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Alexender
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26 Mar 2012, 12:17 pm

Well I would call her a girl, not a woman. Stop trying to derail this thread


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CrazyStarlightRedux
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26 Mar 2012, 2:55 pm

You need a friend that doesn't treat you like that for starters, as well as a guy who is similar to you.

The guy needs to not be interested in the sexual aspect too.

Hope this helps as I know how it feels (except the naked part).


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muslimmetalhead
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26 Mar 2012, 4:46 pm

Alexender wrote:
Well I would call her a girl, not a woman. Stop trying to derail this thread



I'm not trying. It just comes out that way.


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thehipsternerdette
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26 Mar 2012, 7:03 pm

Thanks for the constructive advice everybody! It really helps. :D



Wolfheart
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27 Mar 2012, 2:29 am

I agree with Starlight, he doesn't sound like a great friend and seems like he is taking advantage of you because you can, maybe because he thinks you are naive and that he can have you without making a serious commitment. It sounds like you need to find someone that has an understanding towards your traits and someone that will take time and patience to get to know you instead of just labelling you. You sound like a great girl so I don't think you should let anyone get you down. :)



tronist
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27 Mar 2012, 4:53 am

yea, letting guys who are 'taken' see you naked is a gross miss-allocation of your time. if you want to meet a guy, get out there! find places to meet guys. do some research on these places. do you have any hobbies? there is probably a club or group for your hobby that you could meet people with like-interests. its important to try to 'look the part'. this means you cant leave the house expecting results unless you have focused on your hygiene first. take a shower, brush your teeth, use deodorant, and wear a nice dress or outfit or something. if you try to look good you will have 100x more luck with guys than if you wear sweatpants, no makeup, etc. being sociable can be difficult, but all you really gotta do is try to talk to people. some will reject you, but dont worry about them! it just means they werent right for you, yanno?



Ldub20Owl316
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27 Mar 2012, 6:17 am

I'd like to get to know you thehipsternerdette because we may have a lot in common. I am also looking for a partner and find it frustrating that I can't find one.



thehipsternerdette
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02 Apr 2012, 12:53 pm

Thank you very much for your responses everyone. My friend and I have talked about our conversations and he didn't mean to make me uncomfortable. We have talked it out, apologised to each other and made amends. We are both very shy people and not talkative.



madbutnotmad
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26 Nov 2016, 2:00 pm

hey, sounds like the guy who gets off on seeing you naked is a dark b-stard who's taking advantage of you and taking the piss. Perhaps i am wrong, but if he has a girl friend and your not cheating with him behind his g-friends back then he shouldn't be asking to see you naked...

however if you are going naked to see if he gets off on seeing you naked
that's different and perhaps you are the one that's being naughty?

still, your main problem at hand is finding someone for yourself.
Perhaps you need to research dating skills, dating sites and looking for men in shared interest.
Especially if you are looking for someone long term rather than just sex.
If you are looking for sex, i am sure you will be able to find that fairly easy.