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kittylover
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19 Mar 2014, 12:28 pm

A common saying is that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. What if your problem is permanent? Doctors tell me that they can't make me look female...



Prism
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19 Mar 2014, 4:37 pm

kittylover wrote:
A common saying is that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. What if your problem is permanent? Doctors tell me that they can't make me look female...


Indeed, this was another issue I was thinking about. We would basically have to wait for the technology to arrive, that would be the best thing honestly. Like Misery said, since we all die anyways, we might as well wait to see if things improve technology wise...


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Just came back on, for idk, nobody seems to agree with anything I say on here... just makes me feel even more alone.


kittylover
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21 Mar 2014, 5:19 am

Prism wrote:
Indeed, this was another issue I was thinking about. We would basically have to wait for the technology to arrive, that would be the best thing honestly. Like Misery said, since we all die anyways, we might as well wait to see if things improve technology wise...


If I knew for certain that such technology were coming in 2034, I still would think about suicide. I don't think I could handle 20 more years of this intense pain.



Prism
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04 Apr 2014, 3:06 pm

kittylover wrote:
Prism wrote:
Indeed, this was another issue I was thinking about. We would basically have to wait for the technology to arrive, that would be the best thing honestly. Like Misery said, since we all die anyways, we might as well wait to see if things improve technology wise...


If I knew for certain that such technology were coming in 2034, I still would think about suicide. I don't think I could handle 20 more years of this intense pain.


Yeah, I feel the same way. When I'm out sign holding, I often think I will kill myself on December 25th if this doesn't happen soon enough. Sometimes I like to think of reincarnation, that maybe if I kill myself I might come back as a girl. Then I'd finally be a natural girl. Only problem is losing all the memories... with loss of memories comes the loss of empathy. I'm just trying to stay alive so I can keep these memories. I also want an age regression to 10 and just stay that way as a girl. Adulthood never interested me anyways.

Death is also so uncertain. Even if there is reincarnation, there is no guarantee you'll be reborn in a better situation. In fact you could be born worse, like same condition as now only born prematurely so you have a feeding tube, etc.


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Just came back on, for idk, nobody seems to agree with anything I say on here... just makes me feel even more alone.


kittylover
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12 Apr 2014, 5:24 am

I don't believe in reincarnation or any afterlife, so death is just nothingness to me; a cessation of consciousness. But this would be preferable to my existence now - zero is greater than all negative numbers.



Prism
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12 Apr 2014, 5:25 pm

kittylover wrote:
I don't believe in reincarnation or any afterlife, so death is just nothingness to me; a cessation of consciousness. But this would be preferable to my existence now - zero is greater than all negative numbers.


Regardless of what you believe. Would you rather risk being wrong and perhaps death is only the full blown opposite of what we expect? Perhaps nothingness is an eternity of pain, as we would no longer have bodies to divide us from pain itself... that's a possibility. It would be best to invest on things we at least know of, then to toss everything aside for something we no longer can escape. Technology is improving constantly. Few days ago I heard they are currently developing hearts from 3d printers etc. Me, I've been thinking to at least give it time until my parents die before I truly consider suicide.

What do you have to lose except time? Death is just so uncertain still... I'd rather you be able to somehow find something in the future to help make you content, rather then toss it all away and give into a possibility of pain you can't escape. :(


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Just came back on, for idk, nobody seems to agree with anything I say on here... just makes me feel even more alone.


kittylover
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20 Apr 2014, 12:37 pm

Prism wrote:
What do you have to lose except time? Death is just so uncertain still... I'd rather you be able to somehow find something in the future to help make you content, rather then toss it all away and give into a possibility of pain you can't escape. :(


Time being alive is causing me pain. Every hour I'm awake I'm dreading my existence. Since I don't believe anything happens after death - that the possibility you speak of is zero - it seems as though not existing is an improvement from my current state.



Prism
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23 Apr 2014, 10:20 pm

kittylover wrote:
Prism wrote:
What do you have to lose except time? Death is just so uncertain still... I'd rather you be able to somehow find something in the future to help make you content, rather then toss it all away and give into a possibility of pain you can't escape. :(


Time being alive is causing me pain. Every hour I'm awake I'm dreading my existence. Since I don't believe anything happens after death - that the possibility you speak of is zero - it seems as though not existing is an improvement from my current state.


