What do you do when you are obsessed with someone?

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Let's say that you really like someone and think about that person a lot. You are not sure how he/she feels about you but you have become friends. Do you tell them how you feel? Do you try to contact them more often or wait for him/her to initiate contact? Do you try to hide the fact that you are obsessed with him/her?

Yes, I learned the hard way that I should always hide it as well as I possibly can.

Most people find it creepy if you are obsessed with them. but if that person has feeling for you it could be different.

I had extreme trouble with romance because of this issue. men would show a little intrest and i would go crazy and then they would leave. but one day a man showd intrest and he liked me obsessing over him. now we are married. but i probably let him have sex with me too soon just because i was obsessed so be careful.

i was obsessed with someone for quite a while and hid it the whole time, i did not feel worse for doing so, i am not not obsessed with the person and they now dont apear in my life daily.

really depends on how you feel about teh person, you do feel you would regret not telling the person how you feel and what do you think the chances are of it backfiring if you told the person how you felt.

I always tend to be obsessed with one person. If I manage to get over someone I tend to feel really anxious and nervous and lost until I find someone else to replace them, even if it's someone fictional. Someone to imagine I'm with when I'm alone. It's probably not healthy, but I don't know anything I can do to change it. Just seems to be the way I am.

What do I do about it? Suffer, mostly. I learned the hard way that you should never show an obsession how you feel unless you are able to control how much you reveal at a time. Start with showing a mild interest and let it grow slowly rather than letting them realize you think about them constantly. Then I learned that I'm terrible at hiding how I feel and inevitably the moment they start to show even the slightest reciprocation (even if I'm only imagining it), I forget my control and the whole force of obsession comes out in one big rush. If someone felt the same way about me it might be different, but they never do. I always get my heart broken. People are not attracted to what they perceive as desperation. It's the way evolution has programmed human beings to be. If someone doesn't need you, they must have confidence and strength and instinctively people tend to feel attraction. If someone seems to need you, they become much less attractive.

I try (and failed badly) to hide it.

There's someone who at the moment is obsessed with me. Because of his behaviour, (which included contacting me all the time, moaning because he couldn't see me for 2 weeks and then throwing a paddy and blaming me for everything when he was told to leave me alone) we can't be friends any more.

Yeah, I get obsessions with people, then end up making myself out to be weird to them, which is not what I want to do. Being obsessed isn't the same as having a crush on someone (although I can have both on a man), so I can get obsessions with people of the same gender as me, meaning I become fascinated by them and sometimes competitive too, even though I don't know the person very well. I then fantasize of becoming best friends with that person, and believe it will come true, until I get myself more involved in that person and find they don't really want me. Thank God I can recognise non-verbal social cues, otherwise I would really make a fool of myself.

I am obsessed with bus-drivers, and I got an obsession with a female one in the company, and I began talking to her and becoming friends. I knew she liked me too to chat to because she asked me genuine questions like she was interested in being friends. But one day the bus broke down in the town where I live, and the other passengers phoned taxis and made their own way to their destinations. But I offered to stay with the driver because she looked a bit anxious and I was just trying to be nice. But I could tell she didn't want me there. She stepped off the bus to phone the mechanics and have a quick cigarette, and she also looked like she was trying to keep away from me, hoping I would go home. Me, being daft, didn't give in. Then she phoned her boyfriend up, and went to sit on a bench further along the street, leaving me in the empty bus. She came off the phone, but still sat there fiddling with it. I still tried to be nice, so I went up to her and tried to make conversation once more. She spoke a bit, then I gave her my email address. She took it and said she will send me an email tonight, then said, ''you'd better go, because the mechanics will be here and stuff.'' So I gave in and said goodbye and went. Now I really regret standing there with her, because I could tell she was a bit uncomfortable with me offering to wait with her. She didn't even send me an email, and this was 3 or 4 months ago. I don't care anyway, she was only a silly bus-driver I just happened to get obsessed with. She's not on the bus so much now anyway so I am trying to forget her and learn from that mistake. How could I have been so foolish?! Ah!

Wow, that is exactly how I feel! Close relatives often criticise and ask me why I need to get obsessed with people for, and I feel like you just described here. Sometimes I use people I'm obsessed with as a coping mechanism, like if I'm feeling anxious somewhere, I can imagine the person I'm mostly obsessed with if there with me, and I can kind of have mental conversations with them (mental meaning conversations in my mind). It usually works out pretty well.

My uncle once criticised me about my obsession with bus-drivers. He said, ''why are you so obsessed with bus-drivers? What difference does a man driving a bus make to a man walking down the street?'' That's just another question I get frequently asked that I cannot find an answer to. The answer is, ''I just do.''

I've also learned that hard lesson.

Same. I did try to hide it; but it was always obvious.

Not unless the friendship has become deep and extremely close. Even then, you can't reference an obsession since that will scare them away, but you can say things like "I really like you".



Wait. Contacting a person too often scares them away and will make them not want to be around you.



Always.

It's a good idea to let the obsession out as long as it's not around the person you are obsessed with. Making a journal about them or writing poetry/songs about them can be great outlets.

I had this a little while ago. A girl I'd known for a while I'd started to fall for. It eventually came to the point that she was persistently on my mind.

It was horrible, and for maybe half a year I was obsessed with her. After a while, I couldn't take it, I had to know how she felt about me, even if just to get a no answer, so I could get her out of my head and move on.

So I called her; didn't get a straight answer.

I wrote to her on Facebook; still couldn't get a straight answer.

Finally, I caught her in person, and asked her whether she liked me. She said she didn't, not in that way. She was very nice about it, and she didn't cripple me, but it had me down for a week.

But after that, that was it. I have my answer, I know nothing's going to happen, and I don't have to occupy myself with "what ifs".

And she's off my mind, which was the main goal. Looking back on how I handled it, I was very blunt, it was quite cringey, but I did it, and it is done.

Take a leap. If you miss, hopefully you'll only scrape your knee, but maybe you'll make it. But unless you jump, you'll never know the outcome.