Am I above average looking, just average or ugly?

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Ratae
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04 May 2013, 2:42 pm

I'm having a tough time on internet dating and offline as well. My dating profile is well written but I'm getting no responses from women. I'm 34 and 5ft10. I must of sent out several 100's of 1st messages with 0 replies over the last 4 months.

I then created a 'fake' dating account with pictures of a tall, hunky masculine dude with a poorly written profile and got 12 responses in the first 2 days...all from women who contacted me first :cry: . This blew my mind.. This has made me believe that my looks are playing a part in my undesirability. I knew this all along, for many years. I was a virgin until 29 and believe the lack of opportunities was because I wasn't in the top 25% of guys (in terms of looks). Please evaluate me and give criticism good or bad. Thanks.

http://oi45.tinypic.com/4fwv4i.jpg

http://oi45.tinypic.com/332v4lt.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/auU2H5V.jpg



cathylynn
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04 May 2013, 2:47 pm

you are nice-looking, but a smile would improve your attractiveness.



Stargazer43
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04 May 2013, 3:05 pm

Well seeing as I'm not attracted to men, I can't provide too much information, but I can assure you based on your pictures that if anything is hindering you with women, it isn't your appearance. I actually know 2-3 people who look extremely similar to you, and they seem to always have women all over them lol. It is almost assuredly related more to how you are approaching people, what you are saying, who you are approaching, and your personality. And based on your past posting history, I would say that your attitude and thoughts towards women probably play a large role as well.



metaldanielle
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04 May 2013, 3:10 pm

cathylynn wrote:
you are nice-looking, but a smile would improve your attractiveness.

^ This
You look unfriendly, almost scary in the first two.


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04 May 2013, 3:14 pm

You look slightly above-average in the first two pics, and just average in the third one to answer your question.



Uprising
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04 May 2013, 3:29 pm

Your facial features aren't the problem if you ask me, but you do need to thighten up physically if you want to be hotter looking as I think the physique might be the problem with okcupid.

Not that I am a good example of good looks myself but you asked for an honest opinion.



Cafeaulait
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04 May 2013, 3:36 pm

Uprising wrote:
Your facial features aren't the problem if you ask me, but you do need to thighten up physically if you want to be hotter looking as I think the physique might be the problem with okcupid.

Not that I am a good example of good looks myself but you asked for an honest opinion.


I agree. And the smile. Do youu have this pics on your datingsite? they are not very inviting..



Madeline
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04 May 2013, 3:40 pm

I think you have nice facial features but, like others have said, a smile would make you more approachable. Rather than the photos, is your dating profile's text off-putting?



Tsproggy
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04 May 2013, 3:43 pm

I'm a guy but I believe you're a handsome dude. I have a bit of the same problems, I don't blink a whole lot when in conversation and I don't smile very much and this tends to alienate people thinking I'm some rigid, cold, scary dude when I'm not. Then they meet me and feel bad that they felt that lol.



Tequila
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04 May 2013, 3:52 pm

I never would have guessed that you were English. I thought you'd be some American from some place like Tennessee or somewhere.



Uprising
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04 May 2013, 4:01 pm

Tequila wrote:
I never would have guessed that you were English. I thought you'd be some American from some place like Tennessee or somewhere.

Love that avatar...



windtreeman
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04 May 2013, 6:10 pm

Agreed, you're a good looking dude...just need that smile so you exude openness and joviality. I think a fit physique would do wonders to both your in-person confidence and your dating success. As you've already proven, when people can 'shop' for potential partners among dozens of options, they're going to get very shallow, very quickly. I'm not talking Arnold ripped or even stripping down to sub-12% bodyfat and a six pack...just a physique that says you care about your health, if you don't already have that (hard to tell in pics).


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yellowtamarin
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04 May 2013, 6:34 pm

It might be what you are saying in your messages on OkC, as you said, the women who responded positively to your fake profile wrote to you first. Or maybe something written in your profile.

I can't believe it would be your looks. You look good. I don't know about this "average" and "above average" stuff because it depends who you ask. But the way you look should not be causing hundreds of women to ignore your messages. The lack of a smile might be playing a part but wouldn't be the sole reason.

As for in the real world, again it has to be something other than your looks. You don't say anything about your negative experiences here so I can't comment further.



trollcatman
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04 May 2013, 6:59 pm

metaldanielle wrote:
cathylynn wrote:
you are nice-looking, but a smile would improve your attractiveness.

^ This
You look unfriendly, almost scary in the first two.


That often happens when people pose for making a photo in the mirror, it tends to look very unnatural. Same for webcam pics. In these photos you don't look approachable or friendly at all.
The third photo is better because it shows you doing something (watching a building or something), except this photo was taken at the wrong moment. You look a bit unhappy, but you were probably just squinting against the sun.

Instead of worrying about your looks, you could try to have pictures where you look like you are having fun, or at least with a more relaxed expression. And I don't know anything about fashion, but in all three pictures you are wearing very generic shirts.



billiscool
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04 May 2013, 7:49 pm

you look like a ''tough guy'' to me
like an mma fighter.



nessa238
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04 May 2013, 9:04 pm

To me you look of average attractiveness in the 1st and 3rd photos and of above average attractiveness in the 2nd photo

The main problem is that you aren't smiling in any of the photos and look anxious/not self-assured/stressed out in the photos