A question for bisexual women.

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Which is harder for you? To get a male date or a female date? A bf or a gf?

I've found it equally hard to find dates ~ finding someone you have something in common with is always difficult when you've got aspie tendencies. But I guess when it comes down to it, it would be finding a girlfriend. Before I began dating my husband (I always figured being bisexual meant I could marry either sex; it just happens that my life partner is male), I had crushes on various female friends. The main problem was the assumption that my girl friends are straight. I never had the guts to ask. I was really heartbroken when I discovered that my best friend -- who I had a crush on for years -- was gay when she began dating another girl.

Girlfriends. I can almost always find male sex partners, because it is the assumption in this society that heterosexuality is the norm (and because people expect you to be of one orientation or the other, not a separate orientation which encompasses both.)

To date a female. Like above posters already mentioned, it's not often that easy to detect a gay or bi female in the first place. Finding male candidates tends to be much more simple, also a lot of males are the first to approach you.

Female/gf. The pool is smaller.

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Ok, bi ladies, let me add a question, aside of the huge difference in pools, which was more complicated in term of relationship progression (the phase after first phase)?

It's different with different people, regardless of gender.

All males and females can be very, VERY difficult.

There's not much difference really. Both can be whiny, manipulative little sods and both can be the kindest, sweetest human beings.

I've only had one relationship with a female and that was much easier to get going than my relationships with men but we had a lot more in common and there were extenuating circumstances that helped. I didn't have to do almost any work in the beginning, she seduced me. Up until that point I didn't think I was attracted to women at all.

I have found my female partner to be a lot more understanding of many things that men just ignore or get angry about and a lot more patient and loving. However, she was a lot more demanding than my male partners but it turned out she is very demanding in relationships generally because we are still very good friends and I enjoy seeing her husband (yeah, she married a guy) be bossed about as much as I ever was.

I am bi but have only actually dated men, I suppose because I never went out of my way to specifically look for a female partner and the general assumption people make is that you are straight unless you clearly appear otherwise, and since I don't wave a big banner over my head that says "I AM BISEXUAL", women don't really approach me in that manner much, especially since I "look straight". Also, I am mostly attracted to feminine-looking girls, and a lot of them are straight and I'm not looking to "convert" anyone, lol. I have had crushes on girls who were gay/bi but I'm totally bad at flirting with girls for some reason, it's just different than with guys, guys are easier to read to me.

As several people mentioned, the individual is the rule in relationships (people are different.)

There were a few differences in the styles involved based on the person's gender in my experience, though--it was harder, in general, to get male partners to learn to talk about problems before they become so serious that bad things happen as a result of them. It was also harder, in general, for me to talk about some subjects with male partners (for instance, I could never quite get them to realize that after I've had a bad day is not a good time to come try to get booty for a little while. Again, in general, my male partners were MUCH more needy/less able to give me personal space than my female partners.

However, there were exceptions that went both ways, suggesting that the problem is cultural rather than biological.