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Jasper1
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28 Jul 2013, 4:42 am

auntblabby wrote:
am more of a hermit.


Me too!

As I get older, on an emotional level...I feel better. I'm not as emotional and reactive. Not as hard on myself. Can think clearer, but I increasingly become more and more of a hermit.

Basically, my situation gets worse, but I feel better about it. It's kind of messed up.



onks
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28 Jul 2013, 5:53 am

alexptrans wrote:
I know some people believe that AS gets "better" as you get older, and in some ways that's true for me because my symptoms are not as noticeable as they were when I was younger. But if I look past the symptoms at the way I actually feel, I've gotten worse. Because as I get older I increasingly understand how different I am from most NTs. My brother, who's eight years younger than me, has a closer relationship with my parents than I could ever dream of. More and more I find myself unable to connect with people to any non-superficial extent, and whenever I'm around people I increasingly feel like a sore thumb. Does anyone else feel worse with age?


I think it very much depends on what you define with getting better. For sure youll know probably better how to cope.
But for my understanding autism spectrum isnt the problem, it is the psychological problems related to it, and those can get worse or better.

Once you know it, it can get worse or better. I am not so sure how nice it is to know.
I myself find it at the moment very frustrating, because i have no idea how much this affects and affected my communication abilities.
I want to know it, just it is impossible to really find it out.

From what i had read here It feels a bit like the NT world is not about thinking and very intuitive. Many people dont know how these things are and they would never think about whether there is something wrong with them but the others.
Just wit aspies, they find it weird, disgusting and dont understand anything.
Also they tend to reject people with psychological problems, ... in a bad way. And not in a respectful/understanding way.

I think a way to look upon it is to separate aspergers and the common psychological problems.
And for the aspergers side i am not sure if you are "learning" intuitive skills.

maybe you do. Your brain never stands still
Though, there are probably some brain structure related boundaries.

And it feels like a bit it could be overload of the working memory or something like that. Sensory issues...
Which is probably very distressing. So even as a kid or baby you might just learn to ignore the things that trigger it.

Eventually this commonly working intuitive learning is such a thing. So you would "teach yourself" not to use this information.
And be a completely different person than most of the people.
How to "unteach this" and wether this is possible to psychologically stand it is a completely different question.

But yes, i think youll be able to develope your intuitive feelings, but depending on your level of affection.
I think when you get older this probably doesnt get worse just if, the autistic properties get better.

On the psychological thing it is very difficult to say. Though I think when people get older they get more tolerant. Means they are not going to tease you so much anymore and respect you more as a human.
But, of course frustration is a very big thing and triggers bad feelings.

When you're stuck things do get worse
which eventually can in turn reduce your intuitive skills again, because of the increased load.



maia
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28 Jul 2013, 6:35 am

I have been on an emotional ride of being up and down. I realized as I got out of my teens that I really wanted to stop fighting and struggling and that made my depression a lot harder to cope with. I am definitely worse when it comes to connecting with people even my family. I am quite distant with everyone.

I feel more exhausted than when I was in school. I had more of a longing to try and fit in when I was a teenager. Now I have become aware of the effects of what interacting does to me I have become aware of my need for a lot of space.
I pace and run around the place a lot more. Or maybe it's just that I have become more aware of it.

Definitely the understanding of people makes a huge difference as to how well I can function in a particular environment. I am more likely to isolate myself even more if I feel criticized, judged or mocked. I think it's a reaction to a therapist I had who did make me feel worse. I tried to convince myself to be the way she was saying I should be. I seemed to be doing better because I was masking and ignoring emotions and struggles I felt inside. When I stopped seeing her I went rapidly downhill.
Lately I have been feeling more smothered by people. I find it harder to deal with people and hate what way I am around people so I generally avoid them.



auntblabby
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28 Jul 2013, 3:44 pm

Jasper1 wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
am more of a hermit.


Me too! As I get older, on an emotional level...I feel better. I'm not as emotional and reactive. Not as hard on myself. Can think clearer, but I increasingly become more and more of a hermit. Basically, my situation gets worse, but I feel better about it. It's kind of messed up.

that was something I coulda said, as well.



Sniv
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28 Jul 2013, 4:30 pm

As a 45 yr old who only recently found out that he may be on the spectrum, I've spent the last few month contemplating why it is that it has taken me so long to get to the point where this possibility is being investigated.

When I was young, I know I had issues that may be attributed to autism. Because I didn't know that I may be different, I had optimism. I always figured that "things would just work out". You know, like everyone else I'd move through life in the "normal" way.

That didn't happen. I never left home, had few romantic relationships (by which I mean one). I maintained only a few friends at a time, and lost a few by misunderstanding (including a dear john from one of my oldest friends).

So as I've gotten older, I've gotten more frustrated that things haven't just worked out. My frustrations leads to anxiety, anxiety leads to me being more hypersensitive, and as a result my perception is that I am worse now than I was 20 years ago.

However getting worse directly led to me seeking help, and being put on this road of discovery.


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TheValk
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28 Jul 2013, 4:39 pm

Hmmm. I can talk fluently now, whereas I was mostly mute back in the day. I guess socialisation was destroyed around puberty time and I'm not sure if it will ever be repaired.