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ELLCIM
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09 Dec 2006, 10:46 pm

I've been working in the same cafe for over a year and a half. During the summer of 2005 and into 2006 I had a customer now and again who would be sitting in the cafe with a girlfriend or two of hers and then she would flirt with me in various ways. I don't remember details from over a year ago but I remember one instance where she was accusing me of stealing some purple lawn ornament or something like that and that a police officer was looking for me, and she kept adding onto the story and it was really weird.

Now she's working for us, although in another department. When she saw me tonight she said hello to me using my name, and then started a spiel about me being her best friend, although she was looking somewhat to the side. I told her I had to get back to work, so later when she was leaving I quietly said to her "I know you like me", citing how she acted around me as a customer. She said that she and her friend just like joking with me, then she said in a more frank voice "What's it to you?" I just said "Whataya mean?" I then walked away.

Now, she's four years younger than me (I'm 20, she's 16), and she is pretty hot (albeit a little s*utty). And I know she's been testing me. But what do I say?



Gamester
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09 Dec 2006, 11:20 pm

stay the heck away.

rape statuatory laws. and she's 16. and you're 20.



lowfreq50
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09 Dec 2006, 11:31 pm

Depends on where you live....

<img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/ef/Age_of_Consent.png"/>

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/c ... onsent.png



Gamester
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09 Dec 2006, 11:33 pm

well after realizing that Ellcim lives in Canada, I'm still saying that he shouldn't go after the girl.

she's obviously toying with your heart.



Aspie1
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10 Dec 2006, 12:04 pm

Stay away.

She's 16 and you're 20. You don't want to be charged with statuatory rape. Watch the movie "Jailbait" if you're still considering seeing her. There are countries that have 16 as the age of consent, but US and Canada aren't among them.

Also, from the way you described the situation, it doesn't seem that she likes you. Maybe she was just playing a harmless (from her point of view) joke, with no intention to hurt you outright. Or maybe she was intending to hurt you by pretending to like you. In either case, sorry to break it to you, but it doesn't look promising.



ELLCIM
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10 Dec 2006, 1:31 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
Stay away.

She's 16 and you're 20. You don't want to be charged with statuatory rape. Watch the movie "Jailbait" if you're still considering seeing her. There are countries that have 16 as the age of consent, but US and Canada aren't among them.

Also, from the way you described the situation, it doesn't seem that she likes you. Maybe she was just playing a harmless (from her point of view) joke, with no intention to hurt you outright. Or maybe she was intending to hurt you by pretending to like you. In either case, sorry to break it to you, but it doesn't look promising.


I'm not particularly interested in her anyways; I just wanted to know what she's trying to do. The age of consent in Canada is 14, so it would be perfectly legal if this were to be a romantic situation. The current federal government introduced a bill in parliament in June 2006 that would raise the age of consent to 16, and continue to permit sexual relations between a 14 or 15 year old who is no more than five years older (e.g. a 14-year-old girl could legally have sex with a 19-year-old guy). There have been cases where American pedophiles go to Canada to commit their acts because they can get away with it there.

Trust me, Canada has a highly relaxed view of what is permissible sexual activity compared to most countries, ever since former Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau said in the 1970s that "the state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation." Penalties for pedophilia, for example, are very small. Canada is a haven of sexual freedom like no other country where pedophiles flock to and prosper and access to abortion is even less restricted than the United States. Even the proposed bill to raise the age of consent is too limited in scope to be effective against pedophilia. It's not easy for a minority Conservative government to do what they need to do in the face of Trudeau bleeding heart liberals and bleeding heart NDPers in the opposition who continue to believe in complete sexual freedom at all costs.

In the United States, age of consent depends on the state. Age of consent is 16 in the UK.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/crime ... t-faq.html



ELLCIM
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17 Dec 2006, 10:46 am

I'm told by a male co-worker that another girl in the store (not the same one I originally wrote about) likes me. He reports that she told him that she likes me, and in this case I am not surprised. She's always very friendly around me and is often flirtatous, and last time I saw her she told me that I make her blush. She's been flirtatous for awhile but the recent revelation that I make her blush, plus what she's been telling co-workers has come since I stopped being a wussy doormat and started responding to her like someone who isn't concerned about what others think.

Now, this girl is also 16, although a lot more mature than the other one. She'll be 17 and I'll be 21 soon enough. My theory is that as long as the girl's age is over 80% of my age, there's no problem. So when I'm 30 the cutoff point will be 24.

I've known much worse scenarios. One girl I know was going out with a 20-year-old when she was 13. And they were still going out when she was 19 and he was 26.



Veresae
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17 Dec 2006, 12:56 pm

This is very interesting--Silenze posted a similar thread, from the other point of view. ("Can't figure out my next option.") And this one, at present, is right above it. You're 20 and the girl you're grappling about is 16. In Silenze's thread, he is 15 and the girl he's grappling about is 20! Sorry, I just found all this interesting...heh.



Stinkypuppy
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17 Dec 2006, 4:13 pm

Yeah, that girl who is mentioned in the original post just seems like an immature, attention-seeking ho. She also seems to have a stupid attitude ("What's it to you?") to boot, so I'd just ignore her.


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Gamester
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17 Dec 2006, 11:09 pm

what else is new with females this day?



AnonymousAnonymous
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24 Dec 2006, 2:11 pm

To ELLCIM:
Like what Gamester said, stay the hell away from her. She might know you have AS just from watching you & uses her promiscuity against you. If she continues to do so outside of your workplace, try filing a restraining order against her so that you may stay away from her! At your workplace, tell your boss what has been going on & ask that your shift be different or look for another job at another cafe.

This girl totally sounds like a stalker.



ELLCIM
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27 Dec 2006, 7:23 pm

AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
To ELLCIM:
Like what Gamester said, stay the hell away from her. She might know you have AS just from watching you & uses her promiscuity against you. If she continues to do so outside of your workplace, try filing a restraining order against her so that you may stay away from her! At your workplace, tell your boss what has been going on & ask that your shift be different or look for another job at another cafe.

This girl totally sounds like a stalker.


Nothing from her since then. I'm not concerned.



Gamester
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27 Dec 2006, 7:44 pm

hmmmmm.......and when was the last time this supposed flirtation occured?



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27 Dec 2006, 8:04 pm

Seems to me that you are playing the situation rather well...

"..since I stopped being a wussy doormat and started responding to her like someone who isn't concerned about what others think."
This is totally the correct attitude.

As long as you are aware of the law, then apply your 80% rule ( in my opinion 16yo is generally old enough - well for you anyway :D).
( Being listed as a sex-offender, not to mention the way you would be treated 'inside', would clearly change this).

Anyway, my main point is.. ignore these people who are advising you to stay away.
Restraining orders? (I tend to take things literally, but this must be a joke, right?)
Yes, she maybe dumb, she maybe a teaser, she maybe attention seeking. But you need to get some fun out of life, and you seem to have the right attitude. My advice is to keep doing what you already are doing.



AnonymousAnonymous
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27 Dec 2006, 10:38 pm

Kosmonaut wrote:
Seems to me that you are playing the situation rather well...

Restraining orders? (I tend to take things literally, but this must be a joke, right?)
Yes, she maybe dumb, she maybe a teaser, she maybe attention seeking. But you need to get some fun out of life, and you seem to have the right attitude. My advice is to keep doing what you already are doing.


That's correct my friend. Since he has had no more run-ins with the NT girl, I would also say to him: Ignore Her!

I applaud him for his way of handling the situation.



Gamester
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27 Dec 2006, 10:38 pm

yeah.

restraining orders are one way to get people mad at you.