scaring off men

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I always seem to scare men off or we only go on one date.
I've been meeting them on dating websites and sometimes they pretend they are looking for a girlfriend and then they are really just looking for sex. I am pretty much a magnet for liars, cheaters, etc.

Anyway, I finally found someone I really like and he even Googled Asperger's and everything. He might even be the one, I hope so. I don't want to scare him off, but I know I have a problem talking about babies and marriage, we've both been saying "I love you" which is great and exciting. My parents love him.

I am just wondering if anyone else scares guys off and what they do to scare them.

probably scared of the aspiness

Most guys are scared of any women who doesn't want to be their sex slave, cook, and maid. End of story.

This.

I don't know about scaring off, but I think there were times that I didn't give off the right "signals" or pick up on the ones they were giving me, simply because, like most Aspies, I'm illiterate when it comes to nonverbal communication. My first boyfriend ever, who eventually became my husband, was very direct. He asked for my phone number the night we met, called me the next day, told me he was interested in me, and asked me to go out with him. He found my quirkiness and the fact that I'm different from NT women endearing and attractive. Men like him are out there, but I got lucky to find one at 18.

I'm not usually able to scare guys off, even when I try. I turned a couple of men into my superiors for inappropriate behaviour when I was still working. They came back just as strong only a few days later. However, when it is someone I am trying to impress, I tend to confuse them with the way I talk and my sense of humor, so they wind up not looking at me seriously.

If you scare men off after just one date (assuming it's after you've spoken on dating sites), is your picture acurate? Everytime I've rejected someone after one date, it was because their pictures were highly deceptive.

Im not .

My counselor once said that men might find me intimidating. I asked how was I to rectify that when I didn't know what I was doing to intimidate them? Anyway, I think that this was what might have scared men off in the past. It took me a long, long time to find my current partner because he is not intimidated by me.

*takes notes*

In favor of babies and marriage or no? Because this might be it right here if you're in favor of it. For one, the plus is that you're scaring off potential commitment-phobes (not all, but some, the remaining guys just bury it and will potentially cheat/lie behind your back). But the minus is that you might be frightening off someone who might think that you're coming on too strong and that you might try to convince him to rush into a marriage and parenthood whether or not he's truly compatible with you and might want to take things slower just to make sure he knows what he wants out of a relationship. I hope this makes sense?

You shouldn't talk about plans you already have for the future. Men don't really want to hear it. We like to go with, when it happens.

Then there is disappointment, what happens if you don't get what you want by the time you said? It feels like lot of pressure. This isn't good for anyone.

You should talk about the things that matter at that point and not too far into the future. Plans for a holiday are good.

Makes me think of one of my famous quotes : "If a guy wants a maid, he should hire a maid. That would make things clear."

But otherwise, I have absolutely no advice to give : I seem to be the champion of failed relationships. While men, at least some, find me attractive, at one point or another, they usually decide that I'm not what they thought I was...

Try to enjoy the moment without over thinking it?

I've scared a few, but mostly due to a combination of obliviousness and being overly blunt on occasion. To this day, the people I get on with the best are blunt, outspoken, and will tell you exactly what's on their mind.
For casual dating, just focus on getting to know a person and having fun together. Otherwise, the feel is more job application than romance.

I think I scare guys off by moving things too quickly. This is basically what happens, at first I have a shell and the guys try to break it by promising me the world and blah blah blah and then we end up having sex which makes me feel closer to the guy. Then after that the wheel turns and it's me who is all into the guy and the guy is more distant. I'm dating someone right now and we mutually tried to hold off on the sex but nope, we gave in to temptation and the same thing is happening to me right now.

The key for me is I need to start playing harder to get and let the guy pursue me no matter what temptations get in the way. It's true, sex does change everything.

Yeah I used to scare off guys pretty quickly with my clingyness. So I havent really dated in 2 years. I figured at some pt, there was no pt in trying to date if I keep scaring them off. So I decided to not try dating for a long time. Besides, the guys around here dont interest me.