Well if that is what you want to believe, I can't change that. I too have begun to start giving into the thought of suicide, as I was only living for my parents whom seem to think I'm not giving them enough as it is... just got fired from another job today as well. Just know that there are people whom care about you in this world, me for example, though I'm nothing more then a internet presence I know.


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Just came back on, for idk, nobody seems to agree with anything I say on here... just makes me feel even more alone.


goldfish21
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27 Apr 2014, 10:52 pm

While death is a perfectly natural occurrence in the cycle of life & rebirth, IMO, suicide is not an optimal way to go. It's giving up, quitting, cowardice etc vs. learning, changing, growing, striving, overcoming (yourself, suicidal thoughts, challenges etc.) & eventually dying a death worth dying whether via natural causes or by going down fighting - whether for victory, defending yourself etc.

As for suicidal thoughts themselves: I had them off and on throughout my life since childhood. They were the worst a couple of Summers ago when I had the worst depression of my life that just kept getting worse for 5 months or so. It was then that I figured out I had a chemical sensitivity to salicylate acids (and have read that 70% of those on the spectrum do) & instantly stopped eating/drinking or using anything on my skin with sa's. (sa's are plants' natural pesticide & preservative. they're sky high in gmo foods. they're in almost every fruit/veggie/herb/spice/plant oil and are much stronger in others.) Besides not eating them, I learned that I needed to use epsom salts on my skin to detox them via absorbing the magnesium sulphate, which I was deficient in due to taking Dexedrine - an ADHD stimulant that depletes magnesium & sulphur from the body. I've been using homemade epsom salt lotion on my skin daily for a year and a half or so now, but when I first started using it - the horribly negative clinical depression and near constant passively suicidal thoughts I was having all but completely disappeared after about 5 days. It was all a chemical induced drug trip.

I'm 100% serious about this and very highly recommend you experiment with some epsom salt lotion on your skin, especially the bottoms of your feet where you absorb it best. Either that or soak your feet in hot water saturated with epsom salts. Lotion is just more convenient. You can buy epsom salt lotion at pretty well any pharmacy/major grocery store.

If you have any questions about this, or about the other dietary/herbal/probiotic treatments I've had life changing success with as stated in the link in my sig, feel free to pm me as I'm a completely transparent open book about it all with anyone who would care to listen to it, learn from it, try it for themselves. Especially if it can be life saving as could be in the case of anyone who is having suicidal thoughts.

For anyone else reading this, feel free to PM as well. As for success since doing all of this: I haven't been suicidal - at all. I'm healthier, stronger, more productive (work), much more optimistic, wealthier (saving/investing more money than I have in my life before this) & continue to strive for and achieve new goals on a regular basis. Life is good & getting better. I'm still not at the point in life/work/business/finances that I'd consider that I'd consider myself successful or I've reached anywhere near my potential - but relative to 2 years ago; I'm definitely successful as I've leaped ahead immensely with improvements too numerous to count. Success isn't just about money, but being able to function in life and be financially stable and eventually successful is certainly advantageous and I intend to continue focusing on this, as well as health/fitness, and every other goal I have in life. I hope all of you find it within yourselves to do whatever you're able to to improve yourselves and better your lives vs. give in to thoughts of suicide. I hope that those of you who do have suicidal thoughts have a similar attitude to myself when I had them really badly: know that they're just thoughts and can't hurt you - only your actions can. Ignore those thoughts and realize there's something wrong, something causing them, and potentially a biochemical reason for it like I eventually figured out for myself. That or certain stressors, life events etc - but that those, too, are just things that happened and aren't worth no longer existing over. If you're of the school of thought that there's bound to be a logical rational reason WHY you have suicidal thoughts and know that there must be some way to change your thinking, change your thought processes, that you weren't always this way and that something is making you this way and thus something else can unmake you think that way.. then I urge you to explore the possibility that you, too, are among the vast majority of us on the spectrum that are sensitive to salicylate acids. Learn to avoid them for several months, detox them via epsom salts. If it isn't that, then at least you'll have explored an option and figured out it wasn't that - which is better than not trying anything at all, IMO.

I'm rambling.. so, I'll stop. Suicide is bad mmmkay? PM me if you want to chat about anything I've shared here.


