Falling in love?

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i read that most people with AS have stronger feelings and more sensitive feelings (which i do too) and i was wondering - if people with AS have more intense feelings, does this mean they fall in love faster than a typical NT?

I know I do. Everything I do gets obsessive very quickly. I "fell in love" with my ex wife very fast... we got married in no time it seemed. I was recently dating a girl long distance and she just broke up with me because "things were moving too fast" after 4 months of dating. I get excited and can not censor myself even if I know people wouldn't be receptive to what I am saying. I'd say there's truth to your idea, yes.

I did and the other person did not feel the same and now they are not even a friend so I know it sneaked up on me but it was a real feeling towards another person. More to it but oh well.

Too much or not enough, I say....

On the opposite side of the coin, I dated a girl exclusively for 14 months and (like an idiot) waited until after she started seeing someone else to tell her I loved her. What a waste of time that was!

Up until recently I'd have said I don't really fall in love as intensely as other people

...but then I met a certain someone. Since then I have to stop myself from literally smothering him with affection 24/7.

I could probably type on and on about this... After reading tons of articles about Asperger's, I saw so much of myself in the love aspect of it.

For example, when I set my mind to a girl, I tend to get obsessive. I fell in love with who I thought was the girl of my dreams and asked her out 4 times over 2 years because of how I felt for her.

But I see in other aspies exactly what I see in myself in relationships. Most of the time, I'm clueless of what to do or where to start. Mostly, it's that I feel such unconditional love for whoever I happen to be going for at that time. A good way to explain it is to say that an NT's relationship is very dynamic, ready to change if it needs to, like a liquid. Whereas, someone with AS will try to have a relationship that's solid, or set in stone. It doesn't change, at least not on their end. If it's an NT/AS relationship, that makes it tough, especially for the aspie. They normally don't want anything to change, even if it needs to... AS and NT relationships can work, but it's hard.

Anyway, back to the topic... I also feel that I can't censor myself. I tell whoever I'm in love with exactly how I feel, and I can't hold back.

I fall fast and I fall hard.

On that note, anyone else have moves put on them by someone they already liked? MAN, what a rush!!

I guess I don't really know about other people, but for me, I fall in love with people way too quickly and then I end up obsessing over them for a long time. After the many rejections I have gotten from these people and the one dating relationship I had that failed, it seems the best option for me is to just avoid emotional attachment. If I feel myself begin to fall in love with someone, then I know I better find a way to forget about that person as quickly as possible.

I honestly don't fall in love easily. If I find myself starting to have feeling for someone, I can usually fight it off before it gets to late. I am very wary about falling in love, so I don't let myself fall for someone quickly because I know I'll end up hurting myself. I've had a few crushes, but most of the time it takes several months for me to have stronger feelings for the person. Honestly, I can never say I've been in love, but I've had strong feeling for another persona before.

Why is it called that, is it because someone at somepoint tripped over something and fell in love with someone?. Seems very odd falling in love.

I fall for dinner.

Fall in love fast and hard.

And get squashed fast and hard.

i end up making fool out of myself in love
i get obsessive about love and lose myself

I think the reason for that is because there is this idea that some guys who all of the sudden love someone, but haven't told them yet, they end up looking at them while walking by and don't pay attention to where they are going so they sometimes walk into stuff, or maybe they trip over things they don't see and fall. So it would literally be falling in love then because they would be falling while in love. I think women might do this sometimes too, but I really don't know if they do that or not.

But the phrase does sound a bit weird though. Maybe it originates from some strange myth involving Cupid spilling his love potion that he puts all over his arrows into a lake or something and then when a bunch of people fall in it, they begin making love to the first person they see. I really don't know. It's time... to go to Google for this!

The responses so far are not at all what I'd expect. Just shows how much I still have to learn about AS, I suppose. But also how do people define "in love"? The intensity of your feelings for someone is a range, not a binary switch (out of love/in love), so how do you know you're past the "in love" threshold?

What? I thought it would be the other way around! It's always the same with this forum - one minute Aspies are the ones doing one thing, the next minute NTs are the ones who do that. When I talk to most NTs, they claim that they love someone from the internet who they've never even met, or if they have just met someone just for a day they seem to think they're head-over-hills in love. With me, it takes time, I need to know a man properly before I can actually fall in love. I may develop crushes on men and think I love them and want to be with them, but first I do want to get to know them so I can build up more secure feelings.