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Nick88
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24 Apr 2012, 10:23 am

Its official as of today i am the biggest waste of space ever , therefore i should rot in the corner. Life has given me no purpose , nor has it given me any sunshine or flowers it has just given me a grenade that i can use to blow myself up with.

Time and space are completely irrelevant and so am i , i am invisible to everyone and everything , i even go out of the way to completely forget myself. I have nothing to do and do not know what to do with myself in general and i am a complete disaster.

Anyone thinks anything different about this , please tell me , but as far as i am concerned i have lost the will power and purpose and decency to do right by myself. Also i have lost the enthusiasm to look after myself and the enthusiasm to do what is best for myself.



Bun
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24 Apr 2012, 10:26 am

I wonder what it has to do with this subforum, were you diagnosed with anything?


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Ann2011
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24 Apr 2012, 10:59 am

It sounds like you may be depressed. Have you sought counselling? You are not a "waste of space."



SpiritBlooms
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24 Apr 2012, 1:26 pm

You're not a waste of space, and there's no official with the authority to declare you one.



theWanderer
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24 Apr 2012, 3:09 pm

Actually, there were officials who, more or less, declared individuals "wastes of space". They worked in Nazi Germany - and their official declarations were some of the vilest human pronouncements ever made. If anyone claims to have officially told you that you are a waste of space, all they've proved is their own utter lack of decency.


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Alfonso12345
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24 Apr 2012, 11:40 pm

I have thought those same things about myself and still do quite often. It seems I'm not very useful most of the time and quite often, I don't feel like I belong anywhere. I really don't have a lot of skills in anything and there is really only one career I could ever consider having because I don't think I could do anything else and if I can't get that then... I don't know what I will do.

Sorry I'm not very helpful. I just understand what you are experiencing. Normally when I begin to think thoughts like this, I try to get my focus on something else, but that only works for a short time before I am back to thinking about how useless I am.



Rainy
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25 Apr 2012, 9:55 am

Go see a psychologist?



SpiritBlooms
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25 Apr 2012, 1:18 pm

I think it's a mistake to examine too severely what use one is to society or the world. It's impossible to be totally fair in that.

There are people who are vastly rewarded in our world for basically being show-offs or thieves. Our society is a bit muddled in the appreciation/rewards department. If you aren't harming others, taking advantage of others for your own gain, stealing, inciting hatred or violence, or anything of that sort, you're not a bad person.

If you spend a lot of time simply doing your own harmless thing and minding your own business, following the values you hold dear, doing what you can, with your abilities, to contribute to the whole, even if that's very limited, you're a good person.

That's how I see it, and most people I encounter are the latter kind, and valuable to me just because they're here, being themselves, not hurting anyone. Someone who wants to do no harm is a lovable person.

So let's all give ourselves a break, mkay? Show up, do your best, and stop expecting yourself to be perfect. No one is! You're wonderful as you are.



Alfonso12345
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25 Apr 2012, 3:18 pm

SpiritBlooms wrote:
There are people who are vastly rewarded in our world for basically being show-offs or thieves. Our society is a bit muddled in the appreciation/rewards department. If you aren't harming others, taking advantage of others for your own gain, stealing, inciting hatred or violence, or anything of that sort, you're not a bad person.

If you spend a lot of time simply doing your own harmless thing and minding your own business, following the values you hold dear, doing what you can, with your abilities, to contribute to the whole, even if that's very limited, you're a good person.

That's how I see it, and most people I encounter are the latter kind, and valuable to me just because they're here, being themselves, not hurting anyone. Someone who wants to do no harm is a lovable person.


This is very helpful to me and hopefully it is also helpful for Nick88. I hope things get better for you Nick88.



Last edited by Alfonso12345 on 25 Apr 2012, 9:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Bun
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25 Apr 2012, 3:23 pm

I think a lot of the repliers here have offered conclusive replies, while we still don't know what this guy's trouble is. Let him reply before answering the original post again?


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Nick88
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30 Apr 2012, 3:50 pm

Yeah i have counselling at the moment one day a week on a Wednesday which i find useful because it gives me a chance to chat about someone.

I have already gone to a place called the Maudsley in London to see a Psychologist and have a coures of CBT , but i am going back soon to see my psychologist again as it has been recomended that i need further input. I agreed with this and hope i will get more help on fighting my problems.

I have semantic pragmatic disorder which translates into mild autism , but have been in denial since i was told i have autism and felt really guilty about it.

A lot of the main trouble at the moment comes from huge self doubt and low self esteem , also i have negative assumptions and beliefs of myself. Negative thought patterns are difficult to budge and i continue to fall into traps of negative thinking.

I often feel very apologetic when around other people and my family and often guilty about being me. I am very uneasy socially because i feel that people will not except me and also very isolated. The isolation is part of me thinking that i will never break into other groups of people , i hate offending or upsetting people by getting in there way and feel guilty for doing so.

I can never say what is on my mind to family or friends and try to be perfect when around everyone. I also try to show no flaws and show that i have no weaknesses so that i feel that people will like me more.



namaste
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01 May 2012, 6:42 am

I often feel just like you feel, simply because i was always told by my parents that i am useless and good for nothing

I had a hard time removing those thoughts from my head and telling myself that I am good enough.

Remember darkness cannot remove darkness, only light can remove it
similarly hatred cannot remove hatred only love can remove it

Now i dont wait for others to love me i take care of my family, love them, cook for them
i try to help underprivileged and anyone i can.

there are bad people out there, world is a cruel place,
there is pain and suffering
Jesus was crucified, Lord Rama was attacked by Evil Demons and so was every other good person

But none of those evil people are worshipped today....people worship Jesus and Lord Rama because
they believed and followed the path of righteousness


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