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Prism
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28 Apr 2014, 2:35 pm

goldfish21 wrote:
While death is a perfectly natural occurrence in the cycle of life & rebirth, IMO, suicide is not an optimal way to go. It's giving up, quitting, cowardice etc vs. learning, changing, growing, striving, overcoming (yourself, suicidal thoughts, challenges etc.) & eventually dying a death worth dying whether via natural causes or by going down fighting - whether for victory, defending yourself etc.

As for suicidal thoughts themselves: I had them off and on throughout my life since childhood. They were the worst a couple of Summers ago when I had the worst depression of my life that just kept getting worse for 5 months or so. It was then that I figured out I had a chemical sensitivity to salicylate acids (and have read that 70% of those on the spectrum do) & instantly stopped eating/drinking or using anything on my skin with sa's. (sa's are plants' natural pesticide & preservative. they're sky high in gmo foods. they're in almost every fruit/veggie/herb/spice/plant oil and are much stronger in others.) Besides not eating them, I learned that I needed to use epsom salts on my skin to detox them via absorbing the magnesium sulphate, which I was deficient in due to taking Dexedrine - an ADHD stimulant that depletes magnesium & sulphur from the body. I've been using homemade epsom salt lotion on my skin daily for a year and a half or so now, but when I first started using it - the horribly negative clinical depression and near constant passively suicidal thoughts I was having all but completely disappeared after about 5 days. It was all a chemical induced drug trip.

I'm 100% serious about this and very highly recommend you experiment with some epsom salt lotion on your skin, especially the bottoms of your feet where you absorb it best. Either that or soak your feet in hot water saturated with epsom salts. Lotion is just more convenient. You can buy epsom salt lotion at pretty well any pharmacy/major grocery store.

If you have any questions about this, or about the other dietary/herbal/probiotic treatments I've had life changing success with as stated in the link in my sig, feel free to pm me as I'm a completely transparent open book about it all with anyone who would care to listen to it, learn from it, try it for themselves. Especially if it can be life saving as could be in the case of anyone who is having suicidal thoughts.

For anyone else reading this, feel free to PM as well. As for success since doing all of this: I haven't been suicidal - at all. I'm healthier, stronger, more productive (work), much more optimistic, wealthier (saving/investing more money than I have in my life before this) & continue to strive for and achieve new goals on a regular basis. Life is good & getting better. I'm still not at the point in life/work/business/finances that I'd consider that I'd consider myself successful or I've reached anywhere near my potential - but relative to 2 years ago; I'm definitely successful as I've leaped ahead immensely with improvements too numerous to count. Success isn't just about money, but being able to function in life and be financially stable and eventually successful is certainly advantageous and I intend to continue focusing on this, as well as health/fitness, and every other goal I have in life. I hope all of you find it within yourselves to do whatever you're able to to improve yourselves and better your lives vs. give in to thoughts of suicide. I hope that those of you who do have suicidal thoughts have a similar attitude to myself when I had them really badly: know that they're just thoughts and can't hurt you - only your actions can. Ignore those thoughts and realize there's something wrong, something causing them, and potentially a biochemical reason for it like I eventually figured out for myself. That or certain stressors, life events etc - but that those, too, are just things that happened and aren't worth no longer existing over. If you're of the school of thought that there's bound to be a logical rational reason WHY you have suicidal thoughts and know that there must be some way to change your thinking, change your thought processes, that you weren't always this way and that something is making you this way and thus something else can unmake you think that way.. then I urge you to explore the possibility that you, too, are among the vast majority of us on the spectrum that are sensitive to salicylate acids. Learn to avoid them for several months, detox them via epsom salts. If it isn't that, then at least you'll have explored an option and figured out it wasn't that - which is better than not trying anything at all, IMO.

I'm rambling.. so, I'll stop. Suicide is bad mmmkay? PM me if you want to chat about anything I've shared here.


