Page 1 of 1 [ 4 posts ] 

Jacosaur
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 27 May 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 7

28 May 2013, 7:56 pm

I've been studying with an aspie from my class for a few weeks now. He is absolutely terrible at socializing but I was okay with that. I quickly developed a crush on him. Recently I told him that I am interested in him and wanted to get to know him. He asked what I had in mind. We both agreed on coffee and studying together. (I'm NT btw). He always misses some school each week and my teacher told me he has a terrible home life (Parents left and he cares for siblings). Now he has missed the past two weeks. I texted him a few days ago asking about our coffee studying plan. I told him to tell me if he is uninterested or annoyed and to be honest with me. He replied that he is still interested and his lack of attendance is due to life stuff that needs to be dealt with for the immediate future. I guess my question is do you think he is lying to me about being interested? I am trying to be forward and blunt with everything I say to him. Is it possible he still doesn't understand that I really like him? Or maybe he is worried about hurting me? This situation has me confused.



cathylynn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Aug 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,045
Location: northeast US

28 May 2013, 8:39 pm

unless you have other evidence, I would take him at his word. he is under plenty of pressure already. try to understand that. you made an offer. he accepted. be patient.



yellowtamarin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Sep 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,763
Location: Australia

28 May 2013, 8:41 pm

He hasn't been at school at all for two weeks. I doubt he's missing school to avoid you, that would be rather extreme. Wait until he returns and tee up the coffee then. I'd not pressure him at the moment while he's dealing with other stuff...that is, IMO it sounds like he's being honest with you. Or at least, even if he's not interested in dating you, he is almost certainly preoccupied with other things for the time being and I'd leave him alone until he is back to his regular routine.



Stargazer43
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Nov 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,604

28 May 2013, 8:44 pm

yellowtamarin wrote:
He hasn't been at school at all for two weeks. I doubt he's missing school to avoid you, that would be rather extreme. Wait until he returns and tee up the coffee then. I'd not pressure him at the moment while he's dealing with other stuff...that is, IMO it sounds like he's being honest with you. Or at least, even if he's not interested in dating you, he is almost certainly preoccupied with other things for the time being and I'd leave him alone until he is back to his regular routine.


I agree with this completely, You mentioned yourself that he has a lot of home issues to deal with, so I'm sure his mind is more than preoccupied if it has caused him to miss so much school. Just give him time and wait for things to get back to normal with him first.