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SteelMaiden
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21 Jan 2013, 4:24 pm

When I was diagnosed with Asperger's at 16 years of age, the report said "moderate" in terms of severity of my AS. Now my psychiatrist says my Asperger's is "severe". At school I had two friends and I managed. Now I am in university, I have no friends at uni, I don't even know anyone's name as I have developed selective mutism and cannot communicate with the other students. I have a full-time support worker with me at university who is the only reason I am able to actually attend uni at all. When I was a teenager, I went out for walks with my friends, and I used to go to their houses. Now I only leave my bedroom in supported housing for university and appointments. I don't see friends at all (and can I even call them friends if I haven't seen them for 2 years....), except for one person I met on WP. Also my sensory issues are severe, worse than they were when I was a teenager (I now have huge trouble walking next to a road without earplugs).

I have heard many people say that autism can improve whilst you grow older.....well my autism has gone from moderate to disabling and severe. Even a half an hour encounter with another human involving conversation leaves me confused and drained.

Is it possible for autism to get worse as one grows older?


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21 Jan 2013, 4:31 pm

Mine was worst aged 16-24. But, that may have been from all the bullying before age 16. At 35, it is much better now. G



CyborgUprising
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21 Jan 2013, 6:29 pm

Periodically, I'll notice certain symptoms becoming more pronounced, though this is usually restricted to sensory issues and stimming.



Samian
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21 Jan 2013, 6:52 pm

I wonder if the OP is under more stress now? I think stress makes it harder for me to function socially and at work....



SteelMaiden
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22 Jan 2013, 3:00 am

Samian wrote:
I wonder if the OP is under more stress now? I think stress makes it harder for me to function socially and at work....


The stress of nearly having a psychotic relapse recently.


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22 Jan 2013, 3:15 am

Stress can play a huge role in severity and other factors can play a role in "getting worse". you can unlearn coping strategies you once had, for example. I am much less capable of pretending to be normal than when i was 16. But i was also basically isolated for 7 years and stopped interacting with people regularly. Its not so much that i am any worse off as it is i just stopped practicing "fitting in" and forgot how. Conversation used to be alright for me. Nowadays, i can barely make eye contact or nod slightly and mutter a 'hi' to people that greet me.

So in short, yes it can become more debilitating as time goes on. It goes both ways.


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SteelMaiden
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22 Jan 2013, 4:30 am

That's true. When I was 15, I could socialise with people I knew, and although I was "odd", they enjoyed my company. Now I am struggling to let my Aspie friend come over to my house; if he did come, we would just sit in silence with him messing around on my laptop and me reading in my bed.


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Verdandi
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22 Jan 2013, 4:32 am

This article may be helpful to you:

http://archive.autistics.org/library/more-autistic.html

As far as it goes, I know that I have been losing ground for years. My mother has noticed many more specifics and included them in her letter to SSA for my SSI application. I have periods where it accelerates from burnout, period of recovery (rarely back to where I was before the burnouts), followed by another burnout. My last burnout was a few years ago, when I first really thought that I might be autistic.



SteelMaiden
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22 Jan 2013, 4:52 am

Verdandi wrote:
This article may be helpful to you:

http://archive.autistics.org/library/more-autistic.html

As far as it goes, I know that I have been losing ground for years. My mother has noticed many more specifics and included them in her letter to SSA for my SSI application. I have periods where it accelerates from burnout, period of recovery (rarely back to where I was before the burnouts), followed by another burnout. My last burnout was a few years ago, when I first really thought that I might be autistic.


Thanks for the link.

I've been having weekly shutdowns because of living in supported housing = living with NTs = small talk + enforced socialising.

Now I cannot cope with that anymore and I'm just going to isolate myself as much as possible to protect myself. As severe stress triggers my psychosis.


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Verdandi
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22 Jan 2013, 4:57 am

SteelMaiden wrote:

Thanks for the link.

I've been having weekly shutdowns because of living in supported housing = living with NTs = small talk + enforced socialising.

Now I cannot cope with that anymore and I'm just going to isolate myself as much as possible to protect myself. As severe stress triggers my psychosis.


I do not get why NTs think that it helps to force autistic people to socialize.

I have frequent shutdowns due to living with a house full of people as well. It's not remotely fun.

I hope you can find an equilibrium that will minimize shutdowns and not trigger your psychosis.



TheValk
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22 Jan 2013, 5:21 am

I've read a book about an autistic person becoming non-verbal during adolescence for no apparent reason. So things can go quite bad.



Verdandi
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22 Jan 2013, 5:25 am

TheValk wrote:
I've read a book about an autistic person becoming non-verbal during adolescence for no apparent reason. So things can go quite bad.


Becoming non-verbal permanently? That sounds a bit like autistic catatonia.

Going nonverbal temporarily seems fairly common. I seem to do at least once a week.



Verdandi
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22 Jan 2013, 5:34 am

Some information on autistic catatonia:

http://bjp.rcpsych.org/content/176/4/357.long

And a thread about it:

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt211951.html



SteelMaiden
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22 Jan 2013, 5:37 am

Thanks.

I don't understand the whole NTs thinking enforced socialising helps thing either. Good thing that my occupational therapist knows that it helps me to isolate myself, and she never forced me into group therapy like some past idiots did.

I go non-verbal for several hours at a time on a weekly basis. I find that sleeping helps to "reset" myself.

Is not gesticulating at all / showing absolutely no facial expression, and talking only when necessary / using very brief answers, a form of autistic catatonia?

I just got to university just now and already I'm feeling totally overloaded. I really hope this does not push me into deep psychosis again. The voices and Spies have been worse lately....


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Verdandi
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22 Jan 2013, 5:42 am

I don't know nearly enough to say about autistic catatonia.

I do know I do the not gesticulating, showing no facial expression, talking only when necessary, and using brief answers thing, but I do not think I have autistic catatonia. I am not positive I do not, but if I do it is not that severe compared to others I've heard about.

As far as nonverbal goes, what often helps me is:

* Sleeping
* Cats
* Time

Sleeping isn't reliable. Cats are more reliable, but not perfect, and time is the most reliable. The longest I've gone without speaking is a full week, but I think that wasn't so much a single shutdown but multiple shutdowns over several days.



Raziel
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22 Jan 2013, 7:08 am

Verdandi wrote:
I do know I do the not gesticulating, showing no facial expression, talking only when necessary, and using brief answers thing, but I do not think I have autistic catatonia. I am not positive I do not, but if I do it is not that severe compared to others I've heard about.


I have the mutism thing during stress.
I once was in a panic situation and was so frightened that I couldn't move or talk for hours, but I was toled that's called differently, I forgot.
It was really frightening. :cry:

Also my autism got worse since 2003 I would say.
Too much stress and then my mood problems.


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