You do realize you're in the lgbt discussion right? We're talking about transgender issues, not a chemical system gone wrong. Suicide isn't really a "bad" thing. It helps end suffering for those who can no longer deal with it, due to just being born with a set of cards that do them nothing in this life. We all die eventually as stated before, so that totally wipes out anything about it being "cowardly" to die early, those with that opinion will die anyways and will no longer matter too. In fact I think it's actually a "brave" thing to do since nobody knows what happens when one dies and one is taking action to relieve themselves of a pain nobody can cure. My only wish is for technology to improve to the point that everything can be totally improved so people can have a second chance, but it doesn't seem very likely, and a large majority of people still treat transgender as a terrible pestilence in society... so it really doesn't even look worthy to live that long for that technology when people will probably treat you worse. There's just too many factors against living.


_________________
Just came back on, for idk, nobody seems to agree with anything I say on here... just makes me feel even more alone.


goldfish21
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29 Apr 2014, 2:55 am

Prism wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
While death is a perfectly natural occurrence in the cycle of life & rebirth, IMO, suicide is not an optimal way to go. It's giving up, quitting, cowardice etc vs. learning, changing, growing, striving, overcoming (yourself, suicidal thoughts, challenges etc.) & eventually dying a death worth dying whether via natural causes or by going down fighting - whether for victory, defending yourself etc.

As for suicidal thoughts themselves: I had them off and on throughout my life since childhood. They were the worst a couple of Summers ago when I had the worst depression of my life that just kept getting worse for 5 months or so. It was then that I figured out I had a chemical sensitivity to salicylate acids (and have read that 70% of those on the spectrum do) & instantly stopped eating/drinking or using anything on my skin with sa's. (sa's are plants' natural pesticide & preservative. they're sky high in gmo foods. they're in almost every fruit/veggie/herb/spice/plant oil and are much stronger in others.) Besides not eating them, I learned that I needed to use epsom salts on my skin to detox them via absorbing the magnesium sulphate, which I was deficient in due to taking Dexedrine - an ADHD stimulant that depletes magnesium & sulphur from the body. I've been using homemade epsom salt lotion on my skin daily for a year and a half or so now, but when I first started using it - the horribly negative clinical depression and near constant passively suicidal thoughts I was having all but completely disappeared after about 5 days. It was all a chemical induced drug trip.

I'm 100% serious about this and very highly recommend you experiment with some epsom salt lotion on your skin, especially the bottoms of your feet where you absorb it best. Either that or soak your feet in hot water saturated with epsom salts. Lotion is just more convenient. You can buy epsom salt lotion at pretty well any pharmacy/major grocery store.

If you have any questions about this, or about the other dietary/herbal/probiotic treatments I've had life changing success with as stated in the link in my sig, feel free to pm me as I'm a completely transparent open book about it all with anyone who would care to listen to it, learn from it, try it for themselves. Especially if it can be life saving as could be in the case of anyone who is having suicidal thoughts.

For anyone else reading this, feel free to PM as well. As for success since doing all of this: I haven't been suicidal - at all. I'm healthier, stronger, more productive (work), much more optimistic, wealthier (saving/investing more money than I have in my life before this) & continue to strive for and achieve new goals on a regular basis. Life is good & getting better. I'm still not at the point in life/work/business/finances that I'd consider that I'd consider myself successful or I've reached anywhere near my potential - but relative to 2 years ago; I'm definitely successful as I've leaped ahead immensely with improvements too numerous to count. Success isn't just about money, but being able to function in life and be financially stable and eventually successful is certainly advantageous and I intend to continue focusing on this, as well as health/fitness, and every other goal I have in life. I hope all of you find it within yourselves to do whatever you're able to to improve yourselves and better your lives vs. give in to thoughts of suicide. I hope that those of you who do have suicidal thoughts have a similar attitude to myself when I had them really badly: know that they're just thoughts and can't hurt you - only your actions can. Ignore those thoughts and realize there's something wrong, something causing them, and potentially a biochemical reason for it like I eventually figured out for myself. That or certain stressors, life events etc - but that those, too, are just things that happened and aren't worth no longer existing over. If you're of the school of thought that there's bound to be a logical rational reason WHY you have suicidal thoughts and know that there must be some way to change your thinking, change your thought processes, that you weren't always this way and that something is making you this way and thus something else can unmake you think that way.. then I urge you to explore the possibility that you, too, are among the vast majority of us on the spectrum that are sensitive to salicylate acids. Learn to avoid them for several months, detox them via epsom salts. If it isn't that, then at least you'll have explored an option and figured out it wasn't that - which is better than not trying anything at all, IMO.

