Why can't we answer questions?
I assume because we are logical thinkers of sorts. But scientifically is there anything on logical and answering questions and autism/Asperger's?
Some life examples:
Dad: Did you study today?
(Expected answer Yes/No)
Me: I was just in my room reading my textbook before dinner.
Dad: Are you going to get in the pool?
(expect Yes/No)
Me: Well I have to do laundry/clean house and finish chores then I might get in the pool.
I understand Aspies can relate I've made a topic similar to this ages ago but is there any scientific data to back this up and is it just "we think Logically?"
Is it called something? I always tend to give an answer never Yes/No IMO yes/no is to basic!
Thanks!! !
I know exactly what your talking about. I feel like you really can't answer any question with a straight up yes or no answer. There's always a gray area at varying degrees. I find the variation can be on multiple levels too. I think that's a gift that us aspies have.
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James Hackett
aspie quiz results; http://www.rdos.net/eng/poly12c.php?p1= ... =80&p12=28
I know exactly what your talking about. I feel like you really can't answer any question with a straight up yes or no answer. There's always a gray area at varying degrees. I find the variation can be on multiple levels too. I think this gift is what causes us to struggle sometimes such as understanding people, social interaction, and reading social cues....we can see multiple meaning instead of just one like an NT would see and these multiple meanings can sometimes confuse us.
_________________
James Hackett
aspie quiz results; http://www.rdos.net/eng/poly12c.php?p1= ... =80&p12=28
That makes since. IMO "Yes/No" are too basic. I am learning research methods and the idea of yes/no is odd to me. I always explain so I don't have too. Because if I said "Yes" (to getting in the pool) then I'll go back to chores and then be asked "I thought you were getting in the pool?" THEN I'd have to explain Yes but I have to finish chores first. Personally I like giving logical answers that are drawn out vs. yes/no basic stuff.
conundrum
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This.
For the sake of accuracy, I have to give details beyond yes/no in most cases. Some people have called it "overexplaining", but then, if I try to just answer yes or no to a similar question later, it ends up not being enough ("Why didn't you tell me such-and-such also?").
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The existence of the leader who is wise
is barely known to those he leads.
He acts without unnecessary speech,
so that the people say,
'It happened of its own accord.' -Tao Te Ching, Verse 17
I think it comes down to not being able to decipher the desires of the questioner. We Aspies generally are not very good at determining what the other person wants, in this case what answer they are looking for, and such we respond in the way we would want someone to answer a question of ours. I hate answers which leave more questions, I want you to be as clear as possible, and so I just assume that is what the other person wants as well.
Looking back I can often see that my answer was probably more detailed than the person was looking for, but in the moment however, I respond before I am able to process the context of the situation.
I'm pretty much the other way around. My world is pretty much black/white, right/wrong, good/bad etc. I have a tendency to overlook grey areas so I don't answer with "grey answers" either. At least not most of the time and if I don't know the answer I won't give an answer. I'll just say "I don't know".
goldfish21
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Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
Another possible explanation is the aspie trait that internal thoughts are sometimes verbalized, so you're thinking about the other things you've got to get done before you consider getting in the pool and still formulating your answer while your mouth is giving a live play by play of your thought processes.
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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
Or if not meanings, then at least situations, which makes it so hard to answer most polls and quizzes. Like that terrible Myers Briggs test, where there is nothing but yes or no, when the true answer depends entirely on the situation.
In most real life situations you tend to know a bit more what they're asking., which makes it more concrete.
(Expected answer Yes/No)
Me: I was just in my room reading my textbook before dinner.
Dad: Are you going to get in the pool?
(expect Yes/No)
Me: Well I have to do laundry/clean house and finish chores then I might get in the pool.
I would've just answered the first one with a yes (Unless I'd been slacking off most of the day instead and tried to make it sound as though I'd been studying longer than I had).
For the second part, I'd likely have said 'yes' or 'yeah, once the laundry's done.'
My father often says I'm too hung up on the minor details. I think people are too little preoccupied with details. Details are very important. One minor detail can change it all.
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BOLTZ 17/3 2012 - 12/11 2020
Beautiful, sweet, gentle, playful, loyal
simply the best and one of a kind
love you and miss you, dear boy
Stop the wolf kills! https://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeact ... 3091429765
My mom will often ask a to me unanswerable question.
"If I take codeine now can you promise me I won't feel a side effect 30 years down the road" I come back with unanswerable as asked, however the drug itself has a fairly good safety profile and has been used for close to a century.
What THEY really wanted to hear was:
"Shut up you'll be fine take your cough medicine"
^Oh, I hate questions like that! I think I would’ve been a little annoyed really. Say 1 in 10000 gets side effects. “I have no way of knowing which group you’ll be in.”
Also when people tell you they’re gonna do something they’re not looking forward to, like getting a root canal. I always tell it like it is. “Yikes, that’s gonna be expensive and uncomfortable.”
I had one myself and I found the procedure very uncomfortable, and felt suffocated with the mask they use on and the dust cloud from removing the remains and I didn’t wanna breathe that in. So I tell them how it was for me. When I’m anxious about something, I want a realistic view of how it’s gonna be, the last thing I want is someone to lie to me “no, it won’t hurt”, “no, it won’t be uncomfortable” when it will be. Let me know so I’m prepared. Otherwise I can never trust them again. Was I appreciated? Nope. “ ‘That’s gonna be expensive and uncomfortable’??! Thanks! Some friend you are!”
I mentioned it to my mother and she exclaimed “You never learnt to lie about such things.”
Why on earth would anyone wish to be badly prepared?
Same as this colleague my mother had. She was having a brain scan and my mother tried to reassure her and said they probably wouldn’t find anything wrong. I’d never say such a thing because I have no way of knowing. I would’ve said “I hope they don’t find anything wrong.”
_________________
BOLTZ 17/3 2012 - 12/11 2020
Beautiful, sweet, gentle, playful, loyal
simply the best and one of a kind
love you and miss you, dear boy
Stop the wolf kills! https://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeact ... 3091429765
Yup, they are asking what amounts to a rhetorical question looking for support not an answer. Once I realized this and looked for it things went a lot smoother, still miss some less obvious ones though.
But I hate it when you're asking an honest question, and someone else assumes you want a hug lol. No I really wanted to know the answer!
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