On the verge of meltdown ............

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Well thanks for all the support , peeps .

Today we've been socialising with the girl's parents at the family home and thus far the day has been ok for me although we've just been chatting and doing little jobs in preparation for the big day .....I'm doing pretty well so far and everyone thinks I'm just a "normal" guy

If if only they knew the truth

It could be the calm before the storm though as us GUYS are going out for a lad's night out ! !

Just great ! !!
I'm not a drinker so I'm going to have to either join in with the booze fest or think quick on my feet and have soft drinks overlapping with shandy or something

I get on pretty well with her dad who's a regular " American guy" who loves golf and luckily I know a few golfers and I've watched a few golf series on TV so I can chat about that and other sports

Well we are scheduled to go out and "enjoy" ourselves soon .

They've said that we're out between 8 and 10 so the pressure is mounting somewhat .

At least it's casual so t- shirt and shorts .... although it's currently 81F and humid just to make things even worse ! !!

Pretend to have a bad headache (upset stomach, 24 hr flu, Montezuma's revenge or just feel like you may be coming down with something). Use that as a cover to take some time off. If I had a really bad headache I'd need to go lie down in a quiet, dark room for at least a few hours. Any of this should be perfectly understandable to NT's

A special big THANKS to the people who DID respond to my cry for help and your replies and suggestions DID help me enormously, I can honestly say that . It was helpful just to get responses from people who could actually understand my feelings . My immediate family are real caring types and two out of the three are in the education system but even with their background and training they sometimes feel that I'm either over - reacting or being to sensitive

I'm sorry I didn't see this sooner. What I've learned to do in very stressful social situations like you describe is to tell the people I don't want to offend (perhaps take them aside at some point and tell them privately) that I'm an extreme introvert and that being around a lot of people is very stressful for me, so please don't feel offended if I disappear from time to time to "recharge." What usually happens is that the people I've told this to will then become my co-conspirators and "enable" me to slink off and hide for awhile. Occasionally, some a**hole will decide that means I need to be dragged onto center stage, but that reaction is extremely rare. If that does happen, I grit my teeth and endure it with a smile until that person loses interest, then I avoid that person the rest of the time. Most people, however, are more than willing to help.

As an update ... I've been far too stressed to even contemplate putting my thoughts down here but it's apparant to all that I SURVIVED the ordeal of the wedding at the weekend .

I can honestly say that this has been the hardest time of my whole life - thankfully the wedding went like a dream for everyone else but the whole trip 12 days and counting has been a complete nightmare for me .

Thankfully , I will be home in our cosy little home within 48 hours and I can't wait . I will be able to do what I want , when I want , where I want

As opposed to being told what we are doing , when we are doing it and then having all those arrangements changed at the last moment .... sometimes plans have changed 3 or 4 times in a day ! !! !! !

I haven't got the time or memory to actually share all the horendous experiences and ordeals I have had to endure this past week or so and it's still NOT over ..... we are all ow going for a final BIG FAMILY meal / get together tomorrow lunchtime before we fly home tomorrow evening ..... so once again my social limitations and fussy feeding are going to be highlighted
as everyone else has a great time and I'm trying to find something I can eat - then try and force it down as I get stressed eating with others ....especially around a busy , bright lit table ...

I WISH IT WAS ALL OVER and I was back at home ! !!

So..... day 12 over but not without incident or upset

After I stressed out about something tonight .... possibly the tenth time today , my wife finally snapped at me and I didn't react well to it . I went into my "quiet " mode - which led to a few more " moments " during the evening . She's gone to bed in a huff and I'm too stressed and annoyed to go and make things right .

Hopefully we will both feel better in the morning and we can regroup

Tomorrow is our final day in the USA and we leave for the airport mid-afternoon so I just have to get through the last family meal / gathering at 12 moon and it's downhill all the way .... just al the waiting and queuing at the airport customs and the 10 hour flight ..

Gawd knows what type of restaurant we are going to go to or what I am going to be able to order , not forgetting that I will be too stressed to eat much anyways !

While there were moments and incidents in the end, it sounds as though you have made it through fairly intact. It sounds a lot like when I had to go to my wife's family reunion. While not as long, it was so overstimulating and I was worked up before we even left. I find that asking as many questions as I can before my wife can't take it anymore and really trying to plan as much as possible helps a lot. Of course, nothing beats being able to be at home where I have a sensory room, but it helps some. I am glad you made it through and hope that things with your wife cool off without further incident. You're in the homestretch now, you can almost breathe a big sigh of relief!

Thank you for the thoughts

8.09 am. Final day .

We are both awake and refreshed ..... and friends again this morning ... so far ....

Just going to get showered and dressed ( the easy part ) as I planned what clothes I'd be wearing for the homeward trip two weeks ago

Then the packing .... the important stuff goes in my hand luggage bag and the rest gets divided equally into two identical suitcases ..... I love planning ....

That's been one of the main problems really .... not knowing what on earth was planned for any given morning / afternoon ..... worse still was being told what to expect , spending ages asking questions and getting my head around things .... for the schedules to be changed sometimes twice or more that day ! !!

Home again !

I survived the ordeal but I'm not sure now long the " mental scars " will take to heal

Right .... after a life of having no dreams or at least not remembering any dreams or details .... I have had two nights of vivid , unnerving dreams where I wake up in a hot sweat after dreaming ... Tonight's involved getting lost in a strange town /area and meeting and proving myself to complete strangers .... tonight's also involved enduring a couple of scary rollercoaster rides .... I never ever go on them normally. ! !

I cant help wondering if these nightmares are a direct result of the horrendous two weeks I've been through ??

How long will they last do you reckon ?

Can I do anything to stop them ?

Kinda worried about ing back to sleep now

Well a truly huge thank you to all those who posted lovely , caring replies .

Can't help be underwhelmed by the pityful response in general though , considering we have approx. 80, 000 members ! !

Is there anybody there .............