I'm rambling.. so, I'll stop. Suicide is bad mmmkay? PM me if you want to chat about anything I've shared here.


You do realize you're in the lgbt discussion right? We're talking about transgender issues, not a chemical system gone wrong. Suicide isn't really a "bad" thing. It helps end suffering for those who can no longer deal with it, due to just being born with a set of cards that do them nothing in this life. We all die eventually as stated before, so that totally wipes out anything about it being "cowardly" to die early, those with that opinion will die anyways and will no longer matter too. In fact I think it's actually a "brave" thing to do since nobody knows what happens when one dies and one is taking action to relieve themselves of a pain nobody can cure. My only wish is for technology to improve to the point that everything can be totally improved so people can have a second chance, but it doesn't seem very likely, and a large majority of people still treat transgender as a terrible pestilence in society... so it really doesn't even look worthy to live that long for that technology when people will probably treat you worse. There's just too many factors against living.


I realize full well this is the lgbt forum. I'm gay.

You do realize this is an aspergers/autism forum, right? We're talking about neurological issues, thought processes, paradigms, self image, reactions etc.

I get that trans issues are different, but I've still met some super positive outgoing optimistic trans people who don't think negatively. This one in particular was so super self accepting and full of life even though her family disowned her and her kids won't have anything to do with her since she decided to transition from the he she used to be. Still, she's positive and moving forward with life and the work she's passionate about and so on.

It's been my experience that depression, suicidal thoughts, negativity and so forth can all be brought about by chemical imbalances caused by foods/environmental toxins, and can be successfully treated resulting in a whole heck of a lot happier and more self accepting person.


_________________
No :heart: for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.


Prism
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29 Apr 2014, 9:49 am

goldfish21 wrote:
Prism wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
While death is a perfectly natural occurrence in the cycle of life & rebirth, IMO, suicide is not an optimal way to go. It's giving up, quitting, cowardice etc vs. learning, changing, growing, striving, overcoming (yourself, suicidal thoughts, challenges etc.) & eventually dying a death worth dying whether via natural causes or by going down fighting - whether for victory, defending yourself etc.

As for suicidal thoughts themselves: I had them off and on throughout my life since childhood. They were the worst a couple of Summers ago when I had the worst depression of my life that just kept getting worse for 5 months or so. It was then that I figured out I had a chemical sensitivity to salicylate acids (and have read that 70% of those on the spectrum do) & instantly stopped eating/drinking or using anything on my skin with sa's. (sa's are plants' natural pesticide & preservative. they're sky high in gmo foods. they're in almost every fruit/veggie/herb/spice/plant oil and are much stronger in others.) Besides not eating them, I learned that I needed to use epsom salts on my skin to detox them via absorbing the magnesium sulphate, which I was deficient in due to taking Dexedrine - an ADHD stimulant that depletes magnesium & sulphur from the body. I've been using homemade epsom salt lotion on my skin daily for a year and a half or so now, but when I first started using it - the horribly negative clinical depression and near constant passively suicidal thoughts I was having all but completely disappeared after about 5 days. It was all a chemical induced drug trip.

I'm 100% serious about this and very highly recommend you experiment with some epsom salt lotion on your skin, especially the bottoms of your feet where you absorb it best. Either that or soak your feet in hot water saturated with epsom salts. Lotion is just more convenient. You can buy epsom salt lotion at pretty well any pharmacy/major grocery store.

If you have any questions about this, or about the other dietary/herbal/probiotic treatments I've had life changing success with as stated in the link in my sig, feel free to pm me as I'm a completely transparent open book about it all with anyone who would care to listen to it, learn from it, try it for themselves. Especially if it can be life saving as could be in the case of anyone who is having suicidal thoughts.

