Your thoughts on growing out of Aspergers

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littlebee
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21 Mar 2013, 2:02 pm

nessa238 wrote:

Having a brain that functions in a different/slower way than the average person has caused me to develop psychological problems as a result of people rejecting and being intolerant towards me. So there is a combination of the non-standard design and action of my brain plus the knock-on psychological effect of how you get treated when your brain isn't behaving in the standard way

Even if you were to cure me of all the psychological problems though the basic difference/defectiveness of my brain would still remain and still be causing me problems with other people who were expecting me to act in a more normal way

I'm convinced that a lot of the time I'm having this type of conversation with people whose brains are only mildly affected by their ASD etc hence they think it's far easier to change and improve than it is for others. They assume everyone else is like them when we're not.

There's no textbook case of any condition that should be used as a baseline against which we should all be compared.

It's like saying 'Einstein had Aspergers and he was a genius therefore all people with Aspergers should be a genius too and if they aren't they just aren't trying hard enough'

Which is plainly ludicrous!


I completely agree with your point. So are we to divide people here into Einsteins and stupids (and the inbetweens:-), and who is to do it? Each 'category' (depending upon who puts whom into what category] will do the division differently, plus also, smart people can become rather stupid and behave rather stupidly. I know cause I was kind of smart,even very smart, and I did become really quite stupid...but recently am starting to smarten up a bit, and that is a wonderful feeling, as I cannot be me without doing that....

In terms of a baseline---everybody has his own subjective baseline for measuring anything and everything....

"Even if you were to cure me of all the psychological problems though the basic difference/defectiveness of my brain would still remain and still be causing me problems with other people who were expecting me to act in a more normal way."

Don't have time to go more deeply right now, but it is your opinion, not mine, that your brain is defective, and I do not buy the story that your brain is causing your problems. It is in my opinion probably your mind, meaning your way of thinking. love, littlebee

p.s. you are assuming it was easy for me to change. Actually it was bizarrely difficult and seemingly impossible. I have done the impossible, little by little, one step at a time. It was very difficult and painful....and I have and/or had all kinds of impairments and additional trauma on top of childhood trauma along the way, though in some respects I was also fortunate. It took a long time.... bear in mind I am over seventy, but I think for someone else it could take less time if that person received certain information, though it still might be kind of difficult. I am willing to share/unfold what I, myself, have discovered, but would like to go slow..



Last edited by littlebee on 21 Mar 2013, 3:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

mikassyna
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21 Mar 2013, 2:21 pm

Saying that Einstein had Asperger's is not factually correct. This has only been hypothesized through anecdotal observations, not clinical findings.



nessa238
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21 Mar 2013, 2:40 pm

mikassyna wrote:
Saying that Einstein had Asperger's is not factually correct. This has only been hypothesized through anecdotal observations, not clinical findings.


I know!

But it's the type of stupid thing that gets said about famous people - the Autism industry loves to try and co-opt
them into the fold

There's a whole picture book devoted to 'role-model people on the autistic spectrum' that includes
Einstein and Diane Fossey

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Different-Like- ... 1843108151

"Different Like Me introduces children aged 8-12 years to famous, inspirational figures from the world of science, art, maths, literature, philosophy and comedy. Eight-year-old Quinn, a young boy with Asperger's Syndrome, tells young readers about the achievements and characteristics of his autism heroes, from Albert Einstein, Dian Fossey and Wassily Kandinsky to Lewis Carroll, Benjamin Banneker and Julia Bowman Robinson, among others. All excel in different fields, but are united by the fact that they often found it difficult to fit in - just like Quinn. Fully illustrated in colour and written in child-friendly language, this book will be a wonderful resource for children, particularly children with autism, their parents, teachers, carers and siblings."

The implication is there that they had an ASD of some sort imo



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21 Mar 2013, 3:50 pm

MjrMajorMajor wrote:
Dizzee wrote:
I think It's possible, but it might be too hard for some of us, I mean who knows perhaps some people just don't want to start growing up, but It's really a
broad term.

I see this tone in many of these threads, and I do find it offensive. Can coping skills be developed...absolutely. People can always improve. The tone of your post says to me that if you continue to struggle, it's your own fault. We should be able to function completely normally, and are lazy if we don't. Correct me if I'm wrong.


agreed



qawer
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21 Mar 2013, 4:30 pm

Asperger Syndrome is a pervasive developmental disorder.

It's not wrong software installed on the right hardware. The hardware is fundamentally different. You cannot change it unless you change the brain itself, which is to change the human entirely.

