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LKL
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18 Aug 2012, 7:02 pm

I've been told more than once that I'm "intimidating," I guess because I speak my mind, have a black belt in aikido, and am into science. Perhaps as a consquence of this, every man who's ever been seriously attracted to me has been either in the military, ex-military, or a military brat; I guess they know that their masculinity can't be threatened? My current bf is a very smart, very attractive ex-marine who's at the local university studying geology on the GI bill.

Maybe you just needed to find someone who wouldn't be threatened by someone who doesn't pull the tricks NT women occasionally do of making themselves out to be dumber, weaker, less opinionated, or generally more helpless than they actually are.



aspiekelly
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09 Sep 2012, 4:53 am

Something's wrong with my boyfriend, he wanted to "talk" when he gets off work and he's upset because we were hanging out with his friend last night, and he said that I can't keep anything private that happens between us. :(



LKL
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09 Sep 2012, 4:49 pm

I tend to default to not telling anyone anything, but I've heard that some aspies have a problem with telling everyone everything. You might ask him, flat out, to give you a list of things that you shouldn't talk to other people about and default to not saying anything if you're unsure. Let him know that don't mean to embarass him, and that you just don't see anything shameful that needs to be hidden between you and him, but that you can work on it for him because it makes him unhappy. It will take work on your part; for a while, you'll have to stop and think about what you're saying before you talk to people about your relationship.



lostgirl1986
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09 Sep 2012, 5:25 pm

I think my lack of emotion and hard time socializing scares off guys. I think I'm doomed to be a crazy cat lady for the rest of my life, I'm trying to come to terms with that though and just be happy with my independence.



Last edited by lostgirl1986 on 09 Sep 2012, 9:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.

LKL
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09 Sep 2012, 6:36 pm

lostgirl1986 wrote:
I think my lack of emotion and hard time socializing scares off guys. I think I'm doomed to be a crazy cat lady for the rest of my life, I trying to come to terms with that though and just be happy with my independence.

being a crazy cat lady is underrated :)



Fnord
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09 Sep 2012, 7:19 pm

Things that scared me off after one date:

1. Clinginess. She wouldn't let go, and even waited for me right outside the men's room.
2. Desperation & Insecurity. "You do like me, don't you?" & "Please call me, please?" even before the end of the date.
3. Aggression. She acted more macho than most men I know, and could swear for five minutes without repeating herself.
4. Racism & Sexism. Wouldn't go anywhere that "Darkies" might go. Assumed that being a man made me both dishonest and horny.
5. Hygiene (lack thereof). Well, at least she had a nice personality ...
6. Paranoia & Suspicion. I smiled at a waitress, and she went ballistic. Then she wanted to know who else I'd been 'screwing'.
7. Judgmentalism. Didn't like my car, my clothes, the way I talked, my manners ... and then wondered why I seemed unhappy.
8. Exploitation. Suddenly, six of her BFFs showed up at our table and tried to add their drinks to my bill.
9. Dishonesty. She said she was 18. Another said she wasn't married. A third said she wanted to go out with me again...
10. Shyness. Every attempt to converse with her was met with a nod, a grunt, or a shrug. At least she smiled.


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namaste
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09 Sep 2012, 11:23 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
Most guys are scared of any women who doesn't want to be their sex slave, cook, and maid. End of story.

Agreed there is no doubt about that.
Nowadays they dont even want to get emotionally entangled with a woman
They just to do the thing and move on.
In normal husband wife relationship there is no talking, no understanding and no love left


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AspieOtaku
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10 Sep 2012, 8:29 pm

I wouldn't mind a clingy and emotionally attached woman I know this may sound weird coming from a guy,but I myself tend to get clingy and emotionally attached easily I get overly affectionate and always want to give comfort while also seeking comfort. :oops: :oops: :oops: :roll: :oops:


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