Ever have trouble putting thoughts into words?

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em_tsuj
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18 May 2014, 1:04 am

I have problems with this, and it seems that my verbal communication is getting worse...unless I am talking about a special interest.



mr_bigmouth_502
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18 May 2014, 1:22 am

JoelFan wrote:
Yes, There's been times where I'm making a post on Facebook and half way through a message I decide to delete it...same can be said for this site I want to say something I want it to be as legible as possible but it's like my mind isn't communicating and shuts down if you will thus leaving me flustered and wanting to delete the whole f'ing message I really have to think hard and try to put my thoughts into proper words. and sometimes it SUCKS!

I know, right? I hate it when that happens.

em_tsuj wrote:
I have problems with this, and it seems that my verbal communication is getting worse...unless I am talking about a special interest.

I find my verbal communication as a whole has gotten worse over the last couple years, even when I am talking about my special interests. It depends on who I am talking to somewhat as well, and what situation it's in. In private company with people I am fairly close to, my speech flows much more naturally than it does when I am talking to people who I don't know as well, and it gets even worse when I am speaking in public. It's kind of a curse for me, because that's exactly the sort of situation where I DON'T want to screw up and make myself sound like an idiot, but it happens anyway.



ammmartin
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18 May 2014, 2:26 am

Definitely true in my case, alas.



DevilKisses
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18 May 2014, 3:28 am

If they're very abstract I do, but that applies to everyone. That is why religious people can get very crazy.


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mila_oblong
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18 May 2014, 3:39 am

I've had this problem for the last 29 years, it started when I was 3. That's when my mother started to wonder whether or not I had some sort of neurological problem that was rearing it's pretty :roll: head. I would get frustrated easily because I had trouble trying to communicate what it is that I wanted/or needed and ultimately have a tantrum. Yay. :roll:



Verdandi
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18 May 2014, 10:32 am

DevilKisses wrote:
If they're very abstract I do, but that applies to everyone. That is why religious people can get very crazy.


I don't think this is how that works.



DevilKisses
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18 May 2014, 2:38 pm

Verdandi wrote:
DevilKisses wrote:
If they're very abstract I do, but that applies to everyone. That is why religious people can get very crazy.


I don't think this is how that works.

It actually does just so you know.


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qawer
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18 May 2014, 3:06 pm

You have to be "connected" to the group/receiver to put thoughts properly/easily into words.

And that is exactly what we are not. We are disconnected.

The only way around is to try to think in people/what's best for the group mentality. And wanting to become a part of the group.

One has to think in inequality. "Who is more important"-mentality.

The equity-mentality of autistics is what prohibits verbal communication.



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18 May 2014, 3:10 pm

Oh, and the most frustrating thing is when you garble up something to the point someone feels insulted, when you meant just the opposite. My ideal strategy (when it's possible) in workplace, social, or organizational settings is to have "interpreters" who somehow can read me better (and that I'm calmer around). They can then take my ideas and develop or re-interpret them to a larger group. I just learn over time to feed ideas to certain people who can explain them more effectively to others.



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18 May 2014, 4:14 pm

On the HBO show "Silicon Valley", Richard came up with a very useful algorithm but he was unable to explain it to a venture capitalist. His friend easily described the value in it and the venture capitalist then understood.


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UmbrellaBirds
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18 May 2014, 4:42 pm

Sometimes I find it very hard to talk to people. It's a lot better if I write things down though. I especially hate it if I'm trying to remember a word and I can't think of it, so I try to describe the word, and it just comes out worse than I intended. Sometimes I wish I could say two things at once, what I actually say, then at the same time what I really mean. It's too bad I'm not a telepath, then I could just send messages directly from my mind. Sometimes I'll also say a different word than what I mean, but the word will be really close. Like, one day I meant to say Abcott (it was someone's name), but instead I said apricot. Then I instantly forget what I say so I can't even correct myself.



infilove
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18 May 2014, 5:10 pm

Yes this has always been an issue and struggle in that area too. I can verbalize pretty well, however, it's definitely a struggle. When I say things to people, I often look back and think of ways in how I would have said it better. If I ever have to write anything, I can word things pretty well, but it usually takes me a long time.

I especially struggled with this when I was younger. Whenever I had an argument with my sister, she would always win while I was stumped with words and it would make me very frustrated. Not being able to express what on you mind is frustrating in general. I find it's the hardest when trying to express the main central idea about something. It's also hard when your caught in an argument and you need to quickly expressing your main points to convince the other person your main point without being cutoff or beet down by their words.

I however have improved somewhat in this issue by constantly trying to talk to people, read, write, and take ginko and fish oil pills. Ginko pills helps make your mind sharper, and fish oil pills improves your short term memory.


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Verdandi
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18 May 2014, 8:54 pm

...

No longer relevant.



Last edited by Verdandi on 18 May 2014, 9:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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18 May 2014, 9:29 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
All the time.
Amen.


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jetbuilder
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18 May 2014, 9:38 pm

Yes, all the time. I prefer to communicate through text whenever I can because I can write out my thoughts, review them, rearrange, add or edit anything if needed and finally send it.

Verbal communication feels too fast paced. I kinda compare it to being faced with a pop quiz without warning and not having a chance to go over your notes (going over notes equates to typing out, rereading and editing a text before sending it).


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18 May 2014, 10:56 pm

It is really amazing how sluggish I can be with speech sometimes. People frequently ask what is wrong with me. It goes one of two ways: either my mind is racing and I am speaking just as fast, but saying things that seem disconnected or tangential to others; or, I have a clear idea of what I wish to say and I am struggling to connect one word to the next to communicate what I am thinking. My supervisor is very good at focusing attentively on my words when I have difficulty speaking, but most people will assume I am finished or have changed my mind about saying something and they will interrupt or change topic.