For anyone else reading this, feel free to PM as well. As for success since doing all of this: I haven't been suicidal - at all. I'm healthier, stronger, more productive (work), much more optimistic, wealthier (saving/investing more money than I have in my life before this) & continue to strive for and achieve new goals on a regular basis. Life is good & getting better. I'm still not at the point in life/work/business/finances that I'd consider that I'd consider myself successful or I've reached anywhere near my potential - but relative to 2 years ago; I'm definitely successful as I've leaped ahead immensely with improvements too numerous to count. Success isn't just about money, but being able to function in life and be financially stable and eventually successful is certainly advantageous and I intend to continue focusing on this, as well as health/fitness, and every other goal I have in life. I hope all of you find it within yourselves to do whatever you're able to to improve yourselves and better your lives vs. give in to thoughts of suicide. I hope that those of you who do have suicidal thoughts have a similar attitude to myself when I had them really badly: know that they're just thoughts and can't hurt you - only your actions can. Ignore those thoughts and realize there's something wrong, something causing them, and potentially a biochemical reason for it like I eventually figured out for myself. That or certain stressors, life events etc - but that those, too, are just things that happened and aren't worth no longer existing over. If you're of the school of thought that there's bound to be a logical rational reason WHY you have suicidal thoughts and know that there must be some way to change your thinking, change your thought processes, that you weren't always this way and that something is making you this way and thus something else can unmake you think that way.. then I urge you to explore the possibility that you, too, are among the vast majority of us on the spectrum that are sensitive to salicylate acids. Learn to avoid them for several months, detox them via epsom salts. If it isn't that, then at least you'll have explored an option and figured out it wasn't that - which is better than not trying anything at all, IMO.

I'm rambling.. so, I'll stop. Suicide is bad mmmkay? PM me if you want to chat about anything I've shared here.


You do realize you're in the lgbt discussion right? We're talking about transgender issues, not a chemical system gone wrong. Suicide isn't really a "bad" thing. It helps end suffering for those who can no longer deal with it, due to just being born with a set of cards that do them nothing in this life. We all die eventually as stated before, so that totally wipes out anything about it being "cowardly" to die early, those with that opinion will die anyways and will no longer matter too. In fact I think it's actually a "brave" thing to do since nobody knows what happens when one dies and one is taking action to relieve themselves of a pain nobody can cure. My only wish is for technology to improve to the point that everything can be totally improved so people can have a second chance, but it doesn't seem very likely, and a large majority of people still treat transgender as a terrible pestilence in society... so it really doesn't even look worthy to live that long for that technology when people will probably treat you worse. There's just too many factors against living.


I realize full well this is the lgbt forum. I'm gay.

You do realize this is an aspergers/autism forum, right? We're talking about neurological issues, thought processes, paradigms, self image, reactions etc.

I get that trans issues are different, but I've still met some super positive outgoing optimistic trans people who don't think negatively. This one in particular was so super self accepting and full of life even though her family disowned her and her kids won't have anything to do with her since she decided to transition from the he she used to be. Still, she's positive and moving forward with life and the work she's passionate about and so on.

It's been my experience that depression, suicidal thoughts, negativity and so forth can all be brought about by chemical imbalances caused by foods/environmental toxins, and can be successfully treated resulting in a whole heck of a lot happier and more self accepting person.


Didn't have to respond with a sarcastic remark, was just making sure you were posting knowing where you were posting. Everyone is different, I hate when people say so and so is trans, but she's living a happy life, why the f**k are you complaining? Lol. Ooh, I'm automatically that person since we happen to have "one" similar issue. Sorry, but I heard about everything you said before through other people and places, that's really not going to help me. You might say in response then why are you posting here? Simple, I want to see different responses other then the obvious.


_________________
Just came back on, for idk, nobody seems to agree with anything I say on here... just makes me feel even more alone.


LoveNotHate
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29 Apr 2014, 6:57 pm

I do think of suicide often. Usually, when I lie in bed, I wishfully think of how good life will be when I am dead. I imagine I will go in the backyard and shoot myself with a pistol, and make sure to leave a note so my mom does not think there was "foul play".

I won the battle with GD, however, it is hard to live with the brain damage (autism). Where does autism lead to? Spending my entire life alone, memorizing and ordering information?

I watch movies, watch youtube videos, research my personal interests, play some video games, and this makes me happy. So, I put it out of my mind, and continue for another day.



goldfish21
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29 Apr 2014, 10:24 pm

Prism wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
Prism wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
While death is a perfectly natural occurrence in the cycle of life & rebirth, IMO, suicide is not an optimal way to go. It's giving up, quitting, cowardice etc vs. learning, changing, growing, striving, overcoming (yourself, suicidal thoughts, challenges etc.) & eventually dying a death worth dying whether via natural causes or by going down fighting - whether for victory, defending yourself etc.