Hence, autism is life-long and permanent.

Coping techniques may improve quality of life, however. We can help each other by discussing those techniques.



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21 Mar 2013, 5:02 pm

qawer wrote:
Asperger Syndrome is a pervasive developmental disorder.

It's not wrong software installed on the right hardware. The hardware is fundamentally different. You cannot change it unless you change the brain itself, which is to change the human entirely.

Hence, autism is life-long and permanent.

Coping techniques may improve quality of life, however. We can help each other by discussing those techniques.



Agree fully with this statement.

Diet can apparently help too, with reducing some symptoms in severity. But basically it is fundamental and permanent.


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Jaden
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21 Mar 2013, 5:09 pm

Asperger's Syndrome is a Neurological difference, not a psychological one, so there is no "growing out of" it. You may adapt to deal with your issues in better ways and allow you to function, but the difference will always be there.


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21 Mar 2013, 5:38 pm

I don't believe it at all. I have yet to grow out of it. That's like telling blind people to grow out of it and start seeing things.



seaturtleisland
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21 Mar 2013, 7:36 pm

Drehmaschine wrote:
I don't believe it at all. I have yet to grow out of it. That's like telling blind people to grow out of it and start seeing things.


Well I wasn't blind but I did grow out of not having a sense of smell so...



League_Girl
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22 Mar 2013, 12:11 am

seaturtleisland wrote:
Drehmaschine wrote:
I don't believe it at all. I have yet to grow out of it. That's like telling blind people to grow out of it and start seeing things.


Well I wasn't blind but I did grow out of not having a sense of smell so...



I was deaf one time in my life and then I could hear again.


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Ichinin
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22 Mar 2013, 2:14 pm

nessa238 wrote:
You've contradicted yourself there

The first half of your post is saying 'If you study NTs enough you can learn to be like them' then the second half says 'Just be as weird as you like and to hell with what anyone else thinks!'

So which strategy is it that you are recommending?


No. I am recommending to study NT's to learn to function sufficiently in society, not to emulate their every move. You can still be yourself as long as you contribute to society.

No amount of - well, anything - can make me like sports or such boring team activities.


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Jaden
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22 Mar 2013, 2:43 pm

Ichinin wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
You've contradicted yourself there

The first half of your post is saying 'If you study NTs enough you can learn to be like them' then the second half says 'Just be as weird as you like and to hell with what anyone else thinks!'

So which strategy is it that you are recommending?


No. I am recommending to study NT's to learn to function sufficiently in society, not to emulate their every move. You can still be yourself as long as you contribute to society.

No amount of - well, anything - can make me like sports or such boring team activities.


Ok, so what is your definition of "contributing to society" and how does that have anything to do with whether or not someone can be themselves?


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Drehmaschine
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22 Mar 2013, 4:04 pm

League_Girl wrote:
seaturtleisland wrote:
Drehmaschine wrote:
I don't believe it at all. I have yet to grow out of it. That's like telling blind people to grow out of it and start seeing things.


Well I wasn't blind but I did grow out of not having a sense of smell so...


I was deaf one time in my life and then I could hear again.


What I am saying is that someone can't tell you to just snap out of it and you will be fine. You didn't get to hear because someone told you to stop being deaf and start hearing. My English still needs work but this is what I am saying not that someone's fate can't change. I'm tired of people saying that we need to grow up and stop being autistic. This is all.



tall-p
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22 Mar 2013, 4:27 pm

Drehmaschine wrote:
What I am saying is that someone can't tell you to just snap out of it and you will be fine. You didn't get to hear because someone told you to stop being deaf and start hearing. My English still needs work but this is what I am saying not that someone's fate can't change. I'm tired of people saying that we need to grow up and stop being autistic. This is all.

My father thought that I lacked discipline. He was very disappointed in me. We never had a normal conversation ever... and he lived into his 90's. He was always trying to teach me how to "be normal."


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22 Mar 2013, 10:41 pm

I have outgrown a lot of my symptoms, but I still have a lot of them. I've improved my ability to read body language, but I still don't have any friends. I still stim a lot, but I usually only fidget when I'm being social. If I'm somewhere where I won't see anyone again I don't put as much effort into masking my symptoms. I still talk about my special interests too much, but they're not ten minute monologues anymore. It seems like I can either not talk about my interests at all or talk about them too much. I still don't know very many ways to get to a happy medium. One way I know is to only talk about it if someone brought it up first. I'm only sixteen right now, hopefully when I'm an adult I'll be able to function normally.


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