As for suicidal thoughts themselves: I had them off and on throughout my life since childhood. They were the worst a couple of Summers ago when I had the worst depression of my life that just kept getting worse for 5 months or so. It was then that I figured out I had a chemical sensitivity to salicylate acids (and have read that 70% of those on the spectrum do) & instantly stopped eating/drinking or using anything on my skin with sa's. (sa's are plants' natural pesticide & preservative. they're sky high in gmo foods. they're in almost every fruit/veggie/herb/spice/plant oil and are much stronger in others.) Besides not eating them, I learned that I needed to use epsom salts on my skin to detox them via absorbing the magnesium sulphate, which I was deficient in due to taking Dexedrine - an ADHD stimulant that depletes magnesium & sulphur from the body. I've been using homemade epsom salt lotion on my skin daily for a year and a half or so now, but when I first started using it - the horribly negative clinical depression and near constant passively suicidal thoughts I was having all but completely disappeared after about 5 days. It was all a chemical induced drug trip.

I'm 100% serious about this and very highly recommend you experiment with some epsom salt lotion on your skin, especially the bottoms of your feet where you absorb it best. Either that or soak your feet in hot water saturated with epsom salts. Lotion is just more convenient. You can buy epsom salt lotion at pretty well any pharmacy/major grocery store.

If you have any questions about this, or about the other dietary/herbal/probiotic treatments I've had life changing success with as stated in the link in my sig, feel free to pm me as I'm a completely transparent open book about it all with anyone who would care to listen to it, learn from it, try it for themselves. Especially if it can be life saving as could be in the case of anyone who is having suicidal thoughts.

For anyone else reading this, feel free to PM as well. As for success since doing all of this: I haven't been suicidal - at all. I'm healthier, stronger, more productive (work), much more optimistic, wealthier (saving/investing more money than I have in my life before this) & continue to strive for and achieve new goals on a regular basis. Life is good & getting better. I'm still not at the point in life/work/business/finances that I'd consider that I'd consider myself successful or I've reached anywhere near my potential - but relative to 2 years ago; I'm definitely successful as I've leaped ahead immensely with improvements too numerous to count. Success isn't just about money, but being able to function in life and be financially stable and eventually successful is certainly advantageous and I intend to continue focusing on this, as well as health/fitness, and every other goal I have in life. I hope all of you find it within yourselves to do whatever you're able to to improve yourselves and better your lives vs. give in to thoughts of suicide. I hope that those of you who do have suicidal thoughts have a similar attitude to myself when I had them really badly: know that they're just thoughts and can't hurt you - only your actions can. Ignore those thoughts and realize there's something wrong, something causing them, and potentially a biochemical reason for it like I eventually figured out for myself. That or certain stressors, life events etc - but that those, too, are just things that happened and aren't worth no longer existing over. If you're of the school of thought that there's bound to be a logical rational reason WHY you have suicidal thoughts and know that there must be some way to change your thinking, change your thought processes, that you weren't always this way and that something is making you this way and thus something else can unmake you think that way.. then I urge you to explore the possibility that you, too, are among the vast majority of us on the spectrum that are sensitive to salicylate acids. Learn to avoid them for several months, detox them via epsom salts. If it isn't that, then at least you'll have explored an option and figured out it wasn't that - which is better than not trying anything at all, IMO.

I'm rambling.. so, I'll stop. Suicide is bad mmmkay? PM me if you want to chat about anything I've shared here.


You do realize you're in the lgbt discussion right? We're talking about transgender issues, not a chemical system gone wrong. Suicide isn't really a "bad" thing. It helps end suffering for those who can no longer deal with it, due to just being born with a set of cards that do them nothing in this life. We all die eventually as stated before, so that totally wipes out anything about it being "cowardly" to die early, those with that opinion will die anyways and will no longer matter too. In fact I think it's actually a "brave" thing to do since nobody knows what happens when one dies and one is taking action to relieve themselves of a pain nobody can cure. My only wish is for technology to improve to the point that everything can be totally improved so people can have a second chance, but it doesn't seem very likely, and a large majority of people still treat transgender as a terrible pestilence in society... so it really doesn't even look worthy to live that long for that technology when people will probably treat you worse. There's just too many factors against living.


I realize full well this is the lgbt forum. I'm gay.

You do realize this is an aspergers/autism forum, right? We're talking about neurological issues, thought processes, paradigms, self image, reactions etc.

I get that trans issues are different, but I've still met some super positive outgoing optimistic trans people who don't think negatively. This one in particular was so super self accepting and full of life even though her family disowned her and her kids won't have anything to do with her since she decided to transition from the he she used to be. Still, she's positive and moving forward with life and the work she's passionate about and so on.

It's been my experience that depression, suicidal thoughts, negativity and so forth can all be brought about by chemical imbalances caused by foods/environmental toxins, and can be successfully treated resulting in a whole heck of a lot happier and more self accepting person.


Didn't have to respond with a sarcastic remark, was just making sure you were posting knowing where you were posting. Everyone is different, I hate when people say so and so is trans, but she's living a happy life, why the f**k are you complaining? Lol. Ooh, I'm automatically that person since we happen to have "one" similar issue. Sorry, but I heard about everything you said before through other people and places, that's really not going to help me. You might say in response then why are you posting here? Simple, I want to see different responses other then the obvious.


Oh, really? So my sincere post about food & environmental chemical sensitivities causing clinical depression and suicidal thoughts was obvious to you to consider & explore as a potential cause for why you think and feel the way you do?

As for the true story of the happy tranny, my point is that it isn't being trans that makes you unhappy. It's your thinking. Thoughts dictate emotions. But why is your thinking that way? It's possible that it's being caused by the same chemical sensitivities as I had wreak havoc on my brain and mindset. IMO, it's worth exploring, considering the home chemistry experiment required to test it out is completely harmless and costs less than a dollar.


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30 Apr 2014, 5:16 pm

Prism wrote:
You do realize you're in the lgbt discussion right? We're talking about transgender issues, not a chemical system gone wrong. Suicide isn't really a "bad" thing. It helps end suffering for those who can no longer deal with it, due to just being born with a set of cards that do them nothing in this life. We all die eventually as stated before, so that totally wipes out anything about it being "cowardly" to die early, those with that opinion will die anyways and will no longer matter too. In fact I think it's actually a "brave" thing to do since nobody knows what happens when one dies and one is taking action to relieve themselves of a pain nobody can cure. My only wish is for technology to improve to the point that everything can be totally improved so people can have a second chance, but it doesn't seem very likely, and a large majority of people still treat transgender as a terrible pestilence in society... so it really doesn't even look worthy to live that long for that technology when people will probably treat you worse. There's just too many factors against living.



Goldfish is only trying to help, and honestly, he's making a *VERY* good point that should be taken seriously.

Look at it this way: What you're going through is a problem.... nobody is denying that. One of the nastier problems out there that's just hard to deal with. But, it's wrecking you SO hard that it even goes so far as to make it nigh-impossible to *really* search for things that can point you towards a solution.

What Goldfish was getting at wasnt just "Well if you look at this it's OBVIOUS that your real problem is just actually this OTHER bit", I think it's also more of the idea that the chemical bit.... and you better believe that DOES exist, like he said.... could be taking the dark feelings/moods normally produced by this sort of problem and MULTIPLYING them. This is one of the reasons why this sort of thing is worth looking into. Wouldnt it be great if you could at least remove some of the seismic impact on you that these moods/thoughts have? It'd sure be better than "oh I wanna die" over and over. And when you're not so heavily wrecked that you're thinking that way, it also means you're thinking alot more clearly, and you can look at the problem from a new viewpoint..... and who knows where you can go from there.

But you cant go anywhere at all sitting in a dark room wanting to kill yourself constantly. Which, again, is akin to giving up. But if the constant feeling of wanting to do that can be removed, well.... again, from there you can accomplish and find things that you otherwise would not. And I guarantee that in your current state, these thoughts/moods are utterly wrecking your ability to really, honestly, PROPERLY look into solutions for this sort of thing. That's part of what depression does. And the heavier it is, the worse the effect.



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30 Apr 2014, 5:57 pm

The world is changing so rapidly. Tomorrow a technological and/or social solution to our problems could arrive. That's what keeps me going from day-to-day!